The Landover Baptist Church
Like us or burn

Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > General Church Fellowship > The Poetaster's Korner

The Poetaster's Korner Tasteful poetry for JESUS but don't let the flowers fool you. NO HOMERS ALLOWED!

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 08-26-2013, 06:28 AM
Fallen Angel's Avatar
Fallen Angel Fallen Angel is offline
Resident gothtard witch
Forum Member

Hellbound Heathen How dumb can you get? Cancer on Society Rides the Short Bus 

Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 195
Fallen Angel is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Fallen Angel is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Fallen Angel is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Fallen Angel is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Fallen Angel is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Fallen Angel is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.Fallen Angel is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default plz no drons

im not american but mr obman u wud change
i wud vote 4 u but mr obama u wud hope
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons
im not american so u mite not here me
i wud have voted 4 u cuz u were gonna be diffrent
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons
da drons are hurtin ppl mr obmaa plz stop
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 08-26-2013, 06:39 AM
Pastor Ed Lowman's Avatar
Pastor Ed Lowman Pastor Ed Lowman is offline
Southern Hospitality Exemplified
Always kind and loving
True Christian™

True Christian™ Protected by JESUS 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Pastor of GOD Tithing Manager Pro-Life Porn Resistant Persecuted Friend of Jesus Teabag Patriot True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Christian Love Heaven Bound Super Soaker Baptism Award Real American™ Flat Earth Tell her once Punched the most queers True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Flat Earth Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Paula Deen Negro Support Group 

Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: mostly at the Cracker Barrel
Posts: 1,830
Pastor Ed Lowman will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ed Lowman will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ed Lowman will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ed Lowman will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ed Lowman will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ed Lowman will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ed Lowman will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ed Lowman will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ed Lowman will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ed Lowman will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ed Lowman will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: plz no drons

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fallen Angel View Post
im not american but mr obman u wud change
i wud vote 4 u but mr obama u wud hope
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons
im not american so u mite not here me
i wud have voted 4 u cuz u were gonna be diffrent
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons
da drons are hurtin ppl mr obmaa plz stop
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons
That retardedly incoherent mess I just read is why I have to remember to take my high blood pressure meds.

Maybe we should ask our next president to ban you from the internet?

Pastor Ed
__________________

Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 08-26-2013, 06:45 AM
Levi Jones's Avatar
Levi Jones Levi Jones is offline
Associate Pastor of Theology
God's Secret Weapon
Faint Not If You Are Rebuked By Him.
 

True Christian™ 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Ex-liberal True Christian Caucasian The Lord’s Witness Wound The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Gunfest '06 Tithing Manager Saved 1 Year Pastor of GOD One Year/1000 posts Senior Pastor Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth TC Bravery Gunfest '09 Tell her once Persecuted Mission to Las Vegas True Republican Super Soaker Baptism Award Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Punched the most queers 2010 Witch Hunt Award Pro-Life Outreach preacher Early riser Teabag Patriot Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Public Awareness Medal Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Hatchet Child Rearing Award Long service medal, 3rd class True Scientist™ True Christian Hotrodder Touched by Jesus Kirk Cameron Fan Club 

Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: With my nose stuck in the Bible.
Posts: 13,581
Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: plz no drons

I think it is anti-Obama using drones. This issue confuses me. If it had been Bush doing it, I would have said he was doing a good job hunting terrorists.
Since it's Obama, I just know it is a slippery slope until he uses them on me.

My desire for maximum body count or my paranoia knowing it's not a member of my team behind the trigger.
__________________
Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

Contact me for private counseling. levijoneslbc@gmail.com
See Landover's new ministry at:
http://apologeticsministries.com


Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 08-26-2013, 08:25 AM
WilliamJenningsBryan's Avatar
WilliamJenningsBryan WilliamJenningsBryan is offline
True Christian™
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Real American™ Gold Tither Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS TC Bravery Christian Love Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Nerd True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Home Schooled Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life True Republican Eats the Most Pork Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Prayer Warrior Early riser Touched by Jesus 

Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 6,124
WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: plz no drons

Does anyone know if Microsoft Flight Simulator has a drone plug-in?
__________________
Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 08-26-2013, 10:59 AM
Ezekiel Bathfire's Avatar
Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
Christ's Rottweiler
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Christian Love Real American™ Tithing Manager Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Senior Pastor Teabag Patriot TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Eats the Most Pork True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Nuts for JESUS! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus 

Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
Posts: 18,054
Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: plz no drons

im not american but mr obman u wud change
i wud vote 4 u but mr obama u wud hope
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons
im not american so u mite not here me
i wud have voted 4 u cuz u were gonna be diffrent
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons
da drons are hurtin ppl mr obmaa plz stop
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons


I see this as a cry from the heart of the disenfranchised – a literary parallel with the cinematographic bringing visions of that famous scene in which a baby carriage hurls down the steps in Eisenstein’s “Potemkin” A scene that did so much to tell the world of the power of the Lord in directing events. The poem is also strongly redolent of the scene of the knight’s unwitting confession to Death in Ingmar Bergman’s “The Seventh Seal”. It shows how we mortals play into the hands of a powerful God and how our fate can never be escaped.

