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Auntie Flo's Prayer Shack for Women For the women of Landover to discuss recipes, shoes, makeup tips, or whatever it is you natter about. Ensure you have the proper permission from your husband or father before posting.

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  #21  
Old 09-05-2007, 05:24 AM
Christiana Christiana is offline
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Christiana is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond View Post
In honor of Paris Hilton's conversion to Christianity (see Video proof of her True Christian? status HERE!) this year the gold, silver, bronze, and first runner-up prize for the Sunday School labor-day essay contest ("How the estate tax persecutes America's hard-working heirs") will be this $270 hot pink calfskin Bible.


Don't expect to be the next First Lady of the USA without it!

(The prize for winning boys will be the usual selection of sidearms).
Thank you Brother Jeb. I love the color pink. It is so female. When I see that color I just thank God that He created me a woman.
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  #22  
Old 09-05-2007, 07:51 AM
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Poison__x Poison__x is offline
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Poison__x is fearful, unbelieving, a liar, a whoremonger, and abominable. Has a place in the Lake of Fire secured.
Default Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
That football player sure seems to be going for the other one's balls *whistle*
And who doesn't like a nice, firm ass? ;p

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wash O'Hanley View Post
If I wanted to watch a bunch of half-naked Eurotrash kick a rubber ball around I would go to a Swedish live sex show- at least the seats wouldn't be so sticky.
Only someone of your stature would know what live Swedish sex shows are like, correct?
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  #23  
Old 09-05-2007, 01:18 PM
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
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Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Poison__x View Post
That football player sure seems to be going for the other one's balls *whistle*
And who doesn't like a nice, firm ass? ;p



Only someone of your stature would know what live Swedish sex shows are like, correct?
Get a haircut hippie!
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Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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  #24  
Old 09-05-2007, 02:06 PM
Pastor Isaac Peters's Avatar
Pastor Isaac Peters Pastor Isaac Peters is offline
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Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Poison__x View Post
And I don't care what Jesus thi... oh wait, he can't think, he's been dead for 2k years!
Jesus died and rose again. God temporarily sacrificed Himself to Himself to avert His own wrath. Can't you show just a little bit of gratitude to Him?
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  #25  
Old 09-22-2007, 08:00 PM
Trent Harvey, Jr.'s Avatar
Trent Harvey, Jr. Trent Harvey, Jr. is offline
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Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria View Post
Brother Trent, I think living in the safety and luxury of Baghdad has spoiled you! A tazer? Sure, if she wants to give some junkie hopped up on goofballs an electric tickle, or maybe it's good if the Iraqi poolboys momentarily forget their place. However, once you're back here in the Godly United States, you'll find the land crawling with lieberals, Demoncrats, nigras, feminazis, witches, and the Hellyweird elite!

It may not come in pretty colors, but I personally carry an anodized gray Beretta 3032 Tomcat Inox and it works plenty good!
You've got a point: while it's fun hearing loudmouthed college kids saying "don't tase me bro", there's a reason we have the National Rifle Assosiation and no the National Tazer Assosiation.

Here's some fashion accessories for the SERIOUS lady:



Here's the diamond I'll give when I propose:
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  #26  
Old 09-22-2007, 10:43 PM
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Talitha Talitha is offline
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Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
I saw the word Pink and somehow missed out on an interesting topic!

When it comes to protective accessories, Praise Jesus my personal designer comes up with only the best money can buy.
You never know when a Negra is going to come and try to rape you so I tend to be careful in these difficult times.

Name: TaliCroft.jpg Views: 141 Size: 51.9 KB
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The Landover Baptist Woman's Association (Landover Ladies)

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HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is, being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41


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  #27  
Old 09-22-2007, 11:44 PM
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Jeb Thurmond Jeb Thurmond is offline
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Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Talitha! I don't know which is worse: the disgustingly exposed bellybutton in that picture, or your attempt to deny the southward migration of your breasts using Hitoshi-quality photoshopping skills!

I'll forgive you this time, only because I know you ladies are all hyped up about Brother Trent's visit. I know how a scar and a few war stories tends to turn even the most modest of ladies into a drooling "victory girl".
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  #28  
Old 09-24-2007, 09:45 PM
Trent Harvey, Jr.'s Avatar
Trent Harvey, Jr. Trent Harvey, Jr. is offline
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Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.Trent Harvey, Jr. is veritably a saint destined for a place in heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond View Post
I know how a scar and a few war stories tends to turn even the most modest of ladies into a drooling "victory girl".
I have NO idea what you're talking about!

And her breasts are not droopy, they are tender, and if anything is to blame it's gravity.
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  #29  
Old 09-24-2007, 10:03 PM
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Talitha Talitha is offline
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Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trent Harvey, Jr. View Post
I have NO idea what you're talking about!

And her breasts are not droopy, they are tender, and if anything is to blame it's gravity.
Thank you Brother Trent, I'm pleased there is one Gentleman around here.

Brother Jeb, HOW DARE YOU talk about my Boobies in that manner
Being away from home for a few days is obviously having an effect on you.
By the way, the Sheep you had in the basement was a nice gesture and quite delicious too
Tell me, why was it dressed in that way? I've never seen one wearing high heels before, was that to help firm up the Leg meat? Seems to have worked.
Don't worry we saved you a little for your return.
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Sister Talitha

Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.

The Landover Baptist Woman's Association (Landover Ladies)

Campaign Against Women's Suffrage
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is, being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41


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  #30  
Old 09-25-2007, 01:20 AM
Jeb Thurmond's Avatar
Jeb Thurmond Jeb Thurmond is offline
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Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Get your "Paris Hilton" pink accessory Bible!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Talitha View Post
Brother Jeb, HOW DARE YOU talk about my Boobies in that manner
Being away from home for a few days is obviously having an effect on you.
Alright, I'll apologize for the boob comment. I guess after a long enough time in Thailand all American women seem flabby and pale by comparism. Some men say it's like the difference between a ripe pear and a melting vanilla ice cream cone, uh, and I think I'll just stop right there.
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