[Ahimaaz Smith]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

This, Sister, is where I have the most trouble. While I am well aware that Jesus himself warned his followers that they were likely to face a certain amount of hostility, I really can't imagine why we still do some 2,000 years later.

The Devil is still out there.

All I have left is $20 in my pocket to buy food to feed my children. Once that's spent, I am stuck with no way out short of declaring myself bankrupt... Surely the Church doesn't expect me to hand that over that $20 and leave my children to starve?

Yes, we do. Remember Luke 21 1:4:

And he looked up, and saw the rich men casting their gifts into the treasury. And he saw also a certain poor widow casting in thither two mites. And he said, Of a truth I say unto you, that this poor widow hath cast in more than they all: For all these have of their abundance cast in unto the offerings of God: but she of her penury hath cast in all the living that she had.

[Wide-Open]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

Surely the Church doesn't expect me to hand that over that $20 and leave my children to starve?

Friend, your previous "donation" has cost us $1,534.87-, which we had to pay to our Joo lawyers - who check to verify if the money that came in was "ligit".

And it's not NET income, it's GROSS income.

You are robbing Jesus (if we were to believe you) of $2.00 (if that is indeed your gross income)

You belong to God, your children belong to God, and the fact that you are not able to give them a decent education (a.k.a.: homeschooling) is not His problem. Get off your lazy bum and find a real job, just like the rest of us.

Jesus doesn't care if you have dodgy dealings with jiggaboos: He needs new shoes. End of.

PS: you can pay the invoice we'll send you spread over 3 months, if that helps.

[Talitha]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

I'm up to my eyeballs in debt as it is, Sister. I've got the bank on the phone to me every day and bailiffs knocking on my door every week.

If I were to give the Church 10% of my net worth, the Church would wind up owing the bank tens of thousands of dollars - and as far as I am aware, most churches are ill equipped to deal with such a financial burden. Private jets don't run themselves.

All I have left is $20 in my pocket to buy food to feed my children. Once that's spent, I am stuck with no way out short of declaring myself bankrupt, losing my home and wandering the streets as a homeless bum, getting drunk on methylated spirits and shouting incoherently at people that aren't there. This is why I'm hoping this Nigerian chap delivers the goods - he's my last hope.

Surely the Church doesn't expect me to hand that over that $20 and leave my children to starve?

With the rate of the $ presently worth 69 of your British Pee I make that a grand total of £13.82.
I understand Pot Noodle is a good stand-by in your country.
That leaves Ten Shiny English Pounds for Jesus.

Which comes first Jamesy? Your Children's Immortal Soul or a trip to Tesco for a quick fix?

[Just James]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

I'm up to my eyeballs in debt as it is, Sister. I've got the bank on the phone to me every day and bailiffs knocking on my door every week.

If I were to give the Church 10% of my net worth, the Church would wind up owing the bank tens of thousands of dollars - and as far as I am aware, most churches are ill equipped to deal with such a financial burden. Private jets don't run themselves.

All I have left is $20 in my pocket to buy food to feed my children. Once that's spent, I am stuck with no way out short of declaring myself bankrupt, losing my home and wandering the streets as a homeless bum, getting drunk on methylated spirits and shouting incoherently at people that aren't there. This is why I'm hoping this Nigerian chap delivers the goods - he's my last hope.

Surely the Church doesn't expect me to hand that over that $20 and leave my children to starve?

[Talitha]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

Very possibly I would, Sister, however I fear the intention may be misunderstood.

I am in discussion with a nice Nigerian gentleman right now and I need every penny I can spare to help him get some money out of his country. He has promised to pay me handsomely - far more than I could ever spend - and it was my intention to tithe any excess to the church.

I didn't say anything earlier because this gentleman swore me to secrecy - the only reason I'm explaining this now is I know that as True Christians ™ you'll understand.

We take payment by Credit Card.
You can always pay off the Card when the Nigerian pays you all of that money.

[Just James]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

Very possibly I would, Sister, however I fear the intention may be misunderstood.

I am in discussion with a nice Nigerian gentleman right now and I need every penny I can spare to help him get some money out of his country. He has promised to pay me handsomely - far more than I could ever spend - and it was my intention to tithe any excess to the church.

