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  #141  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:03 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alphonse Alban View Post
Well that is funny. So you have sense of humor after all.
Sexism≠ Funny

Sexism = sad excuse for having a tiny penis
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  #142  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:03 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishsucker View Post
Sexist Biatches take note on:
Ephesians 5:25-33
Colossians 3:19
Genesis 2:18, 20-24 < the rib bone represented equality between man and woman
Really? Let's see what it says:

Genesis 2:18 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.

Genesis 2:19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.

Genesis 2:20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.

Genesis 2:21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;

Genesis 2:22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

Genesis 2:23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.

Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

Hmmm, it doesn't mention equal ANYTHING. Weird, huh?

Yours in Christ,

Z. Smyth
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  #143  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:09 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zechariah Smyth View Post
Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
That pretty much means equal..
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  #144  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:10 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zechariah Smyth View Post
Really? Let's see what it says:

(Genesis 2:18-20) "And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him."

Hmmm, it doesn't mention equal ANYTHING. Weird, huh?

Yours in Christ,

Z. Smyth
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So are you saying that these scriptures magically cancel each other out?
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  #145  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:10 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishsucker View Post
Sexism≠ Funny

Sexism = sad excuse for having a tiny penis
Are you calling word of God sexist?

Ephesians 5:23-24 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.


By the way, using that very fresh "oh well, you have a tiny penis" argument is very sexist itself. Are there some issues you like to share with us?
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  #146  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:15 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alphonse Alban View Post
Are you calling word of God sexist?

Ephesians 5:23-24 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.


By the way, using that very fresh "oh well, you have a tiny penis" argument is very sexist itself. Are there some issues you like to share with us?
IDK but you may wanna sort out the problem with you 4 CM penis
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  #147  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:15 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by MyAmazingMonkeyGod View Post
That pretty much means equal..

"Cleave" in this case means to come together as one (as opposed to the "cleave" which means to cut apart). How can a single unit be equal? It takes two to be equal.

Use your noggin!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishsucker View Post
So are you saying that these scriptures magically cancel each other out?
Not sure what you are talking about. There are no discrepancies or errors or conflicts or etc. etc. in the Bible, so your question is patently ridiculous.

YiC,

Z. Smyth
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  #148  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:17 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishsucker View Post
IDK but you may wanna sort out the problem with you 4 CM penis
Aww. I'm sorry. I did not know you were that insecure.
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  #149  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:18 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishsucker View Post
IDK but you may wanna sort out the problem with you 4 CM penis
What is your fascination with tallywackers? Get your mind out of the gutter.



(Jude 1:7) "Even as Sodom and Gomorrha, and the cities about them in like manner, giving themselves over to fornication, and going after strange flesh, are set forth for an example, suffering the vengeance of eternal fire."

YiC,

Z. Smyth
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  #150  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:22 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

[QUOTE=Alphonse Alban;797395]Ephesians 5:23-24 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.


Now, where in the bible does it say that you can treat her like sh*t?
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  #151  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:28 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

[QUOTE=MyAmazingMonkeyGod;797403]
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alphonse Alban View Post
Ephesians 5:23-24 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.


Now, where in the bible does it say that you can treat her like (poop)?
Where has a True Christian™ specifically said he would treat his wife like poop?

And please don't confuse God's biblical instructions with your secular "morality" (sic).

YiC,

Z. Smyth
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  #152  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:30 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by MyAmazingMonkeyGod View Post
Now, where in the bible does it say that you can treat her like sh*t?
What are you talking about? You have really missed the point. Letting woman get out of her place would be treating her like shit. I want her to go to heaven. Husband is the head of the wife and wife will submit to her husband. If it were not so, it would be against the will of God and she would not be able to enter the heaven. That would be treating wife like shit.

Anyway, this is a Joke section. So if you do not posses thing called humor, then move along square, there is nothing for you to see here.
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  #153  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:35 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Here I have a hilarious joke

Funnyshit 1:25 Thou havth been a douche and Alphonse Alban Sucks Smyths Cock In hell
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  #154  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:38 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

So, you want her to go to heaven, so you make her do all the work while as you sit on your ass, drinking beers. Wow, you're sooooooooooooooo going to heaven with her.
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  #155  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:39 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishsucker View Post
Here I have a hilarious joke

Funnyshit 1:25 Thou havth been a douche and Alphonse Alban Sucks Smyths Cock In hell
I don't get it.



Are you going to put the funny part in a subsequent post?
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  #156  
Old 09-18-2011, 02:46 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Here I have more funny jokes:

Things men can't do


Scratch their ass

Make a sandwich

use the tv

be responsible

non laziness

drive a car

using their brain

Peeing on the toilet

keeping the house clean

being nice

I could post more but I'm a lazy bastard of a man like the rest of you
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  #157  
Old 09-18-2011, 03:00 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishsucker View Post
Here I have more funny jokes:

Things men can't do



Peeing on the toilet
I admit I've never tried to pee on the toilet, I just pee in it, but I think I could pee on it if I wanted to. That wouldn't be very nice of me to do to my wife though, since she'd have to clean up the mess.

Why do you hate women so much?
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  #158  
Old 09-18-2011, 03:04 AM
Zechariah Smyth's Avatar
Zechariah Smyth Zechariah Smyth is online now
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Enoch View Post
I admit I've never tried to pee on the toilet, I just pee in it, but I think I could pee on it if I wanted to. That wouldn't be very nice of me to do to my wife though, since she'd have to clean up the mess.

Why do you hate women so much?
Brother Enoch, I believe it's because the devil worshipers show their weakness around women, who in turn spurn them for their foppish ways, and that engenders a reactionary hatred of women in general.

Sad.



YiC,

Zech
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  #159  
Old 09-18-2011, 03:11 AM
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Default Re: Manly Jokes

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened by the time she brings it



If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong?

Made her chain too long
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Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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  #160  
Old 09-18-2011, 11:33 PM
a goth scum a goth scum is offline
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a goth scum is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.a goth scum is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.a goth scum is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Manly Jokes

What do you call a pig crossed with a woman : me
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