[Brother Helge]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Congrats!
And btw - Mr Davis seems to be a real gentleman with his heart on the right place. Good luck!

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Tammi,
I am spelling that right, huh? It is a short name and with no 'y' on the end it won't be as easy to forget. I got your PM and have started my drive towards California. I will soon be passing the Louisiana, Texas border. I will drive for a few more miles on the interstate then get on the back roads as I must find a Baptist Church to fellowship with tomorrow. I have not been in this area before so it will be a new church for me tomorrow. Best I can figure I should be in California Tuesday or Wednesday.I hope your local church has Wednesday evening service so I can go and see what kind of guidance you have been getting from your Pastor and I can get a report card from him about you BEFORE I speak with your father.

I do not like to show up someplace with my hat in my hand, I always bring a house warming gift. I know I can pick up a bottle of cheap booze anywhere but does your father have a brand name he is loyal to? I understand that is the norm with drunks. What kind of thing should I bring your mother? The only thing I could think of is stopping at a Stuckeys restaurant and pick up a pecan log roll or something like that.

I have enclosed a brochure shot of my new RV. This picture is the same type and paint scheme anyway, you will notice, when you see mine, that I had the Sundeck and roof ''kitchen'' installed. It has a fold up screen patio up there which should be good for your monthly ''woman's time'' but we can talk about those things later. I just wanted you to know I was thinking of your comfort too. Inside the RV is all marble floors so you should have little problem keeping them clean. When you 1st see my new rv you have to remember I have not had a chance to make it me. I don't know if you knew but I have quite an interest in taxidermy. I know there is not a lot of room for lots of stuff so you can help me decide which of my trophies should go where.


I was wondering do you have an HGV license? If you are thinking ''huh'' right now that means no you haven't taken a heavy goods vehicle test, yet. If I were to be delayed you should get the book and start studying for the test as the laws are a bit different than a regular auto license.



well I better get back to driving, California isn't getting any closer just sitting here.

[TheLordSavedMe]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Tammi,
I am a spry pre 60 year old I will have you know. Are you age prejudice by any chance Tammi? I do not like to be around bigots but I don't like being around Negroes or messicans (or camel jockeys,koreans........and will run across the street to avoid vietcong gooks) either. Most of all I don't like bigots. Tell your father I am coming and I will discuss your dowry with him when I arrive.
Before it comes up, There is no room in the RV for your deformed brother either so you don't need to bring that up at all. A PM will be sent after Touched by an Angel goes off TV.

See, now I made you mad, and I didn't want to do that!

I just, I just want to make sure your a nice man and everything. This is all happening like soooooo fast and I'm, well I don't know much about boys, I mean men, and what they do to you and stuff. I'm just kinda nervous is all, I'll be alright.

Oh, and I was sorta making a joke about my half brother. I hardly know him anyways. To tell you the truth, he kinda creeps me out with his lips all messed up and the way he talks.

I think God punished him 'cuz my Dad is like a total drunk actually. But it is sad that he can't talk right and is super ugly, but God has rules for a reason!

I think you two would make a great couple. You have my blessing.

Thanks Pastor, that makes me feel better. Since my Dad is a drunk and all and you and Reverend Jim have like been soooooooo nice to me, you're both kinda like my Dads!

Tammi

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Tammi,
I am a spry pre 60 year old I will have you know. Are you age prejudice by any chance Tammi? I do not like to be around bigots but I don't like being around Negroes or messicans (or camel jockeys,koreans........and will run across the street to avoid vietcong gooks) either. Most of all I don't like bigots. Tell your father I am coming and I will discuss your dowry with him when I arrive.
Before it comes up, There is no room in the RV for your deformed brother either so you don't need to bring that up at all. A PM will be sent after Touched by an Angel goes off TV.

I think you two would make a great couple. You have my blessing.

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Uhm, I guess you could come out to San Jose. But even though I might go to Hell and stuff I can't like promise to marry you without at least meeting you first, can I?

And don't be mad or anything, but you're like how old? You look like you're grampa-old from your avatar and that really is you, right?

But like the Professor said, it's better than being raped by Satan forever and ever, so yeah, come on out here. My Dad is a drunk so I'm sure he won't care. If you told him you were going to cut my head off and use my skull for an ashtray, he'd probably say "Yeah, whatever! Buy me a bottle of bourbon and you can have my other brat kid too!" (I have a half brother with a cleft pallet, he lives in Montana).

