Homers, Lezbeans, Adoption, and Thyme

[Old Man Hatchet]

I support the right of same-gender couples to adopt children. You read that right.

Think about it. Gays and lesbians only get leftovers--specifically, Negro, Puerto Rican, and retarded children. Remember: It is a fact that children who are raised by queers become queers themselves. The above three groups are better off gay. Virtually all Negroes and Puerto Ricans are sex-crazed animals. Barack HUSSEIN Obama cannot even pose with his wife without trying to get it on.



Now, if blacks and Puerto Ricans are queer, they will be trying to rape my backside instead of white women. You are surely thinking: "Hold on, Mr. Hatchet. You want to be raped by gay minorities?" Of course not*. Under such circumstances, I will have a lawful reason to beat the tar** out of homosexuals, and the fact that they'll be colored and/or Puerto Rican is a bonus. Also, if they're gay--retards included***--they can't produce.

I do NOT support gays and lesbians becoming parents through donor insemination and surrogacy--mainly because I don't know what those words mean. I tried looking them up but was forced to stop reading after encountering the phrase "thawed or freshly ejaculated sperm" as well as a picture of this man:




*Not since my experimental phase in college.

**Literally if they're smokers.

***A moot point since retards can't figure out how to reproduce anyway.

[JennyD]

Re: Homer and Lezbean Adoption

Brother Hatchet, are you suggesting that we should campaign in Arkansas to overturn their no-sodomite-adoption law?

I thought we wanted to protect the children . . .

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: Homer and Lezbean Adoption

Brother Hatchet, are you suggesting that we should campaign in Arkansas to overturn their no-sodomite-adoption law?

I thought we wanted to protect the children . . .

Of course we want to protect the children, but it's a matter of which children. Am I wrong in my assumption that straight couples get first pick and consequently all the homers and lezbeans have to pick from are undesirables--namely, non-white and addle-brained children? Of course not! I'm never wrong.

[GodsCreation]

Re: Homer and Lezbean Adoption

You're all so piffleing lame to listen to.
It's not a fact that if you're a homo and raise a child, the child will become a homosexual actually there's investigations that proves the opposite.

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: Homer and Lezbean Adoption

You're all so piffleing lame to listen to.
It's not a fact that if you're a homo and raise a child, the child will become a homosexual actually there's investigations that proves the opposite.

You're not going to convince anyone if you don't back up your argument. Provide proof of these "investigations." And don't bother retorting that I'm a hypocrite because I didn't provide any proof. The fact that I said it is proof enough.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Homer and Lezbean Adoption

When I saw the title of this thread, I thought "Why would anyone want to adopt a homersexual or lezbean baby! That's just sick!" But after I read Mr. Hatchett's wise words, I agreed with him as usual.

And Jenny, all we would need would be a law that said homers and lezbeans could ONLY get undesirable babies, or that they could only get a specific baby after a certain number of married white couples had passed them over.

It's better than my tax dollars being spent to keep them in an orphanage or in the foster carer system. Let some homer couple pay to raise a few retarded minority babies instead of me!

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Homer and Lezbean Adoption

Now, if blacks and Puerto Ricans are queer, they will be trying to rape my backside instead of white women. You are surely thinking: "Hold on, Mr. Hatchet. You want to be raped by gay minorities?" Of course not*. Under such circumstances, I will have a lawful reason to beat the tar** out of homosexuals, and the fact that they'll be colored and/or Puerto Rican is a bonus. Also, if they're gay--retards included***--they can't produce.

While I agree with you here on this Brother Hatchet I feel firmly that gays should not marry. Adopt, and raise hellbound families, marriage no. The only reason gays want to get married is to destroy the institution of marriage.

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: Homer and Lezbean Adoption

When I saw the title of this thread, I thought "Why would anyone want to adopt a homersexual or lezbean baby! That's just sick!" But after I read Mr. Hatchett's wise words, I agreed with him as usual.

I have changed the thread title to avoid further confusion, Captain Portway. I was going to give you an infraction for misspelling my name, but you did so while paying me a compliment. Just when you thought I couldn't possibly be any more Christlike, I have decided to turn the other cheek.

While I agree with you here on this Brother Hatchet I feel firmly that gays should not marry.

Agreed. I firmly feel gays should not marry*.


*During my experimental phase in college, it was just "I firmly feel gays."

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Homer and Lezbean Adoption

I have changed the thread title to avoid further confusion, Captain Portway. I was going to give you an infraction for misspelling my name, but you did so while paying me a compliment. Just when you thought I couldn't possibly be any more Christlike, I have decided to turn the other cheek.

Truly sir, I did not think it was possible for you to be more like our Lord Jesus than you were yesterday, but once again your graciousness has proven me wrong. Praise!

And may God forgive me for that offensive extra 't'. It was a typo, but the Lord surely hates typos as much as not understanding how to spell. For typos are a sign of slothfulness, which the Lord teaches us is as bad as being stupid:


I went by the field of the slothful, and by the vineyard of the man void of understanding;

And, lo, it was all grown over with thorns, and nettles had covered the face thereof, and the stone wall thereof was broken down.

Then I saw, and considered it well: I looked upon it, and received instruction.
Proverbs 24:30-32

[Jimmy-Roy Stewart]

Re: Homers, Lezbeans, Adoption, and Thyme

Cool now when the kids get bratty instead of just tjhreatening them with teh belt i can also tell them im' going to send them to live with a homo family if they dont' believe me ill' tell them mr. hatchet said so.

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: Homers, Lezbeans, Adoption, and Thyme

Cool now when the kids get bratty instead of just tjhreatening them with teh belt i can also tell them im' going to send them to live with a homo family if they dont' believe me ill' tell them mr. hatchet said so.

You're a wonderful father. America needs more like you.

[Jimmy-Roy Stewart]

Re: Homers, Lezbeans, Adoption, and Thyme

You're a wonderful father. America needs more like you.

Thank you mr. Hatchet your too kind sir.