[BelieverInGod]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

Because you can't write with squares.

What are you talking about?

kitty shaped crayons


rock shaped crayons
Couldn't copy the image

crayons for the complete pervert


bug shaped crayons


Lego shaped (so much for your "can't draw with a square)


cupcake shaped


Triangular shaped


I was unable to copy the images of the egg shaped, the mushroom shaped, and a bunch of others. So no, there is absolutely no reason why crayons must be penis shaped.

[Proverbs]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

Because you can't write with squares.

[DamianC]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

When I was a kid I used to paint Jesus on the cross with my crayons on the walls. They used to beat me up in return because they told me it was no place to manifest my love for God.

Today I do the same on my neighbour's walls with pig blood to get them to understand that they can't live on my neighbourhood if they are not good Christians.

We never change.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

Children should learn about sodomy from their parents or their pastor.

Amen, Sister!

I understand Youth Pastor Marty used to give an in-depth course on the subject for the young lads. What happened to him, anyway?

[handmaiden]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

The concern over the morals and sensibilities of children and the need to keep crayons sharp are equally valid.

One point that I would like to make, however, is that while children must be safeguarded in their exposure to crayons and worldly influence, the male organ of generation is not, itself, inherently evil.

God made it and gave it to the favored sex, men, so that they could know their true worth and dominant position over the other sex.

God gave one to all the great patriarchs and gave humankind, through His Bible, a clear, but not explict and lust-encouraging, mandate for its use.

God also gave one to Jesus. And Jesus was perfect and without sin.

Many things in the natural world of God's creation are shaped similarly to the perfect appendage of Jesus. When God creates something really cool, He likes to repeat the theme with different variations.

Like certain animals-- He started making cats, had fun with it, and now we have big cats and little cats, striped cats and spotted ones. Then, He really got into the swing of stripes and spots and we have striped horses and spotted seals, you get the picture.

So, if God, in His great wisdom created asparagas and green beans and carrots and long finger toes on some people and penisulas, well, it is not my place to question Him.

Still, children must always only be introduced to certain things with care and Christian guidance. Carrots and green beans and Bible verses about swearing upon the thigh and the proper disposition of raped females and real estate claimed after wiping out entire cities in blood soaked battles should be shared with very young children by their families in proper homes-- or in church.

It is not up to big government to force crayons, condoms and other information about birth control and homosexuality on our children in school. Children should learn about sodomy from the parents or their pastor.

I cannot be any clearer on this important issue than that.

Concisely Yours,

Handmaiden

[Andrew Godwin13]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

Actually, believe it or not, I don't think black crayons should be changed to "African-American". African-American is a superior race of humanity, not a crayon color.

I do take an issue with one facet of the black crayon. I have noticed that Crayola has decided to cater to the Hispanic populace by making all crayons bilingual. This is a good thing. Everything in America should be bilingual so we can overcome the English-speaking hegemony that plagues America and keep our racial consciousness from being awakened. It is my understanding that black crayons are printed as "black" and underneath, "negro". I know that negro is the Spanish word for black, but it is also a racist anachronism that defeats the civil rights progress of African-Americans. School children are learning that "negro" is an acceptable word and it instills in them the tendency to commit hate crimes later in life.

I believe Crayola should change the Spanish word for black to something like the Spanish equivalent of "extremely dark" to change the consciousness of impressionable youth and catapult our civil rights movement into the 21st century.

Well what does a descendant of Ham like you know about anything?
If you a black, then your very genes are cursed! How could someone be a "superior race of humanity" if they are cursed?!

[SwordofCHRIST]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

I feel your pain brothers and sisters why I almost let an unclean word pass form my lips when I saw my neighbors son handling a summersquash at the church potluck. Of course my son will never see that depraved boy or his "parents" again. I should think brothers and sisters that god saw fit to give us the internet and keyboards that we may never have to defile our CHRISTian hands with a pencil or a pen....let alone a crayon.

[Buford T Scoggins]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

Crayons are the work of Satan. Or is it that you in fact are a paedophile who sees everything in life to be a falus because you like to stroke the Pony?

I don't know what pony you're talking about. Is that something like those donkey shows they got down in Tijuana?



yours in Christ,
Brother Buford

[Whip of Japheth]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

I believe Crayola should change the Spanish word for black to something like the Spanish equivalent of "extremely dark"

It does not exist mi tortillera puerca. Black is black. Negro es negro.

The end.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

Crayons are the work of Satan. Or is it that you in fact are a paedophile who sees everything in life to be a falus because you like to stroke the Pony?

Better to stroke a pony than to blow a colt.

[Pococuerno]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

That would explain the quality of the "architecture".

What does all this discussion of the joys of Canadian beaver have to do with the appalling design of perverse, pedophilia-encouraging crayons?

Crayons are the work of Satan. Or is it that you in fact are a paedophile who sees everything in life to be a falus because you like to stroke the Pony?

[Christiansoldier]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

That would explain the quality of the "architecture".

What does all this discussion of the joys of Canadian beaver have to do with the appalling design of perverse, pedophilia-encouraging crayons?

I was thinking about that as well.

Back on topic, I hope these homers stop influencing our children!

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

Beavers helped build Canada!

That would explain the quality of the "architecture".

What does all this discussion of the joys of Canadian beaver have to do with the appalling design of perverse, pedophilia-encouraging crayons?

[Christiansoldier]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

Well, you would need a big imagination to think of crayons as "Magic sticks".






Beavers helped build Canada!


Fur trading used to be a major industry in Canada, and beaver furs were the most valuable of all the furs.

It led the biggest fur trading business; Hudson Bay Company, to eventually become one of the largest banks in Canada today: "HSBC"

What beaver fur? You monsters!






Ha! Got ya! You though I was an eco-terrorist there didn't you!

Seriously speaking, it is nice to see that Canada had some balls and skinned those beavers for their fur! Do they still do this?

[Jenni111]

Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

are you serious?????

Well, you would need a big imagination to think of crayons as "Magic sticks".

I don't like beavers.

Beavers helped build Canada!


Fur trading used to be a major industry in Canada, and beaver furs were the most valuable of all the furs.

It led the biggest fur trading business; Hudson Bay Company, to eventually become one of the largest banks in Canada today: "HSBC"