[Romeo Rovagnati]

Re: I worship The Poope and I'm trying to infiltrate your Church

My good friend Romeo- I fear you have aroused the ire of these white people. They are fine people for white people and they are very accepting of the opinions of other people as long as you keep them to yourself. I am a Black man from the country of Jamaica but I have lived here in Babylon for more than a year and I have learned very much about white people. I believe that since you live in Italy that you are less exposed to white people and I am very happy to guide you. I was also very ignorant of the ways of white people until I became a student in their country and learned that they aren't quite as awful as I had been led to believe. If you have any questions about how to conduct yourself in conversations with these Baptists I will be happy to offer advice.


Jah Guide
Trevor

Are you actually saying that Italians are not White? Also, how come our God could hate Italians if he looks like one himself?

[I Man Rastafari]

Re: I worship The Poope and I'm trying to infiltrate your Church

Are you actually saying that Italians are not White? Also, how come our God could hate Italians if he looks like one himself?

I have seen all of the Godfather movies and the Italians in them look more like Mexicans but I have no particular skills in identifying the races of people from Europe. I have always thought Italy was a Mexican country.


Also Jah is a Black man not a white man or even an Italian. He is everliving and can be found in Abyssinia even today where he lives as a monk. But I had better not go too much into that fact because my Baptist friends will grow angry with me and I will be under rebuke.

[Didymus Much]

Re: I worship The Poope and I'm trying to infiltrate your Church

Are you actually saying that Italians are not White? Also, how come our God could hate Italians if he looks like one himself?

I'd thought that Landoverians were the epitome of not understanding basic logic.


I was wrong.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: I worship The Poope and I'm trying to infiltrate your Church

Our Lady never died, she ascended in Heaven in old age.

This is one of my very favorite Catholic mythology stories! This is the story of a woman whose death was, according to the Roman Catholic Church, accompanied by all the Apostles, attended to by virgins, and even witnessed by 15,000 townies, every single one of which forgot to ever mention this glorious event historical records, art, song, building dedication, coins, or even personal letters, ever again!

According to Catholic lore, St. John the Theologian tells of a grand event in which all the Apostles, even those dead! Were *poofed* right back into Ephesus to witness the death and ascension of the soul of Mary, the mother of God. Jesus came in a cloud of glory with a whole chorus of angels. Remember how He'll come back in glory to judge the living and the dead? Catholics repeat this every time they attend the Mass, but have no idea that according to Catholic belief, He already did come, forgot to judge anyone, and left again, this time with the soul of Mary in the passenger seat of His flying cloud!

Mary's body, by the way, remained in the home for the mourners to see and venerate. When the local head Jew got pissed off, he attempted to throw the bier over, but when he touched it, his arms shriveled up to his elbows, fell off his body, and stuck to the coffin like human fly paper while the Apostles carried around the dead body! Can you imagine anything so outrageously goofy and hilarious! Jew body parts hanging off the coffin of Mary, like bicycle streamers! I love Catholic imagination!

That is, unless you consider another Catholic account in which Mary was only 64, and died peacefully at home. Considering this hallucination vision was "witnessed" by a woman in the 19th century, one who clearly had never heard the whole "Jesus coming on a cloud with a whole angelic marching band" version, one might understandably be confused about which delusional vision is to be believed! Best to simply focus on the idea that Mary ascended into Heaven and not pay attention to the details!

Poor Catholics, always having to trust someone in authority to tell them what's going on because they lack any evidence, or even logic, to string together one, single, coherent story through the ages!

Anyway, welcome to our friendly forums! I was once a Latin-spewing, speed-bead praying, relic obsessed, ring-kissing papist too, but then found me and raised me up from the depths of the delusion and Saved me! I pray He will spare you, too! So great is His Mercy!

Are you actually saying that Italians are not White? Also, how come our God could hate Italians if he looks like one himself?

Italians don't look like that. That was clearly inspired by norther European beauty. The Italian man has unashamedly donned the same look for millennia. You know why they wear mustaches, right? To look like their mothers.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: A new saved soul

Mary is not a dead woman, she is the spouse of Christ, the Queen of Heaven and our mother.

The queen of heaven is mentioned five times in the King James Bible. All such mentions are in the Book of Jeremiah and refer to a pagan deity, worship of whom provokes God to anger. You've basically admitted that your "Mary" is not the Mary of the Bible, but instead a pagan deity.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: A new saved soul

She is the spouse of her own kid?

