[James Dewitt]

Re: Friday fish fetish

I can eat any food I wish, on which ever day I chose. or may not.


Peacefully Yours,

Handmaiden.

p.s. Go LBC ... You rock!
(now this would be the perfect place for an emoticon)

Well kind of read the following thread.

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=28755

[handmaiden]

Re: Friday fish fetish

With the abundance of sarcasm it's difficult to discern which sentiments of yours are from the bottom of your heart or from the heart of your bottom.

And peace to you, Brother.



You know, I always thought of myself as being more of the sardonic type, rather than sarcastic. I have almost never been laconic, but am often ironic.

I know that the emoticons are often used to relay the "tone" of the writer's intent; but I resist them because I think that they weaken my writing. Still, the judicious use of them when the occasion calls for it may be of benefit to my communication in this particular venue. So, I must learn to set aside my disdain.

Think about it though, can you imagine the state of world literature if the cannon of Great Books had been written with use of emoticons? War and Peace would be shorter,that's for certain.

Oooo, now if the Bible were sprinkled with emoticons, it would be an even more exciting read! It could come alive in dimensions hitherto unknown!

I hope that idea was not blasphemous. Is it blasphemous to say that the Bible is the most significant piece of literature ever written; and that it should examined to understand its influence on world history and social development?


Whether one accepts it to be of divine origin or not, it cannot be ignored or disposed of altogether--not if one wishes to understand Western Civilization in particular, or the universal human quest for meaning and purpose as individuals and communities globally.

Being human is so complex; sometimes it really is easier to understand God as cast within the framework of the Bible. With that kind of deity, you know where you stand. It's like -- He's God, you're not. He calls the shots, you don't. Heaven or hell are the end points. Here are the rules. Knock yourself out.

It's been a rough spiritual journey for me, but I'm grateful for my exposure to the Bible. Thanks to the fellowship of LBC, many of my concerns and conflicts over it have been resolved.

I can eat any food I wish, on which ever day I chose. or may not.


Peacefully Yours,

Handmaiden.

p.s. Go LBC ... You rock!
(now this would be the perfect place for an emoticon)

[Brother Barnabus]

Re: Friday fish fetish

Hey, I applauded you on your eloquence and I meant it, Brother.

Actions speak louder than words. And good, old fashioned American English speaks more clearly than Latin anyday.



Hastily Yours,

Handmaid--ouch!

With the abundance of sarcasm it's difficult to discern which sentiments of yours are from the bottom of your heart or from the heart of your bottom.

[handmaiden]

Re: Friday fish fetish

It is not an act of crudeness to openly express disdain for the bead kneaders.

Hey, I applauded you on your eloquence and I meant it, Brother.

Actions speak louder than words. And good, old fashioned American English speaks more clearly than Latin anyday.

This then is your decision: Are you going to eat something that has been floating around in lukewarm filthy water that you wouldn’t let an atheist drink, or are you going to bite into a steak from a contented cow who spent its life munching green grass and breathing in the pure air of America?

Tears. Tears of pride. They soak my keyboard at your stirring words.

(They are now starting a small electrical fire even as I write.)


Hastily Yours,

Handmaid--ouch!

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Friday fish fetish

In the Early Middle Ages, papist monks had fish ponds near their abbeys. The monks thought that they would thus make a hansom profit. Now Monks lived in communes, which were the origins of Communism. Unsurprisingly, these insanitary swamps, into which the effluent of the monastery would flow, bred mainly eels, leeches and slugs. Such fish as there were, were pulled out dead or dying.

In an attempt to force the gullible and damned to buy (and perhaps eat) their produce, the pope made it compulsory to have fish on Fridays.

This then is your decision: Are you going to eat something that has been floating around in lukewarm filthy water that you wouldn’t let an atheist drink, or are you going to bite into a steak from a contented cow who spent its life munching green grass and breathing in the pure air of America?

[Brother Barnabus]

Re: Friday fish fetish

Well.


I don't think anyone here could fault you for your eloquence, Brother Barnabus.



Openly Yours,

Handmaiden

It is not an act of crudeness to openly express disdain for the bead kneaders.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Friday fish fetish

Okay, Brother Jones if I am out of line , please advise me.

As for any claim that I made about the necessity for following the Bible word for word-- that is the contention of LBC. All scripture is valid for instruction; the Word of the Lord never changes. Jesus came to fullfil the law, not to invalidate it. It seems so simple to me. I'm not about to pick and choose verses to validate any statements coming out of my mouth.

Call me, Levi.

Just scourging you a little lest you become an illegitimate child of Christ.

[handmaiden]

Re: Friday fish fetish

1. Go ahead and buy the Big Mac.
Exaggerate savoring the big mac, then belch twice, fart once.

Well.


I don't think anyone here could fault you for your eloquence, Brother Barnabus.



Openly Yours,

Handmaiden

[Brother Barnabus]

Re: Friday fish fetish

Well, there are a few large creatures in the neighborhood. If I did catch me some meat, I might enjoy the eviseration process. Just one quick slice up the length and the deed is done.

Cheerfully Yours,

Handmaiden

1. Go ahead and buy the Big Mac.
2. Take said Big Mac to the Holy Conception Catholic (Church) snicker,
where they're having a big fish fry on their bingo night.
3. Find Monsignor and/or Mother Superior and consume the mac right in front of them.
4. Exaggerate savoring the big mac, then belch twice, fart once.
5. Leave.

I'm sure you'll feel sated and it'll help get you over the fish thing.

[handmaiden]

Re: Friday fish fetish

Gentlemen, thank you sparing a little bit of your time to respond to my concerns.

God said that it was ok for Peter to eat unclean animals. Joo Kosher foods are nonsense.

