Is Landover real?

[robert12345]

Is Landover baptist church a real church?
I find it awfully funny. And it's definitely to fundamental to be true.

I mean... Who believes Earth is flat in the 21st century. So not real.

If it is true, I apologize for insulting you.

Robbie

[Cueball]

Re: Is Landover real?

Is Landover baptist church a real church?

There's a surefire way to figure this out. (Which also works with other websites.)

Hit the reload button on your web browser. If the website reappears, you can be assured that the Landover Baptist Church is real!

[robert12345]

Re: Is Landover real?

There's a surefire way to figure this out. (Which also works with other websites.)

Hit the reload button on your web browser. If the website reappears, you can be assured that the Landover Baptist Church is real!

I know this forum is real. My question was about Landover baptist CHURCH. Is it a real church or just a joke or a parody of some sort?

[Ixi]

Re: Is Landover real?

I think its one big joke!!! I'm with you robert!

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Is Landover real?

What in Heaven's name is going on in here?

Icky and Robert! You naughty kids will both earn infraction points for questioning whether Landover is real. Why, it's as real as the nose on GOLDY Presiden't Bush's face!

So are the Landovarians who live here.

Don't be silly, you little homo's.

I hope you came here to learn about JESUS and what he can offer you. Which is Eternal Salvation(tm)!

GLORY!!!!

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: Is Landover real?

I am so tired of seeing this question from unsaved trash. Why do they automatically assume that Landover Baptist Church must be some huge joke, just because we preach the Holy King James Bible as it is, rather than as fluffy-bunny, wishy-washy, politically correct, not-quite-Christians think it ought to be?

I have news for both of you. Landover Baptist Church is every bit as real as the lake of fire for which you are headed. Let's see how funny you find the "joke" when you wake up in hell.

[robert12345]

Re: Is Landover real?

What in Heaven's name is going on in here?

Icky and Robert! You naughty kids will both earn infraction points for questioning whether Landover is real. Why, it's as real as the nose on GOLDY Presiden't Bush's face!

So are the Landovarians who live here.

Don't be silly, you little homo's.

I hope you came here to learn about JESUS and what he can offer you. Which is Eternal Salvation(tm)!

GLORY!!!!

Hey, calm down...It was just a simple question.
I have faith in Bush's nose, so Landover must be real too.
Where is Landover. Some posts here suggest you all live in a place called Freehold, which can only be found on your site, so...

And why are you calling her Icky, when her name is obviously Ixi.

So...Let's say this church is real... What are your beliefs? What's your doctrine. And how can you offer Eternal salvation(which is tm )I thought only Jesus can.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Is Landover real?

I think its one big joke!!! I'm with you robert!

SHUT UP ICKY! Why would hundreds of people spend YEARS studying the Bible just to make a joke, you rattle-brained little airhead?

Do you think http://www.godhatesfags is a joke?

Do you think Brother Pat Robertson is a joke?

DO YOU THINK THE GODLY PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES IS A JOKE?

I DARE ANY OF YOU HOMERS TO FIND ~ONE~ BIT OF SCRIPTURE ANYONE IN THIS CHURCH HAS EVER MISQUOTED OR USED OUT OF CONTEXT! JUST ONE!

[Ixi]

Re: Is Landover real?

[quote=robert12345;5803]

And why are you calling her Icky, when her name is obviously Ixi.
quote]

THANK YOU Rob!

[Remy Lebeau]

Re: Is Landover real?

Is Landover baptist church a real church?
I find it awfully funny. And it's definitely to fundamental to be true.

I mean... Who believes Earth is flat in the 21st century. So not real.

If it is true, I apologize for insulting you.

Robbie

Too fundamental to be real? Listen here, boy, those other picker chooser wishy washy pseudo christians you see running around quoting one verse and ignoring the rest are the fakers. We are TRUE CHRISTIANS™ and we are dead serious when it comes to our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ.

The water from the flood was absorbed into the mid layers of the earth's interior. This had a sponge-like effect which produces the current oval shape. How else do you explain why the oceans haven't been reduced to a giant mud pit... because there is already to much water soaked up already. Maybe if there was no Hell the water could go straight to the middle and then all sea life would die.

[robert12345]

Re: Is Landover real?

SHUT UP ICKY! Why would hundreds of people spend YEARS studying the Bible just to make a joke, you rattle-brained little airhead?

Do you think http://www.godhatesfags is a joke?

Do you think Brother Pat Robertson is a joke?

DO YOU THINK THE GODLY PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES IS A JOKE?

I DARE ANY OF YOU HOMERS TO FIND ~ONE~ BIT OF SCRIPTURE ANYONE IN THIS CHURCH HAS EVER MISQUOTED OR USED OUT OF CONTEXT! JUST ONE!

I already told you. I have deep faith in our godly president's nose.

And is it so hard to copy and paste some bible verses?

Matthew 7:15
Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.

Matthew 24:11
And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many.

Luke 6:26
Woe unto you, when all men shall speak well of you! for so did their fathers to the false prophets.

Revelation 16:13
And I saw three unclean spirits like frogs come out of the mouth of the dragon, and out of the mouth of the beast, and out of the mouth of the false prophet.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Is Landover real?

Welcome to Landover Friend.

Hopefully I can answere some of your questions before you end up in Hell being rump ravaged by Satan.

So...Let's say this church is real... What are your beliefs?

Our beliefs are the complete teachings of God in The Holy Bible with nothing omitted. If we are a joke, like you suggest, then the joke is how false the current popular teachings of Christianity are from what Jesus taught.

What's your doctrine. And how can you offer Eternal salvation(which is tm )I thought only Jesus can.

That is right friend. Only Jesus can SAVE you from Satan and Hellfire. We are His favorite Church because we follow ALL of His teachings. If you follow Christ faithful and completely then you are one of us.

[robert12345]

Re: Is Landover real?

Too fundamental to be real? Listen here, boy, those other picker chooser wishy washy pseudo christians you see running around quoting one verse and ignoring the rest are the fakers. We are TRUE CHRISTIANS™ and we are dead serious when it comes to our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ.

The water from the flood was absorbed into the mid layers of the earth's interior. This had a sponge-like effect which produces the current oval shape. How else do you explain why the oceans haven't been reduced to a giant mud pit... because there is already to much water soaked up already. Maybe if there was no Hell the water could go straight to the middle and then all sea life would die.

This may be a surprise for you, but Earth is in fact a planet. A spherical one.

I thought most "sane" Christians don't take the Bible literally. It is your right, but it makes you... extremely dumb. It's like saying bats are birds.

Bible is a great moral book, but it should not be taken literally. It's almost 2000 years old.

[Ixi]

Re: Is Landover real?

Yeah really! Believing every single world of the Bible makes you pretty stupid, its like taking metaphors literally.

[robert12345]

Re: Is Landover real?

Yeah really! Believing every single world of the Bible makes you pretty stupid, its like taking metaphors literally.

I agree, Ixi. Although I don't think they knew anything about universe.
So what's your religion? Are you a Christian, a Wiccan, an atheist?