Send me a PM and I'll give you directions. I'd do it on the main boards, but I don't want a bunch of unsaved perverts coming to my house and raping me!


Tammi

Tammi,
I am a spry pre 60 year old I will have you know. Are you age prejudice by any chance Tammi? I do not like to be around bigots but I don't like being around Negroes or messicans (or camel jockeys,koreans........and will run across the street to avoid vietcong gooks) either. Most of all I don't like bigots. Tell your father I am coming and I will discuss your dowry with him when I arrive.
Before it comes up, There is no room in the RV for your deformed brother either so you don't need to bring that up at all. A PM will be sent after Touched by an Angel goes off TV.

[TheLordSavedMe]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Tammi,
I Have been on my own for over a year since the wife died in a auto accident and people are beginning to ask why I am still on my own. I will only say that the auto accident took something from me that I didn't think I would ever get over losing, my old dog Beau. They say that time heals all wounds and I am beginning to think I should Remarry.
I am still living in my Winnebago but it is new and a 45 footer so there is room enough for somebody else. I am presently driving west and would consider traveling to California to see if your father and I will get along and come to some sort of arrangement. Before making the drive I need to know if you consider yourself a good cook, what would you say is your best meal you regularly serve? I also don't want any confusion later but you will not be allowed to touch certain of my personal things without my permission and when we are on the road you can never, never change the radio station. If you agree to my terms I will make the drive out there and will try to save you from an eternity of hell and damnation.

Uhm, I guess you could come out to San Jose. But even though I might go to Hell and stuff I can't like promise to marry you without at least meeting you first, can I?

And don't be mad or anything, but you're like how old? You look like you're grampa-old from your avatar and that really is you, right?

But like the Professor said, it's better than being raped by Satan forever and ever, so yeah, come on out here. My Dad is a drunk so I'm sure he won't care. If you told him you were going to cut my head off and use my skull for an ashtray, he'd probably say "Yeah, whatever! Buy me a bottle of bourbon and you can have my other brat kid too!" (I have a half brother with a cleft pallet, he lives in Montana).

Send me a PM and I'll give you directions. I'd do it on the main boards, but I don't want a bunch of unsaved perverts coming to my house and raping me!


Tammi

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Wait, what??? You mean if I get killed like tomorrow I'll go to HELL?!?

Are you sure about this? So I'm just as damned today as I was like a week ago?

Shoot! I still have to be super careful so I don't get killed clear until I find a husband AND have a baby?

Darn it! I just need to calm down, I was sooooooo happy yesterday when I found out I was a True Christian™ and now it's back to the way it was. Oh well, I guess I just have to get super serious about finding a True Christian™ to marry now, so I don't end up in HELL. Hank said he'd marry me a while back, maybe I'll just have to let him marry me AND make me have a baby. It's better than buring with Satan I guess!



Tammi +

Tammi,
I Have been on my own for over a year since the wife died in a auto accident and people are beginning to ask why I am still on my own. I will only say that the auto accident took something from me that I didn't think I would ever get over losing, my old dog Beau. They say that time heals all wounds and I am beginning to think I should Remarry.
I am still living in my Winnebago but it is new and a 45 footer so there is room enough for somebody else. I am presently driving west and would consider traveling to California to see if your father and I will get along and come to some sort of arrangement. Before making the drive I need to know if you consider yourself a good cook, what would you say is your best meal you regularly serve? I also don't want any confusion later but you will not be allowed to touch certain of my personal things without my permission and when we are on the road you can never, never change the radio station. If you agree to my terms I will make the drive out there and will try to save you from an eternity of hell and damnation.

[Professor Bessemer]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Wait, what??? You mean if I get killed like tomorrow I'll go to HELL?!?

Are you sure about this? So I'm just as damned today as I was like a week ago?

Shoot! I still have to be super careful so I don't get killed clear until I find a husband AND have a baby?

Darn it! I just need to calm down, I was sooooooo happy yesterday when I found out I was a True Christian™ and now it's back to the way it was. Oh well, I guess I just have to get super serious about finding a True Christian™ to marry now, so I don't end up in HELL. Hank said he'd marry me a while back, maybe I'll just have to let him marry me AND make me have a baby. It's better than buring with Satan I guess!



