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Exclamation Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 04:43 AM

Sorry to be so fresh and blunt but I was deep in prayer and this came to me:

Women take note. If you ever feel pleasure while being intimate it is SATAN or his DEMONS causing the sensations!

Don't give into it. Don't let the pleasure sweep you away. You don't want to go to HELL for that do you?





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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 04:46 AM

That makes sense. Sex is for procreation, so experiencing feelings of pleasure is not neccessary to pop out some soldiers for Jesus. In fact, I don't think God would want women to have ogasms at all. After all, He cursed Eve by multiplying the woman's pain in childbirth, so popping out soldiers for Christ is supposed to be unpleasant. I'm sure He feels the same way about conception.

Have you found any more scripture in your 1611 King James Bible that backs this up further? I'm interested to hear!
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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 05:03 AM

How do you know that it isn't Jesus giving them the orgasms?


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Thumbs down Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 05:09 AM

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Originally Posted by Forest Spirit View Post
How do you know that it isn't Jesus giving them the orgasms?
cuz lord Jesus were a bootiful virgins, He not no the first thang abouts nawty sex stuff , so there!

i rebukes you for your dirty minds!
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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 05:24 AM

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Originally Posted by Forest Spirit View Post
How do you know that it isn't Jesus giving them the orgasms?
That blasphemy is absurd and offensive. Why would you treat the Lord God as some kind of sex toy for women to experience pleasure?
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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 05:30 AM

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Originally Posted by Halleluyah Rob View Post
That blasphemy is absurd and offensive. Why would you treat the Lord God as some kind of sex toy for women to experience pleasure?
Not to mention disgusting. There is a special place in HELL for those granola types.




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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 05:32 AM

Are you sure it's not just the Energizer bunny?

You're not going to let Pastor Ezekiel let you wait for ever, are you?


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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 06:02 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Petal View Post
cuz lord Jesus were a bootiful virgins, He not no the first thang abouts nawty sex stuff , so there!

i rebukes you for your dirty minds!

You are right precious Petal. JESUS never had a dirty mind. Only sinful, disgusting, HELLBOUND people do.




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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 06:09 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jacob11 View Post
That makes sense. Sex is for procreation, so experiencing feelings of pleasure is not neccessary to pop out some soldiers for Jesus. In fact, I don't think God would want women to have ogasms at all. After all, He cursed Eve by multiplying the woman's pain in childbirth, so popping out soldiers for Christ is supposed to be unpleasant. I'm sure He feels the same way about conception.

Have you found any more scripture in your 1611 King James Bible that backs this up further? I'm interested to hear!
1 Corinthians 7:1-5
<< 1 Corinthians 6 | 1 Corinthians 7 | 1 Corinthians 8 >>


7:1 Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” 2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. 3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.


PROOF Satan gives evangelical wives the big O





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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 08:08 AM

What is wrong with enjoying sex? It is a gift god has given us, is it not? shouldnt we take the liberty to enjoy what we have?
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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 08:15 AM

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Originally Posted by Respect View Post
What is wrong with enjoying sex? It is a gift god has given us, is it not? shouldnt we take the liberty to enjoy what we have?
i see where you are coming from, we were given sex, adam & eve enjoyed sex, did they not? the original humans, how have we differed so much since then that sex has become evil?
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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 08:45 AM

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Originally Posted by satanh8r View Post
i see where you are coming from, we were given sex, adam & eve enjoyed sex, did they not? the original humans, how have we differed so much since then that sex has become evil?
Sex always has been evil. Why do you think there is no mention of sex prior to the Fall of Man? And why Adam and Eve got no children when still in paradise?


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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 08:50 AM

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Sex always has been evil. Why do you think there is no mention of sex prior to the Fall of Man? And why Adam and Eve got no children when still in paradise?

The point remains that they were human.
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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 08:58 AM

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Originally Posted by Respect View Post
The point remains that they were human.
Yes, and as such we are easily tempted to do things that are bad four our soul. There is a reason hell has much more people than heaven. Satan's temptations are everywhere. Satan invented orgasms to lure woman into his trap and also to make woman seduce man to get them into hell as well.


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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 11:57 AM

You guys are missing something here. God made the female and must of thought she needed the bits that give her the orgasm or it wouldn't of put the bits in. So are you saying your god stuffed it up.

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Angry Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 11:59 AM

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Originally Posted by Max Light View Post
You guys are missing something here. God made the female and must of thought she needed the bits that give her the orgasm or it wouldn't of put the bits in. So are you saying your god stuffed it up.

Max
Why do these idiots come on a CHRISTAN website, refuse the read the FAQs and wonder why we could care less about them. They simply fail to realize........ wait for it........ they have demonstrated they could care less about us and like little babies, want to be the center of the universe and have us answer a question when we know them from, well, Adam.
Your first post is on the wrong thread.

Please read the Pastor's Rules and Announcements. Pay attention to the "noobs" thread. Then go post your introduction on the introduction forum.
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Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 01:56 PM

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Originally Posted by Max Light View Post
You guys are missing something here. God made the female and must of thought she needed the bits that give her the orgasm or it wouldn't of put the bits in. So are you saying your god stuffed it up.
Which part of "Satan invented orgasms" in the post directly above your own post was too hard to read? Idiot.


CANCER is a state of mind! Time to stop ALL healthcare!!!
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James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 01:58 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
Yes, and as such we are easily tempted to do things that are bad four our soul. There is a reason hell has much more people than heaven. Satan's temptations are everywhere. Satan invented orgasms to lure woman into his trap and also to make woman seduce man to get them into hell as well.
Temptation comes from Satan. When Eve bit into the apple, one of the things she learned was how to enjoy sex. GOD was smart and didn't want her to get away with free pleasures so he made her suffer in childbirth.
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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 03:53 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aristotle View Post
Temptation comes from Satan. When Eve bit into the apple, one of the things she learned was how to enjoy sex. GOD was smart and didn't want her to get away with free pleasures so he made her suffer in childbirth.
And then Satan invented condoms. We can only wait what will be God's next move in this spiritual war.


Sweet Lord Jesus,
I want to pray for those who persecute me, my Lord.
Please, treat their children as you treated those of Egypt, when they upset you! (Psalm 135:8-9)
Dash their little children against the stones for their fathers iniquity! (Psalm 137:8-9)
Hit them on the cheek, and smash out their teeth! (Psalm 3:7)
Make their death and descent into Hell swift and terrible! (Psalm 55:15)
Scatter their broken bodies over the streets of their evil cities, like Benghazi, Amsterdam, Tokyo and Mecca! (Psalm 110:6)
Praised be Your Glorious Name™.

Amen.

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Default Re: Only SATAN Gives Women Orgasms!!! - 01-22-2010, 04:24 PM

so no thought of this just being a natural bodily process? the feeling of reaching climax whilst making love? The Body does many strange things, I suffer from sleep paralysis, Tjat was once thought to be linked to demons, but science soon figured it out. All to do with the wonderful bio-mechanisms of the body. Good stuff!!
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