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  • #31
    Re: I need a firm, loving Christian husband.

    Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
    Well, I hope that you keep the woodchipper safely away from Ching Lee when she has to go to clean on the roof!


    Not unless I or you learn to teleport .
    Simply pointing out a few odd things. It just seems very weird that the woodchipper was in such an odd place where it would have been much more useful in a different part of the yard, and there just happened to be loose tile (it was loose tile, wasn't it, Pastor Al?) and the woodchipper happened to be EXACTLY under where the loose tile was.
    Just a little strange is all.
    I do believe the good Pastor stated that Mrs. Pistle was trimming the apple tree when she fell. Thus, she was cutting branches and tossing them directly into the chipper.

    Perhaps you'd like her to work inefficiently, cut the branches and THEN chip them?

    Comment

    • #32
      Re: I need a firm, loving Christian husband.

      Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
      No it isn't. It's about the same as the fairy tales of the Brothers Grimm, except less interesting.
      The Bible is no book of fairy tales. It is the unfalliable, inerrant, and inspired Word of God. It contains the 100% truth.

      Comment

      • #33
        Re: I need a firm, loving Christian husband.

        Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
        Sheesh, one typo and you go nuts.
        As to teleportation, I'm not advocating it, I'm merely stating that unless you learn it, I won't be at any of your bonfires.
        Who needs teleportation when we have ghost planes?
        O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



        God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

        Comment

        • #34
          Re: I need a firm, loving Christian husband.

          Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
          Who needs teleportation when we have ghost planes?

          Please do elaborate Brother Temperance. Are these planes on or aroud Sheol? Honesty, after my discussions with Pastor J. Daniels tonight, I am very curious.
          "If thou buy an Hebrew servant, six years he shall serve: and in the seventh he shall go out free for nothing. . . . And if a man sell his daughter to be a maidservant, she shall not go out as the manservant's do."
          (Leviticus 21:6-7)

          Comment

          • #35
            Re: I need a firm, loving Christian husband.

            Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
            Not unless I or you learn to teleport .
            Oh, we can arrange transport to Iowa from that spider infested oversized island of yours Rachael.


            Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
            Simply pointing out a few odd things. It just seems very weird that the woodchipper was in such an odd place where it would have been much more useful in a different part of the yard, and there just happened to be loose tile (it was loose tile, wasn't it, Pastor Al?) and the woodchipper happened to be EXACTLY under where the loose tile was.
            Just a little strange is all.
            It was a tree branch Rachael and by horrible chance the poor Mss Pistle was pruning it and tossing branches into the wood chipper under her. (Pastor Al's Mexican gardeners were drunk and asleep at the time since it was Cinco de Mayo. Al is such a softy, why all his indoor servants were is Des Moines that day on a outing paid by the kind Pastor) You see, a sad and far to common household accident Rachael. You have trees there is Australia Rachael, correct? Then I urge you to be careful too.

            Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

            Hot Must ReadThreads!


            Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

            Comment

            • #36
              Re: I need a firm, loving Christian husband.

              Originally posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
              You have trees there is Australia Rachael, correct? Then I urge you to be careful too.
              I hear they have barbeque pits, too.

              Comment

              • #37
                Re: I need a firm, loving Christian husband.

                Originally posted by Rev. Dr. Davidson View Post
                Please do elaborate Brother Temperance. Are these planes on or aroud Sheol? Honesty, after my discussions with Pastor J. Daniels tonight, I am very curious.
                We don't like to talk about the ghost planes.
                O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                Comment

                • #38
                  Re: I need a firm, loving Christian husband.

                  Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
                  We don't like to talk about the ghost planes.
                  I thought you meant this one.

                  Comment

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