[Brother_Percy]

THE ATHEIST BIBLE (With Christian Commentary)


Friends,

I was in a debate with an atheist a few weeks back, when he came out with the most ridiculous thing I have EVER heard! He said “Yea?? Well your Bible would make a LOT more sense if an atheist wrote it!!” Seriously!? I had to laugh. Naturally, I was up for the challenge to prove him wrong! So, at that moment I decided I’d take on the task of wording an ‘atheist version’ of The Bible KJV1611, in a bid to show just how ridiculous and deluded the atheist religion REALLY is!

I will be posting regular updates, so please look out for them. And I’m REALLY looking forward to getting to the ‘Origins of man’ part, and showing just how dumb their full Evolution ‘theory’ sounds, next to our Creation FACT. I mean, how can they possibly expect us to believe we all ‘evolved’ from mud into fish, then into monkeys, then into men is just a few hundred years??! Those dumb atheists crack me up!

Anyways, let’s get this underway.

Enjoy!



THE ATHEIST BIBLE
(With Christian Commentary)


KJV1611 = The King James 1611 Bible Version

ATHEIST = The Atheist Bible Version


Genesis 1

KJV1611 V1. In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.

ATHEIST V1. In the beginning (or, around 6,000 years ago) there was nothing. Vast wide open spaces of nothing, acres of nothing as far as the eye could see, and, nothing whatsoever. No air, no seas, no rivers, no tiny little fishes swimming. No God, no Heaven, no big fluffy white clouds or choirs of angels singing. No Earth or Planets or Stars or even Galaxies. Not even any Outer Space! Just nothing. And Nothing whatsoever.


KJV1611 V2. And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.

ATHEIST V2. Then, suddenly, without warning, there was a BIG BANG! (Which makes no sense whatsoever, since every action has to have an equal and opposite reaction. It’s called ‘cause and effect’, friends! What action could 'nothing' possibly have taken to make the big bang 'bang' if God didn’t exist!? - answer that one, deluded atheists!) And then, suddenly, as if by ‘magic’ (which atheists don’t believe in either!) there were billons of planets everywhere!

Where did all those Planets come from? Well, after the ‘Big Bang’ there was all sorts of rubble and rocks and boulders and debris and garbage just floating around Outer Space (where did it come from? There was nothing there to begin with?! Maybe is just ‘magically’ appeared too??) and all those bits of rubble and rocks and boulders and debris and garbage suddenly became ‘magically’ attracted to each other, and all joined together to form perfectly round, perfectly spherical planets! (Try this one at home, friends - Take a whole bunch of rubble and rocks and boulders and debris and garbage, and dump it all out back, leave it for a few weeks, and see if it all 'magically' joins together to form a perfectly round, perfectly spherical ball shape!)

Yes, that’s right, friends! Atheists believe that this ‘Big Bang’ thingy somehow ‘magically’ (which, as I said, atheists don’t believe in!) formed our perfectly round, perfectly spherical Planet, ‘magically’ put a molten core at the centre, ‘magically’ put water on top, ‘magically’ gave it gravity, and ‘magically’ made it capable of sustaining human life! (Try this one at home, friends - Try setting off a firecracker inside an empty goldfish bowl, and see if entire universes form! It’s amazing! You will see that NOTHING ACTUALLY HAPPENS! How dumb these atheists are!)


KJV1611 V3. And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.

ATHEIST V3. Then, as if by magic (which atheists don’t believe in!), one of the Planets caught fire (who lit the match?), and then all the other Planets that were close to it ‘magically’ started revolving around it! (Try this one at home, friends - Get a handful of rocks, douse one of them in gasoline and set it alight, and then see if the other rocks go into orbit around the burning one!) And this Planet we called ‘The Sun’. And The Sun, which atheists ‘believe’ is 93 million miles away from the Earth, is where all our light comes from! Seriously! Atheists actually believe this! (Try this one at home, friends – Wait till it’s really dark at night, then try setting light to a tennis ball, then driving 93 miles away from it, and see if you can still see it! OF COURSE YOU CAN’T! It’s ridiculous!)


I hope you enjoyed this first post of 'The Atheist Bible (with Christian Commentary)'. Look out for my regular updates, which will prove without a doubt that the atheist religion makes absolutely NO SENSE WHATSOEVER! Praise Jesus!