[hellion]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

You're no true pastor.

First, you're a woman and women can't be pastors.
Second, you're a hellbound sinning harlot.
Third, you deny Jesus and thus can't be a pastor.

Legally, I am. I even have this certificate of credentials with my name on it and everything. It's pretty cool.

[Jesus is Lord]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

Legally, I am. I even have this certificate of credentials with my name on it and everything. It's pretty cool.

Legally you may be a pastor but you aren't a True Pastor. The only True Pastors are those ordained by Landover Baptist Church.

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

Legality means nothing! Supposedly it is "unlawful" to kill someone in the United States, yet we are commanded to by the Creator. Laws mean nothing because Jesus overrides them all--it all boils down to whom you want to follow: God, or Satan.

[SalvationSeeker]

Re: My Last Ad Here!!! just wanna kick it - 23

What's the point of having sex if you can't get-off? Other than having a kid, but that's besides the point. And even so, it's totally not worth it. I'd rather go to Hell then to not be able to have an orgasm!

Don't mention the o-word here, please.
That's reserved for men by the way, only harlots ever experience it.
And you said why yourself, PROCREATION.
You women is little but ovens for the young soldiers of Christ to bake in.
Women are Saved through childbirth and a life of stillness. (In addition to accepting Jesus of course.)

God has set this order in stone, to last until the last of days.
It can never be changed, no matter what some filthy lieberals think.
Praise God!


And how could you ever be a Pastor, hellion? Laughable.
You're not a Pastor in the eyes of God, that's for certain.
Women aren't allown to be teachers of any kind, not to mention that you don't know the first thing about the holy Bible (KJV1611)..

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

Legally, I am. I even have this certificate of credentials with my name on it and everything. It's pretty cool.

You are NOT a pastor. You are a phony Christian. GOD IS NOT MOCKED!!!!

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

I can make a little certificate thing saying that I am able to fly, but does that make it so? NO! Only God's say-so matters, nothing else!

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

And you all call me filthy.
This thread has gone on for pages about smoking joints and smoking poles....for xtians, you sure spend a lot of time talking about weed and blowjobs.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

And you all call me filthy.
This thread has gone on for pages about smoking joints and smoking poles....for xtians, you sure spend a lot of time talking about weed and blowjobs.

Yes, harlot. We talk on and on about the lowest perversions that you and your fellow satan worshipers practice. We are called upon by Jesus Himself to rebuke thee and yank back the screen of respectability you whore mongers attempt to cover your degeneracy with. We want all the world to see you for what you are; blasphemous pervert drug pushers.

Proverbs 6
[16] These six things doth the LORD hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him:
[17] A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,
[18] An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief,
[19] A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.


The verse posted above refers directly to YOU, witch. Don't try and stop our Godly Crusade, or you will find yourself dispatched to hellfire faster than you can say "Help me Jesus"!

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

How ridiculous. You instantly assume that everyone who is not a landover baptist is a drug dealing dopehead?

I hate to break it to you, Zeke, but one does not need to be an xtian to have morals. Tell me, smart guy, if xtians are so wonderful, why is it that close to 90% of people in the US prison system are xtians? Well? What does that say?
Belief in your deity does the opposite of making one a better person.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

How ridiculous. You instantly assume that everyone who is not a landover baptist is a drug dealing dopehead?

I hate to break it to you, Zeke, but one does not need to be an xtian to have morals. Tell me, smart guy, if xtians are so wonderful, why is it that close to 90% of people in the US prison system are xtians? Well? What does that say?
Belief in your deity does the opposite of making one a better person.

Those are sweaty greasy wetback homers covered with tattoos who get tossed in the slammer for life when they rape white women, then claim to find Jesus. They are as Christian as you are, harlot. They are posers who hope that by parroting a few scriptures that they don't even understand, the parole board will go easy on them.

As far as I know, the only True Christians™ in prison are the wardens.

And yes, it is an obvious fact that all unsaved scum non-believers are immoral pawns of satan. I assumed that even you knew that much. Without the Holy Bible as your guide, you are lost. Which you are.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

I know that you believe that 'all unsaved scum are pawns of Satan', but that doesn't make it true. The fact is the most decent people ARE NOT xtians, and the ones who find things like viciousness, spitefulness and judgementalism absolutely fine and perfectly acceptable and even something to be encouraged are the xtians like you.

It even says in your book to judge, it encourages it. The fact is that you and others here seem to be the prime example of everything that's wrong with the world. But you're proud of that, I suppose.
How wonderful for you. Would you like a medal now?

[hellion]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

Legality means nothing! Supposedly it is "unlawful" to kill someone in the United States, yet we are commanded to by the Creator. Laws mean nothing because Jesus overrides them all--it all boils down to whom you want to follow: God, or Satan.

Satan!

[hellion]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

You are NOT a pastor. You are a phony Christian. GOD IS NOT MOCKED!!!!

I'm not even christian! That's the great thing about it! All I had to do was type in my name and wa-la. I'm a reverend. Now I can marry people and baptise people and give sermons. In your face, god!

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

Satan!

Precisely as I expected. You reject Jesus' kindly offer of Eternal Salvation and throw it back in His gorgeous face. How sad. I will certainly miss you in Heaven

[hellion]

Re: looking for some goodtimes - 23

Precisely as I expected. You reject Jesus' kindly offer of Eternal Salvation and throw it back in His gorgeous face. How sad. I will certainly miss you in Heaven

Like you're going to heaven. Actually, I hope you do. Hell will be 10 times worse if you're there.