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Default A Music Legend Returns - 09-19-2015, 10:46 PM

From Country Matters magazine, October 2015. Reprinted with permission.

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His mustache is grey now, his voice a little huskier than when he first took the stage three decades ago. His face looks more than ever like it was hewn from the Rockies. But there's plenty of fire left in Roper Crossburn. At 58, the Iowa singer-songwriter remains a force in the world of Christian country, with a new album and tour on the way as well as a song that he hopes will become a part of the presidential race. Ask him yourself, and he’ll tell you he’s just getting started.

"This is the best record I ever made," says Roper. "All the other ones, they were good, but this is the best." He pauses and stares, and for a moment appears gripped in a spasm of anger. Then he continues. "It's better than the others."

Arriving December 18, Real Men Love Jesus is prime Crossburn: fifteen tracks of joyous worship and incisive social commentary, seasoned with a pinch of righteous rage. Though his guitar playing will not be confused for Clapton, the licks come sharp and clean, creating a vintage country sound that suits his voice and lyrics. A rich vein of sociopolitical awareness runs through his work. With an eye for wit and satire, he delivers his unabashedly right-wing point of view in a melodic rumble that some have likened to the Man in Black. Roper, however, dismisses such praise.

"Johnny Cash is in Hell," he says. "He sang songs by Trent Razor and Tony Danzig—Satanists. I heard he was a drug addict too. Don’t ever compare me to that devil."

Indeed, his main influence is a different JC.

"One hundred percent, Christ inspires everything I do. Most popular music is made by queers, so I don't listen to it. I tore the radio right out of my truck. Now I keep my Bible and my gun there."

Crossburn is proudly old-fashioned. While today's country stars tweet incessantly and take selfies onstage, Roper doesn't even have a cell phone. He forgot his email password years ago and deleted his Facebook after getting too many likes from black people. Recoiling at the sight of Luke Bryan in skinny jeans, he says he's worn the same boot-cut pair since the eighties; ditto for the boots themselves, which have been re-soled a dozen times. "A fellow did tell me last week that I had a great sense of style," he says. "I told him to get lost or he'd be spitting up teeth."

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Crossburn in high school (left) and the eighties (right)

Born Silas Lee Crossburn to Arkansas working folks, Roper spent his early career in bars, playing lurid songs awash in sex and booze. He briefly charted with 1986's "She Had It Comin'," but personal troubles held him back from lasting success.

"I was lost," he says with disarming candor. "Fighting, smoking dope, even whoring. I used to scrub my private parts with bleach to try and wash away the whore juice. I hated everyone I met, and I didn't know why." While jailed on battery charges in 1988, he found a copy of the Bible left by another inmate. The discovery would change his life forever. "When I learned that God had a plan for me, that I was Saved and those animals weren't, it all made sense.

"My favorite bits," he adds, grinning, "are the ones where He kills sinners and sends them straight to Hell."

His newfound faith fueled a burst of creativity. Leaving the bar circuit behind, he moved to Freehold, Iowa and began performing at the Landover Baptist Church, a fiercely pro-life, King James-only house of worship that welcomed him like a lost son. It was there that he met and married former stripper Rosalie-Ann Wagner. Although estranged from their three children, Roper and Rosie remain inseparable; he regards her as his muse, his best friend, and "the only member of that species worthy of my seed." Landover Records has also blossomed thanks to his success. Once a humble hymn-and-sermon label run out of the church basement, it now boasts an array of artists from diverse genres, including fellow country crooner Billy Bob Jenkins, "life metal" band Golgotha, and blackface rappers Da Rychiss Brothaz.

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Crossburn and his wife Rosalie-Ann

Real Men Love Jesus breaks little new ground, but that's just fine with Roper—and his audience. All his favorite themes are here, from immigration and race ("Heads on the Fence," "Ape City") to LGBT rights ("You Tell 'Em, Kim," "Queers Are the Disease, AIDS Is the Cure"), along with country-fried covers of classic church songs. Legally barred from singing about Obama since a court ruled that his 2010 opus Audacity of Rope contained terroristic threats, Crossburn has invented a new villain: gay Muslim dictator Barry Oogabooga, who rules America "with a limp wrist and an iron fist" from the watermelon-shaped Black House. The hero who rises up and finally defeats him? None other than Donald Trump.

