[James Dewitt]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

Thank you for the kind words, Mitz. Yes I am trying to get overseas but it's proving harder than I hought. I'm in airport now, missed my flight first because the trucker tried to pull into an airport hotel and I had to dive out of his "rig". I landed on my suitcase, which first seemed good...then it went shooting down an incline like a sled and into a ditch with me on it. Stockings ruined

Then when I hobbled to airport and in customs they looked at a list and put me in a room where they started asking about stolen gems (?), Where was I going, Why &etc. &etc. till I thought my head was going to fall off and die. They ripped through my bag and then..kept searching me. It was so bad. And every time I thought Thank God This Is Over a "superior" would come in and start all over again! All this made me miss my flight. When they were going through my bag for about the 5th time and starting to rip at the lining I slipped out I don't know how I made it as I couldn't scuttle very fast. At least my heels didn't break off in the ditch that's the best I can say This is really why it PAYS in the long run to buy decent shoes instead of the kind that falls apart

My ticket was in bag AND my passport so now I'm making the rounds of the airport bars trying to find an airline pilot. Will explain later if it works.

Please pray for me!

PS: One thing they didn't count on hoho was that some Chanel suits are REVERSIBLE! So now I'm in different color and also asked a lady for a headscarf I turned into a turban. I don't think I'm getting any sleep tonight.

Has anyone heard from james???

Are you here yet? I smuggled a laptop into my cell, I have to hide it all the time and it is very uncomfortable. Why have you flown commercial? I have a jet in Freehold, unless Hutchins has taken control of that too. Last night I was tortured because I would not accept Buddha. The connected a car battery to my man parts and shocked me for what seemed like hours. I will never deny Jesus, NEVER! Help me!

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

I think everyone should remember Daniel when thinking of the trials and tribulations that Brother James is experiencing and remember that all that was needed was Daniel's unfaltering trust in the Lord our God. This whole episode might be a test that has been set for Brother Dewitt. Everyone should pray to God for his salvation but remember that this might be between him and Jesus.

Daniel 6:4-27 (King James Version)


4Then the presidents and princes sought to find occasion against Daniel concerning the kingdom; but they could find none occasion nor fault; forasmuch as he was faithful, neither was there any error or fault found in him.
5Then said these men, We shall not find any occasion against this Daniel, except we find it against him concerning the law of his God.
6Then these presidents and princes assembled together to the king, and said thus unto him, King Darius, live for ever.
7All the presidents of the kingdom, the governors, and the princes, the counsellors, and the captains, have consulted together to establish a royal statute, and to make a firm decree, that whosoever shall ask a petition of any God or man for thirty days, save of thee, O king, he shall be cast into the den of lions.
8Now, O king, establish the decree, and sign the writing, that it be not changed, according to the law of the Medes and Persians, which altereth not.
9Wherefore king Darius signed the writing and the decree.
10Now when Daniel knew that the writing was signed, he went into his house; and his windows being open in his chamber toward Jerusalem, he kneeled upon his knees three times a day, and prayed, and gave thanks before his God, as he did aforetime.
11Then these men assembled, and found Daniel praying and making supplication before his God.
12Then they came near, and spake before the king concerning the king's decree; Hast thou not signed a decree, that every man that shall ask a petition of any God or man within thirty days, save of thee, O king, shall be cast into the den of lions? The king answered and said, The thing is true, according to the law of the Medes and Persians, which altereth not.
13Then answered they and said before the king, That Daniel, which is of the children of the captivity of Judah, regardeth not thee, O king, nor the decree that thou hast signed, but maketh his petition three times a day.
14Then the king, when he heard these words, was sore displeased with himself, and set his heart on Daniel to deliver him: and he laboured till the going down of the sun to deliver him.
15Then these men assembled unto the king, and said unto the king, Know, O king, that the law of the Medes and Persians is, That no decree nor statute which the king establisheth may be changed.
16Then the king commanded, and they brought Daniel, and cast him into the den of lions. Now the king spake and said unto Daniel, Thy God whom thou servest continually, he will deliver thee.
17And a stone was brought, and laid upon the mouth of the den; and the king sealed it with his own signet, and with the signet of his lords; that the purpose might not be changed concerning Daniel.
18Then the king went to his palace, and passed the night fasting: neither were instruments of musick brought before him: and his sleep went from him.
19Then the king arose very early in the morning, and went in haste unto the den of lions.
20And when he came to the den, he cried with a lamentable voice unto Daniel: and the king spake and said to Daniel, O Daniel, servant of the living God, is thy God, whom thou servest continually, able to deliver thee from the lions?
21Then said Daniel unto the king, O king, live for ever.
22My God hath sent his angel, and hath shut the lions' mouths, that they have not hurt me: forasmuch as before him innocency was found in me; and also before thee, O king, have I done no hurt.
23Then was the king exceedingly glad for him, and commanded that they should take Daniel up out of the den. So Daniel was taken up out of the den, and no manner of hurt was found upon him, because he believed in his God.
24And the king commanded, and they brought those men which had accused Daniel, and they cast them into the den of lions, them, their children, and their wives; and the lions had the mastery of them, and brake all their bones in pieces or ever they came at the bottom of the den.
25Then king Darius wrote unto all people, nations, and languages, that dwell in all the earth; Peace be multiplied unto you.
26I make a decree, That in every dominion of my kingdom men tremble and fear before the God of Daniel: for he is the living God, and stedfast for ever, and his kingdom that which shall not be destroyed, and his dominion shall be even unto the end.
27He delivereth and rescueth, and he worketh signs and wonders in heaven and in earth, who hath delivered Daniel from the power of the lions.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