Not quite, Sister. She was, according to Catholic lore, spouse to the Holy Spirit.

In a sense her journey of faith is longer. The Holy Spirit had already come down upon her, and she became his faithful spouse at the Annunciation

Of course this gets messy when one opts to read what Jesus Himself has to say about this in the Holy Bible:

Now the birth of Jesus Christ was on this wise: When as his mother Mary was espoused to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Ghost.
Matthew 1:18

We can see that by Catholic reckoning, Mary was espoused to both the Holy Spirit, and Joseph at the same time. We know that espousal, or betrothal, does not precede marriage, but is an integral part of it. Not only was she polyamorous like the modern day New Atheist Richard Carrier, she got herself knocked up before ever becoming an honest woman. Perhaps this explains why Jesus hated her so.

[Elmer G. White]

Re: I worship The Poope and I'm trying to infiltrate your Church

Mr. Romeo,

First, please let me congratulate you on your decision to join God's Favorite Discussion Board. It must have been a very hard decision as every organelle and capillary vessel of your body that has been abused by Satan for so many years must be screaming like an impaled pagan savage trying to keep you away from the True Word™ of God. It is also understandable that your soul is fighting desperately to maintain your delusions (2 Thessalonians 2:11) caused by the initial step of choosing the Catholic Cult over Christianity™. You are, I must admit, giving us a decent fight albeit in vain as we have no opinions but only the True Bible® to lead us along. We are protected by Jesus who cannot be defeated.



How come you're here despite the almost total saturation of sin caused by your Cult? Is there an Entity that could have led you here despite all the soaking in false doctrine? There is. Jesus.



Jesus has brought you here because only we as True Christians™ can show you the Way to Repentance and Salvation (John 14:6). Please accept our unconditional love to gain the Conditional Love (John 3:18) of Jesus Christ!

You are not the first Papist to visit our Forum. In fact, we have a regular intruder, Mr. Maurice Lester who harasses us at irregular intervals whenever he can spare a few minutes between altar boys. He is one of the Papists who have failed to answer in a reasonable manner the most pivotal questions that make Catholics different from Christians™. Perhaps you'd be kind enough to assess them rationally, as you seem to be able to keep your calm. By "rational" I mean based on Scripture.

Here are the issues. How do you justify these pieces of Catholic doctrine? These issues can be read in your Catechism, and in the encyclicals and speeches of your Leaders.

1. Atheists can be Saved (you don't have to believe anything and you still get to go into Heaven; Jesus disagrees in John 3:18; John 14:6).
2. Muslims can be Saved (you can deny the Trinity and the Divine Nature of Christ and still go into Heaven; Jesus disagrees in John 3:15-18; John 14:6).
3. The only Truth™ is evolution (you can disregard the Fall [Genesis 3:6] and the need to reconciliation, i.e., Jesus; Jesus disagrees in John 3:16-18).
4. Jesus was incapable of transmitting His Thoughts in a rational manner and the Catholic leaders have to choose the correct ones - which makes the Bible susceptible in its entirety (2 Peter 1:20 disagrees).
5. Catholic Terrorism: Throughout history, 99% of all terrorist acts have been conducted by either Catholics or Muslims. On the Catholic side (they invented modern terrorism) we have, e.g., the IRA, the ETA, and many others. On the Muslim side, there is Al-Qaeda, ISIS, and many others. We know what Jesus thinks about these people (Matthew 7:16). Based on that verse, the No True Scotsman won't save you.

Now, it is unfortunately quite legal to believe that the Bible is insufficient, but if you wish to spread your Cult among us, you should be able to explain why the passages of the Bible listed above can be disregarded, and if they can, what is the point? If everyone is Saved anyway, why do you bother preaching anything? Your job would be just another form of boring and outdated commedia dell'arte.

Please do not get me wrong, I think that there is promise in you. You could become a part of the True Christian™ Community if you delved into these matters for your own sake and re-defined your position after careful Bible Study.




Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Romeo Rovagnati]

Re: A new saved soul

Why?

From my point of view, your Bible is corrupted because you have been adding and diminishing from the Word of God, and He doesn't like that (Deuteronomy 4:2, Proverbs 30:5-6, Revelation 22:18-19).

Yes, but do not forget when Noah added the rule that the Cananites must be slaves of semites (Genesis 9:20-27).