"I wrote this one for the Don," Crossburn says of his anthem "The Garbageman." "We see eye-to-eye on a lot of issues. I believe he's the one that's gonna take out the trash. Fags, beaners, whores, junkies, leeches—they're the reason we've got so many damn Democrats in office. These so-called people are lower than dirt. They belong in landfills, not in voting booths." Although he has yet to receive a response, Crossburn has written to Trump and mailed several CDs to his campaign headquarters. He remains optimistic that the candidate will embrace his song.

"It chapped my hide when I heard him come out to that REM crap. The guy that sings that is a queer. It just ain't right, what they do to each other's asses, and I don't need to be reminded of it whenever my man comes on the teevee. Queers are demons in human skin."

Following the record's release will be a multi-state tour, starting Christmas Eve at Freehold's Paley Field and culminating with a headline gig at the Joyful Noise Music Festival in Biloxi, Mississippi in March. Live performance has always been the heart and soul of Roper's act. "Once I tried some target practice with my .44 while I was playing. Ended up shooting my drummer's ear off. The next time, I missed."

A new Crossburn release is always an exciting event, but this time, the thrill is bittersweet. The crooner has dedicated Real Men Love Jesus to a fallen friend.

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Music journalist Geoffrey Zales

"People think Geoff and I didn't like each other," he says of the late music critic Geoffrey Zales. "But they don't know the whole story." The two had a lengthy feud beginning in 2007, when Zales penned a scathing Pitchfork review of Roper's latest LP, Appetite for Salvation. In response, Crossburn released a music video in which a Zales lookalike was sodomized by demons. A brawl at the 2011 Big Valley Jamboree left the Austin-based journalist with a spork in his eye and Crossburn behind bars. Despite being partially blinded, Zales maintained his acerbic wit, calling Crossburn "a sad manchild with a micropenis, if not a nanopenis." The singer admits that his soul was troubled by the incident.

"I started drinking again when I got out of the joint. Much as it hurts to say, I stopped praying.”

Zales wasn’t done. He next attacked Roper’s character with the Vice magazine story "Holy Hush Money." Dredging up a 1995 case, settled outside of court, in which two teenage girls accused Crossburn of raping them backstage, Zales alleged that the settlement sum was much greater than disclosed—and came straight from Landover's coffers. The implication was that Crossburn was guilty, which he knew to be false. "Adultery is a sin, and the Bible says True Christians are incapable of sin. I never laid a finger on those little sluts.

"Or in them," he adds with a sly chuckle.

Crossburn had a good case for a libel suit, but the last place he wanted to be was in another courtroom. He seemed trapped in a downward spiral—until, he says, a miracle happened. "One night I took too many pills for my back and passed out by the fire. When I woke up, I saw Jesus Christ standing over me. He said 'Roper, you listen good, and you do what I tell you.' So I listened. The next day, I called Geoff up and apologized. I told him I forgave him for what he'd done, and that I hoped he might forgive me too. Said I was praying hard that he'd find the Lord. Honest injun, I did cry. I had forgotten what the peace of God truly felt like. It wasn't long after that... that he was gone."

Zales was shot dead in February in what authorities described as a botched home invasion. Although the crime remains unsolved, Crossburn has promised to deliver "a knuckle sandwich" should he ever come face-to-face with the perpetrator. For now, he is focusing on his career, his family, and his faith.

"I am so thankful to God for blessing me with this talent. He put me on Earth to spread His Word through the music I make. If people get it, wonderful. If not, well, that's okay too. One day I'll be up in Heaven, singing songs with Jesus and laughing while my critics burn in Hell."

That day may come. Until it does, Roper Crossburn is stuck down here with the rest of us—and he's walking tall.

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Jesus' eternal love Re: A Music Legend Returns - 09-20-2015, 12:21 AM



Oh Brother Ropeburn, it's so good to see you back! There is not a day that goes by that I don't listen to your CD Here Comes the Son in my car on my way to Church each day.




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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 09-20-2015, 02:46 AM

I'm such a big ole' fan! I just get so excited and nervous when I hear his voice! He makes me want to jump and cry out in submission to Jesus! Then the crowd starts demanding more... CROSS BURN CROSS BURN CROSS BURN

I'll be getting group tickets for the Landover Boy's Youth Group. I'm gonna show them what a real man looks like, up close and in the flesh!


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 09-26-2015, 01:21 PM

Hello Roper, I must confess I'm not familiar with your music.

Tell me, do you have any songs about standing your ground or the open carry movement?


