The Landover Baptist Church
Like us or burn

Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > Promise Enforcers - Men Only!

Promise Enforcers - Men Only! We make Promise Keepers look like homers! No homosexuals or women allowed!

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 02-14-2014, 04:04 AM
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 

Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Posts: 76,664
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

THIS story made me realize how badly Obama has ruined this country. Where do girls get the idea that marriage is their choice?
Quote:
'Unhung Hero' Star Patrick Moote's Small Penis Led To An Embarrassing Proposal Fail

Patrick Moote faced public humiliation when his girlfriend rejected his proposal in front of a stadium full of UCLA basketball fans, and it got even worse when a video of the incident went viral on YouTube.

But even that wasn't even the worst part. When Moote asked her later why she didn't want to marry him, she said the thing no man ever wants to hear -- his penis was too small.

The botched proposal bruised Moote's ego, but he told HuffPost Live's Nancy Redd that his girlfriend's dissatisfaction with his size wasn't completely out of the blue.

"It's not like I didn't know that it was kind of a problem. I see my penis every day, so I was kind of aware of what was going on," he said.

After he recovered from the initial shock of being rejected, Moote started to think about how penis size is an issue that every man worries about but no one wants to discuss publicly. He decided to change that by making a "cockumentary" called "Unhung Hero," which documents his efforts to lengthen his member through pumps, pills and myriad zany methods.



Now that he's made a film about his penis, the cat is pretty much out of the bag about its size. So how has that affected his dating life?

"Most girls don't think I have a penis at all at this point, so if they find out that I do, it's kind of like, you know, 'Oh, well look at that! It's actually there,'" he said. "It's like a homeless guy bringing you home to his mansion, like, 'Whoa, where did this come from?'"
__________________
Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 02-14-2014, 07:43 AM
WilliamJenningsBryan's Avatar
WilliamJenningsBryan WilliamJenningsBryan is offline
True Christian™
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Real American™ Gold Tither Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS TC Bravery Christian Love Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Nerd True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Home Schooled Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life True Republican Eats the Most Pork Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Prayer Warrior Early riser Touched by Jesus 

Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 6,109
WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

Something smells fishy about this story, starting with the feminazi. Women should know that if a tallywhacker can seed that's all that's important. Obama's self-indulgent welfare state has certainly gone a long way to contributing to this unrest.

There's no doubt that Patrick Moote is stroking this for all that it's worth, including making a movie about his alleged deficiencies. I frankly know of no True Christain™ male who has this problem - upstanding virile manly tallywhackers are a gift from Jesus, and Patrick Moote would do well to get on his knees and beg for mercy and Salvation® from Jesus rather than embarrassing himself.
__________________
Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 02-14-2014, 02:01 PM
Levi Jones's Avatar
Levi Jones Levi Jones is offline
Associate Pastor of Theology
God's Secret Weapon
Faint Not If You Are Rebuked By Him.
 

True Christian™ 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Ex-liberal True Christian Caucasian The Lord’s Witness Wound The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Gunfest '06 Tithing Manager Saved 1 Year Pastor of GOD One Year/1000 posts Senior Pastor Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth TC Bravery Gunfest '09 Tell her once Persecuted Mission to Las Vegas True Republican Super Soaker Baptism Award Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Punched the most queers 2010 Witch Hunt Award Pro-Life Outreach preacher Early riser Teabag Patriot Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Public Awareness Medal Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Hatchet Child Rearing Award Long service medal, 3rd class True Scientist™ True Christian Hotrodder Touched by Jesus Kirk Cameron Fan Club 

Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: With my nose stuck in the Bible.
Posts: 13,451
Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Levi Jones will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

If our society was pure this wouldn't be a problem. If a woman has never seen another one, there is no way to know it's small.

This has worked wonders in my marriage. Not that mine is small or anything.
__________________
Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

Contact me for private counseling. levijoneslbc@gmail.com



Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 02-14-2014, 05:38 PM
IHAVEREPENTED! IHAVEREPENTED! is offline
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: England
Posts: 2
IHAVEREPENTED! is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

even though what she said would have been very hurtful to that man you people do have a point and God obviously gave a small Ding-Dong for a reason so yeah...
__________________
My old name was DemonDeric but I have now repented on my sins and want to follow God. Please forgive me!
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 02-14-2014, 05:44 PM
Mary Etheldreda's Avatar
Mary Etheldreda Mary Etheldreda is offline
Gushing for Jesus
 