Are you here yet? I smuggled a laptop into my cell, I have to hide it all the time and it is very uncomfortable. Why have you flown commercial? I have a jet in Freehold, unless Hutchins has taken control of that too. Last night I was tortured because I would not accept Buddha. The connected a car battery to my man parts and shocked me for what seemed like hours. I will never deny Jesus, NEVER! Help me!

Oh, Brother James (Dewitt), you're such a kidder! What a card!

Are you enjoying your surprise vacation? It's so good to hear you making funnies again!

Brother James (Hutchins) made us all promise to keep your reservations at that resort a secret, even from you, so nobody would bother you with business. It's just a shame Cookie got waylaid by the TSA; she was bringing your birthday present.

Ah well. It'll still be here if you get back.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.



I regret to inform you all I haven't made it as far as I hoped. In fact, only one state over. ya-hoo

I met a pilot at the airport who said he was flying direct to China after I told him my story. It so happened he was able to borrow a stewardess outfit from a coworker and get me on board his plane, and though he wanted me to tell jokes etc with he and his buddy in the cockpit, after they broke the brandy out I fell asleep right away.

In what seemed like minutes, we were landing. I was so happy to see China, until I noticed it looked almost exactly like Iowa.

I AM IN NEBRASKA!

Captain Tom apologized for the misunderstanding and said I was welcome to "crash" at his place since I was now out of town and knew no one, but he didn't count on the true unity and fortitude of the Church of Landover, which I know in my heart of hearts will not desert me now.

Praise God™

Please pastors, wire money under my name to the Western Union in Lincoln. I'm stuck in the all night Internet cafe. And Brother Hutchins, there's funds James was holding for me from the success of our Menstrawear line. Deposit in my bank account (Terry Ann in Accounting has #) so I can withdraw after I get my ID replaced. This mission is getting way more challenging than I thought.

I'm dead tired and my knee puffed up please wire and transfer funds just as soon soon SOON as possivble. I left messages at church offices earlier, I'll check Western Union now in case its there.

Thank you EDIT PS: James I am so sorry you have to wait a little longer. I'm trying to get there as quick as I can. I know once the church wires me some money and the Menstrawear profits we'll get this taken care of faster than you can blink an eye. Are you acting sick like I told you? Do push ups and stuff at night and RUN IN PLACE. We might have to do some running later.

[James Hutchins]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

I have not had a chance to get by the bank. Maybe next week.

James, hang in there, I am doing all I can. I'll be in Vegas this weekend if anyone needs me.

[James Dewitt]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

Can you people read this? Is this in American? Damn Chink computer, some one answer me. HELP! Last night I was starving, I had to eat SHRIMP, HELP. When I get back (IF I get back) there are some changes that I am going to make, it wont be pretty! Brother Porter, pull the cash from DFAC.

[Bible Student]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

I have not had a chance to get by the bank. Maybe next week.