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 09-28-2015, 04:22 PM

Matter of fact I do. Had a song on my last record called From My Cold Dead Hands, about what I would do if Obama's thugs came to take my guns away. I've also got a new one called Make My Day about the whole Treyvon brouhaha. I think you'll like it.

If you've never heard my music before, I suggest you start with my last record, Burn This Way. The new one is better but it's not out yet. Write me a check and I'll send a copy your way. I wish I could say to buy it off Itunes, but they keep yanking my records on account of "hate speech." Meanwhile, black rappers sing about killing white people, killing cops... they win Grammys and Hollywood makes movies about them. It's a clear conspiracy against good Christian white folks and Country music.


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-08-2015, 01:20 PM

Hi Mr Crossburn. This is like a dream come true, being on the same forum. I am a true music lover. You are fantastic, Praise God!

I am hoping you can help me. I have been searching for some of your albums and came across this on an internet trading forum.

I am wondering if I am being conned or is this in fact one of your albums?



I am really hoping it is legitimate.

Thank you.


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-09-2015, 01:19 AM

Mr. Crossburn, I am so happy to hear of your new album! My husband already wrote a check and had me send it in the mail!


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Prayer Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-09-2015, 06:53 PM

The Martin guitar is a nice choice. Made in USA.

Brother Roper, can we expect a Christmas album from you, in time for Jesus' birthday this year? I'd be particularly interested in your interpretation of "We 3 Kings of Orient Are."


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-09-2015, 06:59 PM

Oh, also, Brother Roper, I promised to ask you this question, on behalf of Mexico, which has no internet: Would you be so kind, as to record a song in Espańol? A rousing tune, rich in Latino-honored themes, would be mui apreciado. 8-track format, por favor. Gracias. Dios te bendiga.


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-09-2015, 07:42 PM

This is my damn Christmas album. Comes out a week before Christmas, got two Christmas songs on it. One of 'em's about the Baby Jesus and the other's about what would happen if Santa came down my chimney and tried to cram his prick up my ass, and what happens is I fill his skull up with lead. I don't know what more you could ask for. The hell I ain't singing in Mexican.

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I am really hoping it is legitimate.

Thank you.
I've been looking high and low for a copy of that. How much you want for it?


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-10-2015, 01:43 AM

Mr Crossburn, Sir, please allow me to gift this album to you. As soon as it arrives in the mail I shall send it on.

Be assured I am rather crafty at seeking out albums. I predict there will be many more to come.



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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-10-2015, 11:38 AM

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Originally Posted by Roper Crossburn View Post
This is my damn Christmas album. Comes out a week before Christmas, got two Christmas songs on it. One of 'em's about the Baby Jesus and the other's about what would happen if Santa came down my chimney and tried to cram his prick up my ass, and what happens is I fill his skull up with lead.
It Arrived! I shall send it C/O Landover Baptist Church?

Side One
01. Spit Your Love Up On My Soul, Baby Jesus.
02. Don't Touch My Hole Santa (This Chimney Ain't Made For You)
03. Filled Santa Full Of Led, Now He's Dead.
04. I Painted My Fireplace Red For Christmas.
05. Hypothetically (Is This Bad?)

Side Two
01. Hangin' His Balls On A Tree (Feeding The Rest To The Dog)
02. I Tunes (My Guitar for Jesus)
03. It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Rapture
04. 48 Gifts Hidden In The Trees (Might be 49 But My Recollection Is Blurred Because The Eggnog Was Strong, Just Get In The Car Already Little Girl, Or You Don't Get A Present. Oh You're Mexican, Get Outta My Car)
05. Look At My Son, Young Lady (Good Night)






Ecclesiastes 1:18 - For in much wisedome is much griefe: and hee that increaseth knowledge, increaseth sorrow.


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-10-2015, 01:02 PM

This has proven to be the luckiest day ever, thank you Jesus!



Side One
01. A Hard Day's Night (But Not Really)
02. She Should Have Known Better (Stupid Woman)
03. If I Fell (In The Hole I Dug For You)
04. I'm Happy Just To Dance On You (And Party Like Its 1666)
05. And I Love Her (Lifeless Body)
06. Tell Me Why (Because You're A Whore)
07. Can't Buy Me Love (Or Your Freedom)

Side Two
02. I'll Cry Instead (Yes You Will, For Jesus, But It Won't Do Any Good Because He Doesn't Care For Prostitutes)
03. Things We Said Today (Will Never Be Spoken Again)
05. You Can't Do That (But I just Did)
06. I'll Be Back (With Another Body For Jesus)


Ecclesiastes 1:18 - For in much wisedome is much griefe: and hee that increaseth knowledge, increaseth sorrow.