Tammi +

Tammi, I am sorry I have upset you. But you do make a valid point at the end of your post. It is preferable for a woman such as yourself to enter into a loveless marriage with a man who repulses you than it is to spend an eternity in hell.

Think about it dear, you are looking at only sixty, to at the most eighty, years of misery to attain an eternity in heaven with Jesus. To me, that sounds like a bargain! Glory!

[Disciple Luke]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Congratulations Tammi on your True Christian(tm) status.

[Sister Christina]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Wait, what??? You mean if I get killed like tomorrow I'll go to HELL?!?

Are you sure about this? So I'm just as damned today as I was like a week ago?

Shoot! I still have to be super careful so I don't get killed clear until I find a husband AND have a baby?

Darn it! I just need to calm down, I was sooooooo happy yesterday when I found out I was a True Christian™ and now it's back to the way it was. Oh well, I guess I just have to get super serious about finding a True Christian™ to marry now, so I don't end up in HELL. Hank said he'd marry me a while back, maybe I'll just have to let him marry me AND make me have a baby. It's better than buring with Satan I guess!



Tammi +

You might want to swing by the 'Meet Single Christians'-forum. Billy Bob Jenkins is looking for a new wife and I think we can agree that he would be quite the catch. Be aware though, that you might have to fight for him. He might not be the Zekie-stud but he certainly is the Billy Bob-hunk!

Good luck in your search. I'll be praying for you.

[TheLordSavedMe]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Congratulations on becoming a True Christian™ Tammi, you have earned it! But I would be remiss if I did not point something out to you. Now, I do not want to upset you, but even though you are a True Christian™, you are not yet guaranteed a place in heaven at the right hand of the Lord as you are a mere woman and you have not yet born children.

But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.

For Adam was first formed, then Eve.

And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.

Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.

1st Timothy 2:12-15

You see Tammi, because of Eve's transgression, women cannot attain the kingdom of heaven unless they are married to a True Christian™ man and have born him at least one child. Now, there are those that say you must bear your husband a son, and while that is certainly preferable, it is my understanding that bearing a daughter fulfills the requirement set forth in 1st Timothy.

Wait, what??? You mean if I get killed like tomorrow I'll go to HELL?!?

Are you sure about this? So I'm just as damned today as I was like a week ago?

Shoot! I still have to be super careful so I don't get killed clear until I find a husband AND have a baby?

Darn it! I just need to calm down, I was sooooooo happy yesterday when I found out I was a True Christian™ and now it's back to the way it was. Oh well, I guess I just have to get super serious about finding a True Christian™ to marry now, so I don't end up in HELL. Hank said he'd marry me a while back, maybe I'll just have to let him marry me AND make me have a baby. It's better than buring with Satan I guess!



Tammi +

[Jedediah]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Congratulations, TheLordSavedMe. Have you discussed potential suitors with your father and the Pastors yet? There's nothing holding you back from your courtship period now!

[landoverlover]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

WOW ! That is SO fantastic! The only downside (for me) is that I covet.

Do you have any advice for us mere aspirants to True Christendom, apart from being the best followers in Christ we can be?

Congratulations!

[Professor Bessemer]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

I have been looking, but San Jose has mostly unsaved people and Mexicans, so I'm not having much luck!

But tonight I'm not even a little sad about that, 'cuz I get to go to HEAVEN and see JESUS when I die!


Tammi

Congratulations on becoming a True Christian™ Tammi, you have earned it! But I would be remiss if I did not point something out to you. Now, I do not want to upset you, but even though you are a True Christian™, you are not yet guaranteed a place in heaven at the right hand of the Lord as you are a mere woman and you have not yet born children.

But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.

For Adam was first formed, then Eve.

And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.

Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.

1st Timothy 2:12-15

You see Tammi, because of Eve's transgression, women cannot attain the kingdom of heaven unless they are married to a True Christian™ man and have born him at least one child. Now, there are those that say you must bear your husband a son, and while that is certainly preferable, it is my understanding that bearing a daughter fulfills the requirement set forth in 1st Timothy.

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! THANK YOU!! PRAISE JESUS!!

Congratulations Young Lady!