The Final Solution to Cure American Faggotry

[Q.Ponce Frottage]

This is a tentative soft pitch to Landover Baptist Church. I know I'm a Quebecois, outsider, a renegade - but we have something in common. We recognize the sickness that is homosexuality that's poisoned a Godly nation. And God spoke to me, and gave this idea so crazy it just might work. For the next Pride, Landover should host a massive revival meeting that will draw faggots all over the nation to come. Of course, we can build a decoy town next to Freehold so that we don't actually have to have the gays come onto the church property which would be really disgusting. Once all the homers come pouring in, we distract them with a floor show and drag reading. As they enter the main hall, they are issued a butt plug seemingly to entice their sick pleasures, but once inserted in the anus, will issue a non-fatal shock to buzz in the Lord's Glory and intercept demons, and will shake it all out. We'll need volunteers in the congretation to step up the plate for the most important task - a drag show. I know Landover has really brave men like Mayor Joe Hold, Cranky Old Man, BrotherLarry who I'm sure will don wigs, lipstick, fishnets and satin garters with big frilly bows if it was for the Lord's Work. Once the geys are fully distracted, the real purpose will reveal - Sister Isabella can come out and sit in a rocking chair and read scripture, warn of the firey Hell that awaits them should they continue this deathstyle. We can have some really cool pyromatics to demonstrate this. It will be a really moving display, once its over, the once-homers will exit fully humbled by what they witnessed and will set forth as heterosexual men who will start families and contribute to keeping America great!

What do you think??

[Romeo Rovagnati]

I haven't read the text at the beginning of the post, as it sounds like another leftist nonsense meme.

However, I agree that we need to cure America's problem with sodomy. And that solution is the following: if your friend has a sodomite son, sell your virgin daughter to him.

I would also say that being a Catholic priest could solve the problem, if it weren't for the fact that even His Holiness Pope Francis I (may he rest in peace) said that there is too much "frociaggine".

[Johny Joe Hold]

We can have some really cool pyromatics to demonstrate this. It will be a really moving display, once its over, the once-homers will exit fully humbled by what they witnessed and will set forth as heterosexual men who will start families and contribute to keeping America great!

What do you think??

We have had great success at Landover Baptist using deception against homers. Set out some bait and they go right for it. Here is one successful campaign we ran:

Some ideas for Christian pranks. - The Landover Baptist Church Forum

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

I've learned from bitter experience there's nothing the sodomite won't use as a sex toy. Even a booby trapped butt plug will turn out to be something they will flaunt in the most disgusting orifice imaginable.

[MitzaLizalor]

if your friend has a sodomite son, sell your virgin daughter to him.

Surprised this precedent came from a Romish source and it is almost Scriptural. When just Lot

II Peter 2:7 [God] delivered just Lot, vexed with the filthy conversation of the wicked

responded to improper demands for the angels visiting him to be sent out for "group" activities (the mind boggles) he did not offer to sell his daughters. I'm not sure how many daughters he has, since he also had sons-in-law, this being a moot point because he offers his virgin daughters FOR FREE.

Genesis 19:7-8 [Lot] said, I pray you, brethren, do not so wickedly. Behold now, I have two daughters which have not known man; let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you, and do ye to them as is good in your eyes: only unto these men do nothing; for therefore came they under the shadow of my roof.

The throng—imagine a mosh pit on aphrodisiacs—were not interested in daughters which had not known man unto whom, Lot assured them, may be done as was good in their eyes. Not on your nelly! They wanted the men and if they were angels, which they were, so much the better. You couldn't have paid them to take the daughters. Now in this environment, married daughters and daughters which have not known man could be the same daughters.

But the concept of selling them is ludicrous, to any mind not so infused with the "everything is for sale" ethos as is suggested here. If you would like prayer helping you to find Jesus, I am very happy to help in any way I can. And it's great to see you're referencing The Bible, albeit incompletely. I hope this is helpful.

In Him.