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  • #61
    Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

    Originally posted by Proverbs View Post
    Because you can't write with squares.
    What are you talking about?

    kitty shaped crayons


    rock shaped crayons
    Couldn't copy the image

    crayons for the complete pervert


    bug shaped crayons


    Lego shaped (so much for your "can't draw with a square)


    cupcake shaped


    Triangular shaped


    I was unable to copy the images of the egg shaped, the mushroom shaped, and a bunch of others. So no, there is absolutely no reason why crayons must be penis shaped.
    Drama queen

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    • #62
      Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

      Originally posted by ironboy View Post
      The OP has obviously never seen a penis. I guess you guys had better keep your kids away from pencils, pens, flashlights, table legs, chair legs, carrots, cucumbers, pickles, bananas, oh and don't let them see the shifter in your car, all those object slightly resemble penises.
      And don't let the little kiddies handle a rifle, God knows where they may stick that!!!!

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      • #63
        Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

        Those homer crayons is why Jesus gets mad when he hears about local drives to give school supplies to kids from poor families. They are nothing but homer recruiting programs.
        Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

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        • #64
          Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

          I would like to see us melt down all the Crayons in the children's wing into something like this, but less faggy. Maybe we can mix all the colors together and create a sort of gray.

          Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.


          sigpic

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          • #65
            Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

            Originally posted by Levi Jones View Post
            Maybe we can mix all the colors together and create a sort of gray.

            Pardon me for saying this Brother, but that sounds about as fun as an old school marm.

            I vote for Biblical inspired colors.

            Slain-Savior Sanguine
            Canaanite Nigra Black

            Those two colors alone would suffice for a real work of art

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            • #66
              Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

              It is a disgusting travesty. No wonder so many people are going to hell.

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              • #67
                Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

                Originally posted by Sister Sally Bate View Post
                It is a disgusting travesty. No wonder so many people are going to hell.
                This is so true. It makes you wonder how many people Hell can hold. Must be crowded down there!
                Let Jesus Christ Wash You Clean
                in 2016

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                • #68
                  Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

                  Originally posted by VictoryOS View Post
                  This is so true. It makes you wonder how many people Hell can hold. Must be crowded down there!
                  That's why there is a stairway to heaven but a highway to hell. Only the pious folk make it up there. The rest BURN.

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                  • #69
                    Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

                    Originally posted by Sister Sally Bate View Post
                    It is a disgusting travesty. No wonder so many people are going to hell.
                    Oh, you know that, Sister! That is why so many volcanos have been going off lately. is positively overflowing with so many damned souls that it literally cannot contain them any more. Now they are SPEWING out into our atmosphere! That is also why there is such an uptick in crime and sin. Damned souls are roaming the Earth.
                    sigpic

                    Tweet me Here
                    My GODLY Bio Here

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                    • #70
                      Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

                      Sister Daisy, How frightening is that? I had no idea. It gives me shivers just thinking about it. Surely the time is near for the Return of our Beautiful Savior, Christ the Lord.
                      Let Jesus Christ Wash You Clean
                      in 2016

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                      • #71
                        Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

                        Originally posted by Jim C. Lombardo View Post
                        I vote for Biblical inspired colors.
                        Happily there is a competition with a lovely prize and still room for contributions, supported by Scripture please, HERE

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                        • #72
                          Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

                          In the interests of of keeping our hearts and minds on things that are near and dear to Jesus, I would like to caution all True Christians(tm) that some standard swivel-up lipsticks can be worn down from use into phallus-like shapes with a --ahem--blunted tip.


                          Interestingly, however, this does not happen all the time. Some women wear down their lipsticks into a flat, fairly sharp-edged shape. These, one can only assume, are decent-minded women who are not comfortable with blunt-tipped anythings near their mouths.


                          So, Brothers in Christ, if you are seeking a wife, take the opportunity to see how your prospective bride applies lipstick or lip balm and note carefully the sort of shape she wears the product down to. You will know to avoid the sort of female who carefully caresses her lip products into a blunted shape.


                          Now harkening back to the issue of crayon colors.


                          Originally posted by Eugene Hackwith View Post
                          I remember when there was the crayon color "flesh". I imagine it was very useful for coloring the skin of white people, but, of course, people whose skin color didn't coincide with the flesh crayon caused an uproar and the company changed the name.
                          The plain fact is that flesh and skin are really two different things. Human skin tones do differ depending on the sins of one's ancestors and the degree of God's favor.


                          However, human flesh, devoid of skin, is a remarkably consistent, rather lurid shade of pink-red when still pulsing with blood. After the drainage of such fluids, the color ranges more or less in tune with the shade of crayon formerly known as "flesh".* Therefore, no possible offense should be taken with that particular product designation.


                          Indian red is another former color name that has been discarded, and frankly, I feel that it was a misnomer based on lack of accurate observation. The skin tone of many so-called "Native Americans" is closer in hue to orange than out-right red. Therefore, a muted orange shade should have been designated as the color of choice when filling in cheerful scenes of Indians receiving the generous charity of warm, small-pox infested blankets and the like.


                          Also, it would take at least three different shades of Mulatto brown to do justice to coloring in charming pictures of the gracious antebellum South. But I suppose they could be named Mulatto, Quadroon and Octoroon.


                          Isn't precision a truly delightful thing? God was so careful in making His distinctions among all living things, when we do so, I am sure that it honors Him.


                          Demarcationingly Yours,


                          Handmaiden


                          * Don't ask.
                          His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

                          Guns For God and the Economy

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                          • #73
                            Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

                            Crayons have no place in the Sayne household! I still remember when George went to the store and came back with these:
                            God is about as real as unicorns and dragons.
                            Revelation 12:9
                            Job 39:9

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                            • #74
                              Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

                              Originally posted by Anne Sayne View Post
                              Crayons have no place in the Sayne household! I still remember when George went to the store and came back with these:
                              OK, so let's parse this trainwreck of thought:

                              1) Your husband brings home crayons, so obviously he wants crayons in his household.

                              2) You claim that crayons have no place in his household.

                              Just how are you showing obedience to his wishes, as the Bible says Jesus says you should?

                              After you're done trying to twist your way out of that, please read the thread again, and you'll notice (well, probably not, but giving the benefit of the doubt here) that NO ONE IS OBJECTING TO CRAYONS per se, just crayons shaped like penises.

                              Oh, and great job finding the yugest, blurriest pic possible. I'm sure that everyone just loooooves having to sidescroll constantly in order to read posts that now extend well off-screen, thanks to you.

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                              • #75
                                Re: Do Crayons Have to be Shaped Like a Penis?

                                They're CRAYANGLES, dydimis. Can't you read?
                                God is about as real as unicorns and dragons.
                                Revelation 12:9
                                Job 39:9

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