Acts 10:10-15

10And he became very hungry, and would have eaten: but while they made ready, he fell into a trance,
11And saw heaven opened, and a certain vessel descending upon him, as it had been a great sheet knit at the four corners, and let down to the earth:
12Wherein were all manner of fourfooted beasts of the earth, and wild beasts, and creeping things, and fowls of the air.
13And there came a voice to him, Rise, Peter; kill, and eat.
14But Peter said, Not so, Lord; for I have never eaten any thing that is common or unclean.
15And the voice spake unto him again the second time, What God hath cleansed, that call not thou common.

Excellent citation there. You know the phrase about the white sheet with four corners? Years ago I had this crazy idea that it was sort of like the make-do projection screen that my dad used to put up when we watched home movies. He would hang up a big bed sheet and we would see the images projected onto them. I used to wonder if God did something similar with Peter-- lowering a sheet and "projecting" images of all the animals onto it.

Post scriptures that back up your claim.

Okay, Brother Jones if I am out of line , please advise me. Which claim do I need to back up in a specific way? I used to be chummy and philosophical with an orthodox rabbi and now I don't -- don't have any verses to back that up.

The Catholic church did a number on me and other than a file full of therapy bills, I don't have any means to back that up. The Catholic church has some VERY hypocritical views on sex. That's not a Biblical claim, but common knowledge of current events should make that clear.

As someone who grew up Catholic and Italian, I can tell you that the Catholic church pandered to the Mafia. Everyone knew that the Capos had mistresses and ran prostitution rings, but when it came time for weddings and funerals, there was always a priest on hand to preside over the rituals and provide a blessing.

As for any claim that I made about the necessity for following the Bible word for word-- that is the contention of LBC. All scripture is valid for instruction; the Word of the Lord never changes. Jesus came to fullfil the law, not to invalidate it. It seems so simple to me. I'm not about to pick and choose verses to validate any statements coming out of my mouth.

I could slip up and fall away at any time; but the Word of the Lord Endureth Forever. Mine or any other person's "belief" doesn't change the Truth about God's existance. That which is -- is -- that which is not -- is not. We cannot make it false by doubting it any more than we can make it true by believing.

Mortal conjecture about the nature of reality will always be limited by the very fact of our mortal existance.

No matter how smart we are, or how sophisticated our science becomes, we're only human.

Mortally Yours,

Handmaiden

[Robert Jones]

Re: Friday fish fetish

I certainly agree. She should grab whatever meat she can find to avoid the flames of hell that reverting to kathlicksism brings.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Friday fish fetish

Post scriptures that back up your claim.

Brethren, let us focus on this woman's problem; she is struggling with the temptations of Papism! Right now Lucifer is luring her back to soul bondage with Rome with fried fish. Don't you all agree her eating a dead squirrel is vastly better than her ending up some Ash Wednesday with filth smeared over her forehead making her was a harlot of the Anti-Christ?

[Levi Jones]

Re: Friday fish fetish

Brother Jones, are you certain that dogs and cats are kosher? Excuse me, I mean are they Bible certified to NOT be an abominiation?

Forgive my little slip. During my lapsed "tolerant" days, I was friends with several Jews and even made an attempt to learn about their culture. I even conversed with an orthodox Jewish rabbi!

Happliy, those days are behind me. Now I must purge myself of any lingering influences from my damaging Catholic past. With all their hypocritical teachings on sex and the demand for fishy Fridays, there may seem like a lot of repairs needed on my psyche. But Praise Jesus, if I can manage to follow every word of the Bible, I'll never be mixed up again!

Joyously Yours,

Handmaiden

Post scriptures that back up your claim.

[Robert Jones]

Re: Friday fish fetish

Brother Jones, are you certain that dogs and cats are kosher? Excuse me, I mean are they Bible certified to NOT be an abominiation?

Forgive my little slip. During my lapsed "tolerant" days, I was friends with several Jews and even made an attempt to learn about their culture. I even conversed with an orthodox Jewish rabbi!

Happliy, those days are behind me. Now I must purge myself of any lingering influences from my damaging Catholic past. With all their hypocritical teachings on sex and the demand for fishy Fridays, there may seem like a lot of repairs needed on my psyche. But Praise Jesus, if I can manage to follow every word of the Bible, I'll never be mixed up again!

Joyously Yours,

Handmaiden

God said that it was ok for Peter to eat unclean animals. Joo Kosher foods are nonsense.

Acts 10:10-15

10And he became very hungry, and would have eaten: but while they made ready, he fell into a trance,
11And saw heaven opened, and a certain vessel descending upon him, as it had been a great sheet knit at the four corners, and let down to the earth:
12Wherein were all manner of fourfooted beasts of the earth, and wild beasts, and creeping things, and fowls of the air.
13And there came a voice to him, Rise, Peter; kill, and eat.
14But Peter said, Not so, Lord; for I have never eaten any thing that is common or unclean.
15And the voice spake unto him again the second time, What God hath cleansed, that call not thou common.

[handmaiden]

Re: Friday fish fetish

A Dog or Cat will do. Just get your hands on some meat now before you finding yourself falling back into sin. I'm eating some meat as I write this. Meat is not that hard to come by.

Brother Jones, are you certain that dogs and cats are kosher? Excuse me, I mean are they Bible certified to NOT be an abominiation?

Forgive my little slip. During my lapsed "tolerant" days, I was friends with several Jews and even made an attempt to learn about their culture. I even conversed with an orthodox Jewish rabbi!

Happliy, those days are behind me. Now I must purge myself of any lingering influences from my damaging Catholic past. With all their hypocritical teachings on sex and the demand for fishy Fridays, there may seem like a lot of repairs needed on my psyche. But Praise Jesus, if I can manage to follow every word of the Bible, I'll never be mixed up again!

Joyously Yours,

Handmaiden