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-10-2015, 02:31 PM



SIDE ONE
01 Blunt Iron (Up The Side Of Your Head, For Jesus)
02 Red Water (In My Makeshift Laundry)
03 Billy The Kid (You've Got My Goat)
04 A Hundred And Sixty Acres (Of Bodies)
05 They're Hanging Me Tonight (No They're Not It's Life)
06 Strawberry Roan (Could Of Been Joan? I Forget Their Names)

SIDE TWO
01 El Paso (Burn Burn Burn)
02 In The Valley (3 Feet Under)
03 The Master's Call (Come Running Woman)
04 Running Guns (For Jesus)
05 Down In The Little Green River (That's Where They'll Be)
06 Utah Carol (Like I Said, I Forget Their Names)


Ecclesiastes 1:18 - For in much wisedome is much griefe: and hee that increaseth knowledge, increaseth sorrow.


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-25-2015, 07:12 AM

Tony Danza wrote country songs? I guess he had some talent, after all.


A whip for the horse, a bridle for the ass, and a rod for the fool's back. Proverbs 26:3
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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-25-2015, 03:33 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Back against wall View Post


SIDE ONE
01 Blunt Iron (Up The Side Of Your Head, For Jesus)
02 Red Water (In My Makeshift Laundry)
03 Billy The Kid (You've Got My Goat)
04 A Hundred And Sixty Acres (Of Bodies)
05 They're Hanging Me Tonight (No They're Not It's Life)
06 Strawberry Roan (Could Of Been Joan? I Forget Their Names)

SIDE TWO
01 El Paso (Burn Burn Burn)
02 In The Valley (3 Feet Under)
03 The Master's Call (Come Running Woman)
04 Running Guns (For Jesus)
05 Down In The Little Green River (That's Where They'll Be)
06 Utah Carol (Like I Said, I Forget Their Names)
Can we get a review? I'm already bummed that a rendition of Amazing Grace is nowhere to be seen, but as long as there are organs and a choir in the album, I might consider it.


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-25-2015, 03:45 PM

Cowboy movies are very popular in my home which is Jamaica. We like John Wayne whose father was actually a Black man. We also like the shootouts the best. When the cowboys start to shoot we pull out our guns and shoot up in the air. No one wants to sit in the balcony. If you shoot at the screen the management will ask you to leave. Our favorite cowboy song is Two Pistols and a Bowie Knife (and a folding knife and a switchblade knife and another knife).

Many cowboys were Black men but you don't see that in the movies.


Sing unto God, sing praises to his name: Extol him that rideth upon the heavens By his name JAH, and rejoice before him.-Psalms 68:4
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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-25-2015, 03:48 PM

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Originally Posted by I Man Rastafari View Post
Cowboy movies are very popular in my home which is Jamaica. We like John Wayne whose father was actually a Black man. We also like the shootouts the best. When the cowboys start to shoot we pull out our guns and shoot up in the air. No one wants to sit in the balcony. If you shoot at the screen the management will ask you to leave. Our favorite cowboy song is Two Pistols and a Bowie Knife (and a folding knife and a switchblade knife and another knife).

Many cowboys were Black men but you don't see that in the movies.
Yeah, is that right.



Ecclesiastes 1:18 - For in much wisedome is much griefe: and hee that increaseth knowledge, increaseth sorrow.


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Default Re: A Music Legend Returns - 10-25-2015, 03:59 PM

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Originally Posted by I Man Rastafari View Post
Cowboy movies are very popular in my home which is Jamaica. We like John Wayne whose father was actually a Black man. We also like the shootouts the best. When the cowboys start to shoot we pull out our guns and shoot up in the air. No one wants to sit in the balcony. If you shoot at the screen the management will ask you to leave. Our favorite cowboy song is Two Pistols and a Bowie Knife (and a folding knife and a switchblade knife and another knife).

Many cowboys were Black men but you don't see that in the movies.
That makes a lot of sense now that I think about it. During the slavery days, in the South, slave owners and overseers used to call the negroes, "boy". For example, "come here, boy!", "git, boy!", "you dun goofed, boy!" so on so forth.

Some of these slaves were also tasked with taking care of the cows. Early in the morning, the slave master would say "go milk a cow, boy!" and eventually, he would just say "cow, boy!" and you know the rest.


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