I didn't say anything earlier because this gentleman swore me to secrecy - the only reason I'm explaining this now is I know that as True Christians (TM) you'll understand.

[Talitha]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

This, Sister, is where I have the most trouble. While I am well aware that Jesus himself warned his followers that they were likely to face a certain amount of hostility, I really can't imagine why we still do some 2,000 years later. You certainly don't see anyone in the Church harping on about things that happened 2,000 years ago - let bygones be bygones and all that.

It seems a terrible shame that so many people are so blinded by their hatred that they cannot let Jesus into their lives.

Unfortunately they have never felt the euphoria of getting caught by the love of Jesus.
Some folk even come in here thinking they can get away with only making a Loving Donation of $0.01 and thinking Jesus wouldn't know about it.
$0.01 wouldn't even be enough to buy Jesus a new pair of Sandals, even if they were made in a foreign country using child labor.
Let me tell you, Jim; we take a very dim view of those that come here just to persecute True Christians(tm).

You wouldn't do those things to us would you Jim?

[Just James]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

James, can you blame us for having our suspicions about newcomers to our place of Worship?
There are those out there on the Internets who would try and bring us down or are just here to persecute us.
I hope you prove yourself to be worthy of The Truth.

This, Sister, is where I have the most trouble. While I am well aware that Jesus himself warned his followers that they were likely to face a certain amount of hostility, I really can't imagine why we still do some 2,000 years later. You certainly don't see anyone in the Church harping on about things that happened 2,000 years ago - let bygones be bygones and all that.

It seems a terrible shame that so many people are so blinded by their hatred that they cannot let Jesus into their lives.

[Talitha]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

James, can you blame us for having our suspicions about newcomers to our place of Worship?
There are those out there on the Internets who would try and bring us down or are just here to persecute us.
I hope you prove yourself to be worthy of The Truth.

[Just James]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

Was that question aimed at me, Brother King?

I have, however it seems there are some who doubt me - even amongst the senior members of the Church. This is a source of terrible pain, but we all have our crosses to bear. Praise Jesus!

[Nobar King]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

Have you denounced your atheist ways and decided to dedicate yourself to Our Lord?

[William Snodgrass]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

That's why they have all them secret meetings and speak in their secret code language to each other. America would riot if they knew what the Catlicks were up to!

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

So it was God's will for young boys to be raped by priests? Or were they disgusting, heathen altar boys who needed punishment before they could achieve salvation?
As well, if that's the case, then sodomy seems to be a path to salvation! Thanks for clearing that up!

That's what SATAN wants you to think. That's why he invented the CAT LICK CHURCH! A den of homers presided over by Ratsinger the Nazi. A nasty bit of work goes on in the Vatican AKA The Gates of Hell!

[chris pooch]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

welcome to the group Brother Ralph.............everything is God's will.

So it was God's will for young boys to be raped by priests? Or were they disgusting, heathen altar boys who needed punishment before they could achieve salvation?
As well, if that's the case, then sodomy seems to be a path to salvation! Thanks for clearing that up!

[Chupa Pito]

Re: I think I'm beginning to understand

Praise Brother! You're finally learning something! Nothing happens in this World unless it is by the Will of God!

Why did the Tsunami kill all those people?? Because God sent it - presumably to punish all those perverts and heathens in Thailand, for allowing sick fat pedophile buisiness men travel to their Country for the purposes of fornicating with young asian children! Praise Jesus!

Why did those Towel-heads fly those planes into the Twin Towers? Because God made them do it - probably to punish all the sick AIDS-infested sodomites in Manhattan for their evil and degenerate death-style! Shout Glory!

Why did my mommy get Cancer, and die??? Because God wanted her dead! To be honest, kid, she was probably a whore anyway. Good riddance to another Godless piece of garbage! Praise!

The answer to all these questions, and more, is a simple one. It was God's Will! Who are WE to question his Divine Judgement? Glory to God!

Amos 3:6 "Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?"

Romans 1:18 "For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who hold the truth in unrighteousness"

Praise!

welcome to the group Brother Ralph.............everything is God's will.