Protected by JESUS Christian Love Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture Cleanest Kitchen Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Persecuted Pro-Life Most Obedient Friend of Jesus True Christian Homemaker True Christian Beauty 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College True Republican Mother of 1 boy or 2.5 girls Quiverful Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls Super Soaker Baptism Award 3rd Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts True Christian Lady Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Tomato Staker Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Saved 1 Year Prayer Warrior The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking The Hatchet Child Rearing Award 4th Year Bible College Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion Babysitter 

Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 13,512
Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

Quote:
Originally Posted by IHAVEREPENTED! View Post
even though what she said would have been very hurtful to that man you people do have a point and God obviously gave a small Ding-Dong for a reason so yeah...
That goes without saying, don't you think? To assume God wouldn't do something with purpose in mind is to say everything can be explained by the laws of chance and probability, without sovereignty or purpose. Why, it would mean our world would be virtually indistinguishable from a world in which there is no God at all!

Besides, a True Christian™ woman knows the procreative act is meant to bring glory to God, not to enjoy Satan's disgusting gifts of orgasm.
__________________
.



Proud Quiver Full Mommy To Many

(Psalm 127:3-5)


Open Invitation To Atheists: 5 Reasons To Join the Church Repent, and join us today!
Reasons To Believe (1 Peter 3:15) Logical And practical answers to a common question
Autism - the New Gay Atheists conduct a nation-wide social experiment with children - Autism.
The Truth About New Atheism Why Atheism is a Religion, And New Atheism Is Evil
Collecting Recipes For Placenta: Fetal Bread Of Life Ladies, share your recipes here for the fetal "Bread Of Life" (John 6:35)
Does God Love Me? A Biblical explanation of who God loves!



Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 02-14-2014, 10:40 PM
Daisy Mae Johnson's Avatar
Daisy Mae Johnson Daisy Mae Johnson is offline
The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
Voted Best Pies in Freehold 9 Years Running
aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
 

Best Pie One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Christian Love Best Pie Long service medal, 2nd class Cleanest Kitchen Saved 5 Years Platinum Tither True Christian Lady Best Pie True Christian Homemaker Real American™ Mother of 1 boy or 2.5 girls The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ribfest '09 Daisy Home Schooled Best stoning bucket Heaven Bound The Lord’s Witness Wound Protected by JESUS Punched the most queers TC Bravery Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient Born again virgin Persecuted Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor In Love With Zeke Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Paula Deen Negro Support Group Touched by Jesus Babysitter 

Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
Posts: 13,822
Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

Pardon me Brothers for posting in your private section of the forum. But you can rest assure I haven't seen anything because I posted this with my eyes closed and a prayer in my heart.

This woman sounds like a whore. She must read dirty magazines, watch soft porn and touch herself. Why, how in the Heavens would she know about tallywhacker sizes?

That whore did him a favor. I bet she even buys frozen concentrate orange juice instead of squeezing it herself. She would have made a terrible wife.
__________________


Find me on FaceBook Here
Tweet me Here
My GODLY Bio Here


Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 02-15-2014, 05:20 AM
Godfly's Avatar
Godfly Godfly is offline
Descended from Rapes
True Christian™

True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Ex-Masturbator Protected by JESUS Real American™ Heaven Bound True Christian™ Christian Love TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Saved 1 Year One Year/1000 posts Tell her once Porn Resistant Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Teabag Patriot Persecuted Punched the most queers Sons of Liberty Super Soaker Baptism Award Persecuted Pro-Life True Republican Ready for the Rapture Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Truck Stop Ministry Member Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Jailed for JESUS Ex-rape victim 

Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold Bible Campground and RV Park.
Posts: 1,545
Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

How did she know how big his penis was if they weren't married yet? That's impossible.
__________________
Leviticus 13:40 And the man whose hair is fallen off his head, he is bald; yet is he clean.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 02-15-2014, 11:13 AM
WWJDnow's Avatar
WWJDnow WWJDnow is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

True Christian™ Christian Love 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Mission to Australia Saved 1 Year Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once One Year/1000 posts Porn Resistant Pro-Life Bronze Tither Eats the Most Pork Super Soaker Baptism Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus 

Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Godless New York City
Posts: 3,811
WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

If this fornicator's male member is too small, he should try prayer. I understand that the laying on of hands works wonders in this sort of thing. Remember, God wants every good Christian man to have the penis that he deserves!
__________________
The kinetic theory of gasses is ONLY a THEORY.

