[Isabella White]

Re: Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage

I personally am 50 50 on the marriage deal, 50 says yes and 50 says no because I know what a divorce entails and I am not ready to deal with that.

Its bad enough when you break up but to have to mess with a judge,lawyers, etc just doesnt appeal to me in the least bit.

Well, my goodness gracious, Miss Pisk: It is high time, and ever so nice, that you have taken this opportunity to post your first message here, on . I note that you first joined us in August of 2019 and, yet, it's taken many months for you to share a bit of yourself with us. We're so delighted that you have done so, and we look forward to worshiping with you in the future, assuming you know the as your one and only .

Now, I do hope that you will not mind terribly in my asking you to make your way to our friendly Introduction Forum, where you can post a proper introductory message for us. (And not a moment too soon.) The link to that page is here:

https://www.landoverbaptist.net/forumdisplay.php?f=16

Please note our cordial request at the top of that page, which is:

The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

Thank you, Dear, and may bless you.

Sincerely, Isabella W.

[Carolopisk]

Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage

I personally am 50 50 on the marriage deal, 50 says yes and 50 says no because I know what a divorce entails and I am not ready to deal with that.

Its bad enough when you break up but to have to mess with a judge,lawyers, etc just doesnt appeal to me in the least bit.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage

***Pornographic video material removed***

Dear demon-spawned spammer,

Get your sorry ass over to The Introduction Forum and show us you have the courtesy to properly introduce yourself.

I thought you muzzies were big on courtesy?

[yasoooo]

Re: Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage

***Pornographic video material removed***

[Basilissa]

Re: Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage

Indeed! We don't want to infringe upon religious traditions, so long as they are the right kind of religion of course.

Exactly! Things like wearing a hijab, bleeding animals to death, or female circumcision are barbaric behaviors which should be outlawed, but things like aforementioned raping a woman (of any age) into marriage, or beating children to cast away stupidity (Proverbs 22:15), or shunning unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14-17), or slavery (Ephesians 6:5, Colossians 3:22, 1 Timothy 6:1), or bashing infidel babies' heads onto stones (Psalm 137:9) are sacred religious traditions which have to be protected by the state.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage

Praise Jesus! True Christians™ in states all over the country are rejecting liberal pushes to secularize marriage.

A woman from Florida has claimed she was forced to marry her rapist at age 11.

Sherry Johnson says she was raped four times by members of her family’s church congregation as a child. As a result, she became pregnant at age 10.

When investigators began looking into her case, she claims her family tried to protect her rapist by forcing her to marry him.

“My mom asked me if I wanted to get married, and I said, ‘I don’t know, what is marriage, how do I act like a wife?’” Ms Johnson told The New York Times. “She said, ‘Well, I guess you’re just going to get married.’”

Florida is one of 27 US states that permits children of any age to be married with their parents’ permission.

Marrying off one's defiled daughter is perfectly Biblical, and is God's Perfect Plan for the victim-child:

If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found;
Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days.
Deuteronomy 22:28-29

Both Ms Stafford’s legislation and a matching Senate bill [to outlaw child marriages] died in committee. A similar law was shot down by the New Hampshire state legislature this year.

Just this month, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie vetoed a law that would have outlawed child marriage without exception.

“An exclusion without exceptions would violate the cultures and traditions of some communities in New Jersey based on religious traditions,” Mr Christie said in a statement.

Indeed! We don't want to infringe upon religious traditions, so long as they are the right kind of religion of course.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage

I... Um....

That sounds very agreeable.


Yes indeedy.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage

I am weeping right now. Weeping because the greatest mistake I ever made was having premarital sex, and this is something I can never undo.

I can see your dear heart is in the right place, friend. I prayed about you, and I feel the Holy Ghost wants me to confirm for you the message that Jesus can redeem your offense, so don't lose hope! You are a child of the King (2 Corinthians 6:18)! A chosen heir to the throne of Heaven (Romans 8:17)! You are a new creation in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17), and that icky, old creation, the one that enjoyed sex outside the construct of a practical, seed-bearing marriage, is dead and gone, crucified and redeemed (Romans 6:6)! Glory!

