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Default SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 05:24 PM

Greetings Unsaved Trash.

I have noticed a great deal of Unsaved Trash lurking on GOD'S Favorite Forum™ lately. I believe that JESUS has sent you here for a reason. To be SAVED®!!!

This Month Only when you register and Tithe (minimum $2,500) you will receive one free kitty.



HURRY! Supplies are limited. Colors may vary from kitty to kitty.

Enthusiastic, Sister Thumper




Tweet me Here
My GODLY Bio Here
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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 05:26 PM

Awww Shucks BTB.
Makes you almost want to become a new member of God's™ favourite Forum again!!



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HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 08:29 PM

I WANT ONE! I WANT ONE!

I already have 13, but what's one more. Could I renew my membership Thumper??

Moon


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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 09:21 PM

Oooh, I want one too!! Not fair, my last kitty was a demon possessed old thing...
If I tithe extra hard in the Good Lord's name, can I possibly adopt a kitty too??

~Rain
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Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 09:22 PM

"you must spreads some reputations around before givin it to Miss.BTB agains"

that there a annointed kitty, Miss.BTB. she sweet an demure, she gots them true christain lady tempermints™ an maybee she be a good influince on Miss.Tyson an Miss.Holyfields


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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 10:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
Greetings Unsaved Trash.

I have noticed a great deal of Unsaved Trash lurking on GOD'S Favorite Forum™ lately. I believe that JESUS has sent you here for a reason. To be SAVED®!!!

This Month Only when you register and Tithe (minimum $2,500) you will receive one free kitty.



HURRY! Supplies are limited. Colors may vary from kitty to kitty.

Enthusiastic, Sister Thumper
That's all nice and good, but just make sure no gooks try and get their hands on any of those kittens. I bet Hitoshi was licking his lips and carving himself some new chop sticks when he read about this opportunity
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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 11:19 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Remy Lebeau View Post
That's all nice and good, but just make sure no gooks try and get their hands on any of those kittens. I bet Hitoshi was licking his lips and carving himself some new chop sticks when he read about this opportunity
How can we be certain that no one that will do these kittens harm gets them??

Moon


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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 11:22 PM

What are you talking about? Kittens are food items just like chickens.


Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 11:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
What are you talking about? Kittens are food items just like chickens.
I was thinking the same thing, cat, served as a dish, deserves more respect.
It's actually quite delicous, somewhat similar in taste to rabbit.

Now... May I have one of those cute little kittens to.. cuddle?


If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Smile Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 11:45 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Pastor Al E Gristle View Post
What are you talking about? Kittens are food items just like chickens.
Mr.Pastor Pistle, i be prayin lord God releese you from that liddle yellow demon of exotick foods!
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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 11:51 PM

Ooohhh a free kitty!!
I want one!!
Shame that I'm a dedicated heathen



Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-25-2006, 11:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.SalivationSeeker View Post
Now... May I have one of those cute little kittens to.. cuddle?
you can cuddles this here innernet kitty, Mr.Seeker

<--- she be safes from you!
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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-26-2006, 12:05 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Petal View Post
you can cuddles this here innernet kitty, Mr.Seeker


<--- she be safes from you!
Bah..
That's no good, I want a pet which I can eat after I've cuddled it.
My pa' used to have all these cute rabbits when I was a kid, and when I got hungry and fancied some rabbit meat;
I simply went out, grabbed one and cuddled it for a while, then broke it's neck and gave it to the servants so they could cock me a delicious dinner.

Why can't one do the same with cats, because as Pastor Pistle pointed out, they are food items..
Yet many people use them as pets..
So why couldn't one combine the two?
A pet which you eat once hungry or fed up with it?

Now please hand me a kitty.


If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-26-2006, 12:13 AM

The Holy Bible is clear on this point. Jesus ate meat, but we don't know from which animal. It could have been catmeat for all we know.

I too enjoyed cuddling, then eating soft fluffy bunnies as a child. I have always felt that cuteness has no bearing on edibility. There's nothing cuter than a baby piglet, but who would turn down a succulent slab of bacon?

I'll take a few of those cats too.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Petal Petal is offline
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Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Petal is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Question Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-26-2006, 12:30 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.SalivatinSeeker View Post
Now please hand me a kitty.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiller of kittys View Post
I'll take a few of those cats too.
nows, i not want to cause no offenses, but you menfolk got eyes bigger than your stomack, it true. i not no for shore, but i thinks kitty meat be kinda tuff an gamey , it taste real bad cuz kittys be carnivores, so when you eats a kitty you be eatin all the mouses they eated but maybee that not so bad cuz mouses eat cheese so maybee kittys taste like cheddar or bloo vein
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Brother_Mike Brother_Mike is offline
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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-26-2006, 12:32 AM

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Originally Posted by MoonFlower View Post
How can we be certain that no one that will do these kittens harm gets them??

Moon
Moon if you become a TC I promise not to hurt your kitty


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SalvationSeeker SalvationSeeker is offline
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SalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSalvationSeeker has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-26-2006, 12:35 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Petal View Post
nows, i not want to cause no offenses, but you menfolk got eyes bigger than your stomack, it true. i not no for shore, but i thinks kitty meat be kinda tuff an gamey , it taste real bad cuz kittys be carnivores, so when you eats a kitty you be eatin all the mouses they eated but maybee that not so bad cuz mouses eat cheese so maybee kittys taste like cheddar or bloo vein
As I said earlier, cat taste somewhat similar to rabbit.
They don't taste bad at all.


If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: But if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
A foolish woman is clamorous: She is simple, and knoweth nothing.
Proverbs 9:12-13
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Pastor Al E Pistle Pastor Al E Pistle is offline
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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-26-2006, 12:43 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
Ooohhh a free kitty!!
I want one!!
Shame that I'm a dedicated heathen
Convert and we'll give you a kitten!


Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


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MoonFlower MoonFlower is offline
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MoonFlower is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.MoonFlower is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.MoonFlower is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.MoonFlower is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.MoonFlower is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.MoonFlower is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.MoonFlower is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.MoonFlower is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.MoonFlower is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.MoonFlower is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.MoonFlower is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-26-2006, 12:47 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother_Mike View Post
Moon if you become a TC I promise not to hurt your kitty


But I'd be such a bad TC Mike, just ask everyone here what a horrible TC I was before. Would you have patience with me??

Moon

PS - Any man that promises to be nice to my kitty deserves anything he wants.


You pray...I dance naked in the forest
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Brother_Mike Brother_Mike is offline
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Default Re: SPECIAL! for Unsaved Trash - This Month Only! - 09-26-2006, 12:48 AM

If Rachel and Moon convert, I'll give them each a box of deer slugs for free!


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