James, hang in there, I am doing all I can. I'll be in Vegas this weekend if anyone needs me.

Will you be making substantial investments there?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

Can you people read this? Is this in American? Damn Chink computer, some one answer me. HELP! Last night I was starving, I had to eat SHRIMP, HELP. When I get back (IF I get back) there are some changes that I am going to make, it wont be pretty! Brother Porter, pull the cash from DFAC.

See, now if that's not proof you're kidding, I don't know what is.

Everybody knows you don't eat shellfish. You'd starve first!

Oh, and Brother James, thank you so much for the Dewitt Industries donation to my humble congregation. While members of the congregation had designed our project a couple of years ago, we were having grave difficulties in these difficult times in raising the necessary funds for construction and staffing.

The James Dewitt Memorial Retreat Center and Spa will help us reach out to Christians throughout all of Indiana!

It was so kind of you to have Brother Hutchins send the $15M yesterday. I hope you'll both be able to attend the grand opening, tentatively scheduled for December 21, 2012.

[Didymus Much]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

...The James Dewitt Memorial Retreat Center and Spa...

Jumping the gun a bit there, Rod?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

Jumping the gun a bit there, Rod?

When Brother Hutchins wired the donation, he said that was the name James wanted assigned to the project, because the campus will remain long after James goes home to God.

I thought it a bit premature myself, but who am I to question a benefactor's choice of project name?

. . . you don't think James is keeping something from us, do you?

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

When Brother Hutchins wired the donation, he said that was the name James wanted assigned to the project, because the campus will remain long after James goes home to God.

I thought it a bit premature myself, but who am I to question a benefactor's choice of project name?

. . . you don't think James is keeping something from us, do you?

I don't think I will ever forget the words of wisdom Brother James shared with me the last time we were sharing a meal at the club. He was telling me how predestination was one of the most stabilizing forces of modern times. How Jesus had a plan for us and if you just put your trust, totally and without reservation, nothing but good will come of it. I do believe that conversation will forever be how I will always remember Brother James. Not that I am saying there won't be other interactions with him [if it is in the Lords wonderful plan, of course] but that last supper with Brother Dewitt was one to remember. I hope we will be breaking bread together again, some day soon, friend [remember it is your turn to pick up the check].

[James Dewitt]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

As I sit in this rotting cell, by all that is Holy I will get each of you! I know you can see my pleas for help! You can take my money, you can take all of my possessions , but mark my words I will return! Jesus is on my side, and you will hear from me! Cookie will get me out of here! IF I HAD MY KJV1611...

[James Dewitt]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

Porter I know you are out there, you can hide, you can run. Cut the damn check!

[Brother Harold Porter]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

Can you people read this? Is this in American? Damn Chink computer, some one answer me. HELP! Last night I was starving, I had to eat SHRIMP, HELP. When I get back (IF I get back) there are some changes that I am going to make, it wont be pretty! Brother Porter, pull the cash from DFAC.

Brother James,

If you are indeed hungry, I will see to it that a pre-paid Diner's Club card is sent your way in the amount of $500. This should permit a week of meals more to your choosing.

But as CEO of DFAC Ministries, I cannot "pull cash" from our charity beyond what you require for basic sustenance. I am certain you understand my responsibilities to protect our assets.

We will discuss any changes in DFAC after your return to Freehold and the subsequent psychiatric evaluations that will be required.

Sincerely in Christ,

Harold Porter
CEO DFAC Ministries

[James Dewitt]

Re: I am going to a retreat for a couple of weeks.

Brother James,

If you are indeed hungry, I will see to it that a pre-paid Diner's Club card is sent your way in the amount of $500. This should permit a week of meals more to your choosing.

But as CEO of DFAC Ministries, I cannot "pull cash" from our charity beyond what you require for basic sustenance. I am certain you understand my responsibilities to protect our assets.

We will discuss any changes in DFAC after your return to Freehold and the subsequent psychiatric evaluations that will be required.

Sincerely in Christ,

Harold Porter
CEO DFAC Ministries

All right Porter the gloves are off. $500 bucks, I put you in charge of 1 Billion dollars and change, and all you have for me is $500 dollars.
MY shoe laces cost that. Call Cookie and get me the hell out of here! YOUR JOB DEPENDS ON IT! Jesus give me the strenght to get though this, I will get you mark my words!