You can redeem yourself by raising up a new generation of Faithful True Christians™! The Ladies of Landover have begun discussion on bringing like-minded believers to the area for a Very Special Conference. This conference will have all kinds of sermons and self-help talks and inspirational talks and workshops for adults and youths for the purpose of answering any last minute questions, and to purchase quality wedding paraphernalia from our dear sponsors.

At the culmination of this conference, where we expect to see the LORD work some Mighty Works, we will offer marital contracts between fathers, and in cases like yours where you are old enough to be a father, then between you and the father of the bride. These contracts will solidify a True Christian™ match between two consenting fathers (or in cases where the husband is old enough to find his own bride, between husband and father-of-the-bride). Weddings may be scheduled through the Front Office, and a meeting with the financial department of Landover Baptist Church will finalize the wedding fees, and tithing schedules. Once you've found a man who is pleased with you as a prospect for his young virgin daughter, you can find redemption in raising a new generation of Christians who wouldn't dare dream of touching another person outside the confines of holy matrimony, from your new bride, to her many children.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage

I am weeping right now. Weeping because the greatest mistake I ever made was having premarital sex, and this is something I can never undo.

[Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson]

Re: Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage

Sister Mary, with your permission, I'm going to copy this and submit this for approval for the Ladies' Church Magazine. This is a wonderful guide and I will be using this within hopefully a decade, when my young sons are old enough for brides!

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage



Many Ladies' Clubs of false Churches only concentrate on idle gossip and ornamentation, but this shows the World how our Landover Ladies spend their leisure time doing the Lord's Work! This is a pivotal breakthrough in Salvational Issues as it shows countless young women how and only how they can secure a place at Jesus' feet in Heaven!

1 Timothy 2:15
Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.

Let us pray that as many young virgins as possible hasten through the necessary steps of betrothal and nuptials as soon as possible and that their marital fornications prove to be fecund! Time is running out and the nine months of conventional gravidity may be interrupted any moment by the Second Coming. Of course, we can also pray that Jesus reduces the usual duration of pregnancy for True Christians™ to maximise the Heavenly Harvest of souls this close to the Rapture (1 Thessalonians 4:17).


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Alvin Moss]

Re: Landover Baptist Church Guidebook for Betrothal and Marriage

Sister, this is powerful testimony. This should be printed up in the form of a booklet and sent to every newlywed couple, all students on their tenth birthday, all immigrants and all inmates when they are released from prison. It should be on every airliner, train and bus in the country and it should be a part of the curriculum of every school in America. Thank you for this milestone in Christian thought. Praise God!

[Mary Etheldreda]

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

In years past, sinners were ashamed of their choices and practiced their rebellion against God in dark closets while Christians were the mainstay of America. Today the opposite is true. Sinners march in parades, children are encourage to sin proudly and often, and each member of society decides for himself what is right and what is wrong. The thing is, people want answers, they want hope, but they are afraid the solutions aren't tenable in today's society.
We understand this advice seems to go against the grain of a modern world. It goes against modern philosophy, redefines compassion, and eschews the latest so-called "scientific research." But then, so does the Bible. God doesn't require science to agree with His Word, but we know from countless examples of research, honest, unbiased, Biblically sound science always corroborates what the Bible already says. For those who are ready to embrace Biblical Marriage, we share the most Frequently Asked Questions:

Marriage isn't just a quaint tradition. It's more than a reason for family to get together and enjoy each other's company. It's the cornerstone of society, just as Christ is the cornerstone of Zion. It is the only foundation of hope for escaping the wrath to come (Isaiah 28:16).

We here at Landover Baptist Church are happy to answer any personal questions about Biblical Marriage, and to help encourage people to stand strong in the faith by trusting and following God's Word.

[Mary Etheldreda]

THE PROBLEM WITH "GAY MARRIAGE"

Each generation is becoming more Godless, and the biggest culprits to thank in this War on Morality is the Gays. In Gay "Marriage" there are no virgins (actual or honorary), no incest, no illicit or licit sex, no merging of families, no creation of a new lineage. There's just the satisfaction of lust, power, control, and shattered self-esteem.

The Bible reveals the basic institution of society is the family. Moses records no law of treason against the state. The Bible doesn't state, imply, or even imagine anything remotely like that. Instead, several of the death penalties are associated with the family and its life.