Teach the controversy!
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 02-15-2014, 12:35 PM
lukasekman's Avatar
lukasekman lukasekman is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ Ex-Masturbator True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Punched the most queers 

Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Forrest Park, Memphis
Posts: 570
lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.lukasekman is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

It's either too big or too small, satisfying the entitled generation is like filling the Grand Canyon with a water gun.
The only legitimate situation when a certain measurement is required is when conducting corrective rape, in which the Christian Commission on Human Rights (CCHR) have a large collection of data to ensure optimal conversion rates.
Obviously, the man isn't gay or asexual, so the possibility of penis retraction or atrophy from psychotropic drugs and hormones can be ruled out.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 03-05-2014, 03:36 AM
Witch Hammer's Avatar
Witch Hammer Witch Hammer is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

2010 Witch Hunt Award One Year/1000 posts 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Christian Provider™ award Pro-Life True Christian™ Friend of Jesus Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Porn Resistant Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Pro-Life True Republican Saved 5 Years Tell her once Christian Love The Lord’s Witness Wound Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Flat Earth Persecuted Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Punched the most queers Eats the Most Pork 

Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the midst of His Will®
Posts: 774
Witch Hammer is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Witch Hammer is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Witch Hammer is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Witch Hammer is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Witch Hammer is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Witch Hammer is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Witch Hammer is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Witch Hammer is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Witch Hammer is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Witch Hammer is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Witch Hammer is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

If True Christian™ men knew the horrors that awaited them on their wedding night, and each subsequent seeding thereafter, they might just risk an eternity of hellfire rather than shove their manhood into something that looks like the mouth of a rabid pitbull that has mercifully had its teeth pulled, and reeks like the beach at low tide.

That being said, it is only by God's grace that we can even achieve, much less maintain, turgidity in the face of such a ravening nightmare. I say blessed is he who has less to lose if the gaping maw snaps shut and devests him of his masculinity, and blessed is he who's stunted prong allows for a quick withdrawl before the beast can devour its prey.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 03-05-2014, 04:16 AM
WithGodWeStand WithGodWeStand is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Godless Wisconsin
Posts: 29
WithGodWeStand is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.WithGodWeStand is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Levi Jones View Post
If our society was pure this wouldn't be a problem. If a woman has never seen another one, there is no way to know it's small.

This has worked wonders in my marriage. Not that mine is small or anything.

Well said a very well endowed man will deliver his seed with ease. However the guys women who said no to his offer was not interested in his seed. She was just another satanic seed dumpster who is probably off to spread the aids or something. Who really cares what their length or whatever is everyone knows it about how fast you can deposit your seed and dispatch your wife to do more chores.
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 04-30-2014, 03:13 PM
rolledupboob's Avatar
rolledupboob rolledupboob is offline
Unsaved trash, suspected retard
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: In my mommy's closet.
Posts: 32
rolledupboob is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.rolledupboob is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.rolledupboob is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.rolledupboob is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.rolledupboob is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Feminazi Rejects Man Because His Tallywhacker is Tiny!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Witch Hammer View Post
If True Christian™ men knew the horrors that awaited them on their wedding night, and each subsequent seeding thereafter, they might just risk an eternity of hellfire rather than shove their manhood into something that looks like the mouth of a rabid pitbull that has mercifully had its teeth pulled, and reeks like the beach at low tide.

That being said, it is only by God's grace that we can even achieve, much less maintain, turgidity in the face of such a ravening nightmare. I say blessed is he who has less to lose if the gaping maw snaps shut and devests him of his masculinity, and blessed is he who's stunted prong allows for a quick withdrawl before the beast can devour its prey.
So you gay or something, seriously????
Cause straight men love women's *filthy pornographic word deleted*
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
marriage, movies, penis

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here

The information presented here is Biblically accurate. Opinions concerning the technical difficulties, fitness requirements, safety, and ratings of self-crucifixion, flagellation, stoning, destroying enemies of GOD utterly, without mercy, and other activities inherent in Christianity are subjective and may differ from yours or others' opinions; therefore be warned that you must exercise your own judgment as to the difficulty and your ability to safely protect yourself from the inherent risks and dangers. Do not use the information provided on this site unless you are a True Christian ™ who understands and accepts the risks of participating in these activities. Landover Baptist Church makes reasonable efforts to include accurate and up to date information on this website, errors or omissions sometimes occur, therefore the information contained on here is provided "as is" and without warranties of any kind either expressed or implied. Viewing, reading, or any other use of the information contained within this web site is purely the voluntary will of the viewer or user. You, 'the viewer' or 'user' shall not hold the publisher, owner, authors or other contributors of The Jesus Experience responsible for any incidents related directly or indirectly to the Experience. Landover Baptist Church, et. al., assumes no liability or responsibility for your actions.


All times are GMT. The time now is 09:39 AM.


Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1999, 2009 all rights reserved