Even more, as many of you will be thinking even now, “What about Andrei Tarkovsky’s sequential juxtaposition to what Einsenstein might have called a “vertical montage”? Instead of destroying the sense of continuity by the total lack of capitalization and punctuation, the dynamic focus reveals hidden possibilities within the (in this case) verse.

It is either that or the writer is an illiterate and godless harlot devoid of all education.

I will pray to Jesus for an answer.
__________________


“The only place you don’t want to hear “Jesus loves you” is in a Mexican prison.”
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 08-26-2013, 03:15 PM
James Hutchins's Avatar
James Hutchins James Hutchins is offline
True Christian™
Just a Regular Nice Guy
 

True Christian™ Silver Tither Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Provider™ award Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator TC Bravery Gunfest '09 Ready for the Rapture Punched the most queers Jailed for JESUS True Christian Caucasian The Lord’s Witness Wound Teabag Patriot Mission to Australia One Year/1000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life ex-sheep-shagger Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Hotrodder Saved 1 Year Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award 20,000 posts Long service medal, 3rd class Home Schooled Touched by Jesus 

Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain
Posts: 24,995
James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Cool Re: plz no drons

Dear Fallen Angel,
Apprently, you have not fallen far enough.


You frogs gave Obanana the Nobel peace prize just for becoming the first nigra. Now you want decent peoples help? I think you need to refer to you KJV Bible.
Leviticus 21:17-23
17 Speak unto Aaron, saying, Whosoever he be of thy seed in their generations that hath any blemish, let him not approach to offer the bread of his God.
18 For whatsoever man he be that hath a blemish, he shall not approach: a blind man, or a lame, or he that hath a flat nose, or any thing superfluous,
19 Or a man that is brokenfooted, or brokenhanded,
20 Or crookbackt, or a dwarf, or that hath a blemish in his eye, or be scurvy, or scabbed, or hath his stones broken;
21 No man that hath a blemish of the seed of Aaron the priest shall come nigh to offer the offerings of the Lord made by fire: he hath a blemish; he shall not come nigh to offer the bread of his God.
22 He shall eat the bread of his God, both of the most holy, and of the holy.
23 Only he shall not go in unto the vail, nor come nigh unto the altar, because he hath a blemish; that he profane not my sanctuaries: for I the Lord do sanctify them.
__________________
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 08-27-2013, 03:48 AM
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award 

Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Posts: 76,891
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: plz no drons

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fallen Angel View Post
im not american but mr obman u wud change
i wud vote 4 u but mr obama u wud hope
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons
im not american so u mite not here me
i wud have voted 4 u cuz u were gonna be diffrent
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons
da drons are hurtin ppl mr obmaa plz stop
da world iz cryin mr obama plz no drons
Translation:

__________________
Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here

The information presented here is Biblically accurate. Opinions concerning the technical difficulties, fitness requirements, safety, and ratings of self-crucifixion, flagellation, stoning, destroying enemies of GOD utterly, without mercy, and other activities inherent in Christianity are subjective and may differ from yours or others' opinions; therefore be warned that you must exercise your own judgment as to the difficulty and your ability to safely protect yourself from the inherent risks and dangers. Do not use the information provided on this site unless you are a True Christian ™ who understands and accepts the risks of participating in these activities. Landover Baptist Church makes reasonable efforts to include accurate and up to date information on this website, errors or omissions sometimes occur, therefore the information contained on here is provided "as is" and without warranties of any kind either expressed or implied. Viewing, reading, or any other use of the information contained within this web site is purely the voluntary will of the viewer or user. You, 'the viewer' or 'user' shall not hold the publisher, owner, authors or other contributors of The Jesus Experience responsible for any incidents related directly or indirectly to the Experience. Landover Baptist Church, et. al., assumes no liability or responsibility for your actions.


All times are GMT. The time now is 05:17 PM.


Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1999, 2009 all rights reserved