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  • The Rev. Dwight Williams
    True Christian™ and Honorary White Man
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 77

    #1

    Warm saluterations to my brothers and sisters at Landover!

    Hello Landover!

    It seems every time I come back to visit my beloved Landoverian brothers and sisters, another ill has befallen you at the hands of lesbianic, Jewish and Wiccan hackers who necessiterate another registeration.

    But the fact that this message board still stands is testament to the power of your resiliencies and the majestic tithing of Landover's congremegation!

    It's good to be back!
    Pastor and CEO, Shatter Creek Baptist Church.
  • MoonFlower
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 522

    #2
    Welcome back Rev!
    You pray...I dance naked in the forest

    Comment

    • Andreas
      Unsaved Atheist Nazi Trash
       
      • Sep 2006
      • 249

      #3
      Yay, yay, whoever you are
      Soon in Christ

      Comment

      • Pastor Ezekiel
        Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
         
        • Sep 2006
        • 78552

        #4
        Originally posted by The Rev. Dwight Williams View Post
        Hello Landover!

        It seems every time I come back to visit my beloved Landoverian brothers and sisters, another ill has befallen you at the hands of lesbianic, Jewish and Wiccan hackers who necessiterate another registeration.

        But the fact that this message board still stands is testament to the power of your resiliencies and the majestic tithing of Landover's congremegation!

        It's good to be back!
        Well Praise Jesus, and look what the cat dragged in! It is good to see my favorite ex-nigra back amongst True Christians once again.

        While it is true that we are persecuted on a daily basis by jews and lesbionic hooligans, their hatred only serves to strengthen our resolve to carry on with God's work. As the Holy Bible states, we are actually blessed by Jesus each time they spew their demonic filth our way.

        Matthew 5:10 Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
        5:11 Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.
        5:12 Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you.


        On a more presonal note; are the catfish bitin' down there in Possum Creek? I'm of a mind to send a couple of my hired boys down there to catch some and have Sister Thumper fry them up for me.....
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

        Comment

        • Bobby-Joe
          Landover Security Superviser
          Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert
          NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
          True Christian™
          • Sep 2006
          • 18405

          #5
          Originally posted by andrewisI View Post
          Yay, yay, whoever you are
          Really Andrew, don't you know the good Reverend Williams was pastor how came up with the EZ Tithe offering credit card reader?

          Welcome back Reverend.

          Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

          Hot Must ReadThreads!


          Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

          Comment

          • Cueball
            Unsaved trash
             
            • Sep 2006
            • 30

            #6
            Hello Reverend Williams.

            I had joined the previous Landover Baptist forum about a week before it went down, so I don't have any memory of you... But having said that much, it's nice to meet you. What Bobby-Joe said about you creating the EZ Tithe offering credit card reader is amazing!
            "If a minister believes and teaches evilution, he is a stinking skunk, a hypocrite, and a liar."

            - W. A. "Billy" Sunday, 1925.

            Comment

            • The Rev. Dwight Williams
              True Christian™ and Honorary White Man
              True Christian™
              • Sep 2006
              • 77

              #7
              Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post

              On a more presonal note; are the catfish bitin' down there in Possum Creek? I'm of a mind to send a couple of my hired boys down there to catch some and have Sister Thumper fry them up for me.....
              The catfish are a bitin' and as scrumpterous as always, Pastor, although you know I'm a Fried Wiccan man myself. Nothing beats the taste of a lightly seasoned heathen fresh off the grill! We should schedule another famous Baptist Barbecue to get the youngins acquainticized with how we do things.


              Originally posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
              Really Andrew, don't you know the good Reverend Williams was pastor how came up with the EZ Tithe offering credit card reader?

              Welcome back Reverend.
              Ah, the EZ Tithe and the Tithemaster 5000, which paved the way for the "Mercedes Is Faster for Your Pastor" fundraiser. Those were the days.

              Hello, Cueball, glad to see you've joined the congremegation
              Pastor and CEO, Shatter Creek Baptist Church.

              Comment

              • Andreas
                Unsaved Atheist Nazi Trash
                 
                • Sep 2006
                • 249

                #8
                Really Andrew, don't you know the good Reverend Williams was pastor how came up with the EZ Tithe offering credit card reader?

                Welcome back Reverend.
                My case is similar to Petal's. I never had the chance to meet our godly inventor-pastor.

                I'm sorry if I offended you, reverend Williams.

                Yours in Christ
                Soon in Christ

                Comment

                • SUV
                  True Christian™ Princess
                  The Driving Force behind RA12
                  Have at it, anytime!
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 11027

                  #9
                  Have you yet met Landover's own Remy LeBeau, who is "White by Marriage" and if so, what sort of Caucasian doings have you Boys been up to?

                  SUV

                  Comment

                  • Andreas
                    Unsaved Atheist Nazi Trash
                     
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 249

                    #10
                    Have you yet met Landover's own Remy LeBeau, who is "White by Marriage" and if so, what sort of Caucasian doings have you Boys been up to?

                    SUV
                    I have already met Mr White...erm...LeBlanc...LeBeau.

                    I think he's a very intelligent true Christian who's white by marriage, heart and by Jesus's approval.

                    Yours in Christ
                    Soon in Christ

                    Comment

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