[Old Man Winter]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

I don't think any of you actually read the article in question.
Read it then comment, don't just assume because the man who was shot was Black that he was a stereotype Black man, of which there are a few.

[JennyD]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Mr. Martin, I for one congratulate you on recognizing that being an officer of the law -- even a traffic enforcement officer like yourself -- is dangerous. Like these three brave NYPD officers, you could be viciously attacked and forced to defend yourself by firing dozens of shots into a parked car!

You've realized that you're not cut out for such a life. Good for you!

Perhaps now you can join the God Squad, a Landover ministry which transforms former police officers into Godly Christians, who then offer their lives in Jesus' service, providing security at our events!

First, being a Catholic, you'd need to start with Mrs. Betty Bowers' Baptists are Saving Homosexuals (BASH) program, to be sure you won't be tempted toward any kiddy-diddling.

You may ask, "But, I'm a Catholic. Even if I complete this BASH program, how would I be let onto the Landover grounds?" Simple, Mr. Martin.

Nobody who is not a True Christian(tm) can complete the BASH program; it is through developing that close loving relationship with Jesus and being completely filled with His penetrating Love -- and the realization that no amount of buggery, one-on-one or in groups, top, bottom, or versatile, can ever satisfy again -- that ex-Gayness is achieved!

Once you're a registered ex-Gay, you would be trained by the God Squad in techniques such as bullet-taking, grenade-jumping, and bomb-defusing. But don't worry, your early assignments will be a bit less demanding; most God Squad members start off outside a kitchen window, keeping close watch over Sister Thumper's cherry pie.

What do you say? Would you care to start a new life, one leading along the narrow path to Heaven? Or will you enter at the wide gate? Will you continue down the pedophilic pathway, the Catholic Highway to Hell?

The journey of a thousand miles begins with one small step, Mr. Martin. You've taken that first step . . . will you continue?

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Your not very nice are you.

What is there not to love in Jesus?

[Eugene Hackwith]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Another dead nig.....so what. Think of all rape, pie-stealing and crack selling crimes that were prevented. GLORY!

You are such a dramatic wussy Offcr Martin. I'd be damned if I'd give up my job over a dead niglet.

He was also killed before his wedding, so don't leave out the 7 kids he would eventually have and then abandon.

[Old Man Winter]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Your not very nice are you.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Another dead nig.....so what. Think of all rape, pie-stealing and crack selling crimes that were prevented. GLORY!

You are such a dramatic wussy Offcr Martin. I'd be damned if I'd give up my job over a dead niglet.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Where does it say in the Bible "thou must give to the Landover Baptist Church"?

You want to give to a real church rather than some sham like the Roman institution, don't you? What better test for a real church is there than whether it follows the entire Bible?

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Why would i give strangers i met on the internet money?
seems like a scam to me.

Dear friend:

It hurts to hear God's favorite church described in such terms. As the one church that follows the entire King James Bible, we are no more a scam than God or His Word.

[Old Man Winter]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Where does it say in the Bible "thou must give to the Landover Baptist Church"?

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

In response to the OP: I figured that the Wal-Mart had received too many complaints about doughnut crumbs everywhere.

[Old Man Winter]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Why would i give strangers i met on the internet money?
seems like a scam to me.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Why do you have to pay to be in this Church?
That seems so cult like.

Because God says so.

Malachi 3:8: Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings.

[Sister Noddy]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Why do you have to pay to be in this Church?
That seems so cult like.

The money is for baby Jesus! Pay up, sinner! Jesus hates a tightwad!

[Old Man Winter]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

Why do you have to pay to be in this Church?
That seems so cult like.

[Sister Noddy]

Re: I resign from the DMPD

As of today, I, Albert Martin, am no longer a member of the Des Moines police department ...

So, I turned in my badge & gun to the police chief, and am now looking at other career options ...

Why am I not surprised? What's next for you, do you want to go for the priesthood like your beadfinger brother? But of course you will need years of seminary studies!

Are you sure you can handle the required satanic training, officer?