Adultery and homerism are two criminal acts worthy of capital punishment. Adultery denies the groom decent offspring from a pure mother, and publicly accuses the father of raising a skanky whore. Homerism is really, really gross, and God hates that (Leviticus 18:22). These things contribute to the breakdown of society faster than famine or pestilence. The serious Bible scholar will note the LORD gave a solution to the Gay Problem (Leviticus 20:13), but did not give a solution to avoiding leishmaniasis. The only conclusion one can safely draw is that God deems homosexuality to be a greater threat to mankind than leishmaniasis.

Homers want you to think their relationships are fine as long as they are based on mutual respect. That means if two homers want to share a lifetime together raising tropical plants and watching musicals, they should be left alone to do so. Consequently, if two homers agree to meet at some highway truckstop bathroom through Craigslist, engage in anonymous, rapid, aggressive anal assault, that's just fine and dandy, too.

There is no way one can even remotely pretend that two or more hyper-sexualized men, grunting and thrusting angrily at the exposed anus, could be an allegory for Christ and His Bride (Revelation 19:7-9). To suggest such a thing is Blasphemy, and disgusting. There isn't enough brain bleach in the world to erase the picture of Christ like that.

There is a spiritual arms race in the world, as Satan has pitted himself against the LORD for the acquisition of souls. While Satan will lose control ultimately, he will win control of most souls created in the womb (Matthew 22:14). This is a tragedy, and anyone with any compassion would agree that with great power comes great responsibility. True Christians™ are powerful in the Spirit (Mark 16:17), and are also blessed with enormously fecundity. We need to encourage our youths to be responsible with their God-given gifts, and win the Spiritual Arms Race against Satan. We cannot stand by as the Muslim, who are also alarmingly fertile, repopulate the earth.

Homosexuals are forcing Jesus to watch them have anal sex. The fact is, people not only demand to have gay sex a any time and in any place, they nag others about the superiority of homosexuality with a passion rivaled only by vegans. The Gay Agenda has successfully infiltrated the minds and hearts of churches all across this nation and have convinced members to embrace the widespread grabbing of ankles all over America.

True Christians™ can stop this number in its tracks by training their children to Just Say No to Homosexuality, and to produce more Christian Soldiers for Christ each year than public schools produce gays and gay sympathizers.

[Mary Etheldreda]

THE PROBLEM WITH BIRTH CONTROL

Avid Bible students will recognize that nowhere in God's Holy Word is birth control encouraged, but everywhere fertility is. The only reason given for abstinence in marriage is prayer and fasting (I Corinthians 7:3-5), or to avoid a woman's unclean time (Leviticus 18:19), never to avoid children. Disciples of the LORD will understand the Parable of the Talents in Matthew 25:14-30 includes smart investment in the womb.

Limiting one's family size is selfish in many ways.

• It deprives a man of a full quiver, through which the LORD blesses him (Psalm 127:5)
• It deprives a society the gift of a sizeable percentage of True Christians™, forcing people to suffer under the rule and social pressures of immoral leaders
• It deprives Jesus souls to help populate Heaven

Remember, in Heaven there will be no marriages (Matthew 22:30), so no babies. The moment Jesus returns, the number of souls born on earth, from the days of Adam and Eve, will come to a stop. Imagine spending an eternity in Heaven knowing everyone there infinitely well. There will come a day when you will have met and gotten to know everyone. There will be no one to do things for the first time with. Stretch that inevitable time out, every last soul now counts!

People who advocate birth control are the same people who advocate higher education, feminism, evolution, and the Gay Agenda. To succumb to their immoral ways is to promote a society in which the gays literally take every civil right away from God fearing men and women, and mandatory public school will teach and grade children on increasingly perverted homosexual techniques. They won't stop until every child is addicted to sex and abortions (having and providing them).

To limit the size of the True Christian™ family is to reject the Sovereignty and Trustworthiness of the LORD (Psalm 19:7). It is to tell Jesus that while you love Him, you don't *really* love Him (John 14:15), and that your offer to be a perfect place where He stores and operates His Ghost (1 Corinthians 6:19) is not genuine (Matthew 21:28-32). It is to say you've been persuaded by modern arguments that promote health and wellness, economic stability, bodily autonomy, education, and things that will be of no consequence in Heaven.