Also, do not forget that most of the Bible is the old god word. He needs someone to update it.

Why?
Do you know that your church has even modified the Ten Commandments so you could keep praying to statues? Therefore, do not preach about accepting sacred scriptures. You don't even follow the version of the Bible you deem to be the correct one!

Our church never modified the Ten Commandaments. They always were:

1. You shall have no other gods before me
2. You shall not take
   the name of the LORD your God in vain
3. Remember to keep holy the LORD'S Day (Sunday).
4. Honor your father and your mother.
5. You shall not kill.
6. You shall not commit adultery.
7. You shall not steal.
8. You shall not bear false witness
   against your neighbor.
9. You shall not covet
   your neighbor's wife.
10. You shall not covet
    your neighbor's goods.

Again, we don't pray statues, we use them just to represent Jesus.

Why?
But - while wars are usually started for geopolitical and/or economical reasons, religion is a huge factor why people participate in wars and do not, for example, throw their hands in the air at the first sight of the enemy.

Also, read up about the children's crusade. It was a bunch of kids being sent to the Holy Land where they ended up being sold as slaves, all that because in their minds while adult men could not win the war because they were corrupted, the children were supposed to win because of their innocence. Innocent they were, I'm sure they made great slaves.

Our Saint Abrahm was asked to sacrifice his son to God. Did he refuse? He was forced, likewise we did as well. I'm sure that those children are enjoying Heaven with Jesus spreading his love, since they where obedient slaves (Ephenesians 6:5)

Also, do you realize if we didn't make our Holy Crusades you would be ruled by the Muslims?

Exodus 22:18 Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live.

Great, except they weren't real witches at all. If they really were witches they would have used a spell to turn off the fire. But clearly they weren't witches, they were Catholic women and Nuns, and those bribes of Christ were murdered by the evil Calvin and Luther worshippers.

If you knew anything about the Holy Bible, you should have known that genocide is a good thing when God mandates it.

Exodus 17:14-16
14 And the Lord said unto Moses, Write this for a memorial in a book, and rehearse it in the ears of Joshua: for I will utterly put out the remembrance of Amalek from under heaven.
15 And Moses built an altar, and called the name of it Jehovahnissi:
16 For he said, Because the Lord hath sworn that the Lord will have war with Amalek from generation to generation.

Luke 19:27 But those mine enemies, which would not that I should reign over them, bring hither, and slay them before me.

Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.

So, according to you, it is not okay to make war in the name of the Holy Roman Catholic Church, but it is okay to make war in the name of the Protestant Churches? This is a sin. (Matthew 24:51)

Also, do you realize that our enemies during were almost at our same level? The only thing they missed was Jesus on their side. Sure, we had the earlier technologies, but those Pre-Nazi barbarians had a brutal strenght.

Your Native American Genocide on the other hand was arrow vs tanks.

I believe in the Holy Bible. What else should I need to believe in?

So, does this means that you believe that Donald Trump does not exist just because he is not in the Bible?

Give me a Bible quote or admit that you're wrong!

I've already done earlier, unfortunately you Mary-haters Luther-worshippers costantly deny the truth.

I ask myself the same question and cannot find a logical answer (and I had two years of Latin in high school).

True Christians always have the answers.

How are Easter eggs and bunnies Biblical? How is Christmas tree Biblical?

The eggs and bunnies are just there to convince little children to participate Easter. The Christmas tree is not Biblical on the other hand because we don't celebrate "Christmas".

That was not the saints (most of them never existed in the first place, or are you suggesting that pagan gods were actually living at some point in time?), this was people who wrote the hagiographies.

Mother Theresa appeard on TV screens, is this an enough proof that Saints existed? I think so.

Also, how about Saint Andrew cross who keeps saving people from train's crashes?

OK, you got me now. How many spheres do you think there are in Heaven? (And why do you think there are any spheres in Heaven?)

There are exactly nine spheres in Heaven. Also, do you really think that our God would give an equal reward to all people just because they were Christians?

Then why are you using that verse implying that your pope is supposed to be regarded as the sole shepherd?

Because Jesus chosed the Pope to represent him on earth.

Do you have any actual proof of that, or are you going to draw me another picture and try to sell it to me as "proof?"

[/QUOTE]

Nope, because we have your pastors in jail.

According to Catholic lore, St. John the Theologian tells of a grand event in which all the Apostles, even those dead! Were *poofed* right back into Ephesus to witness the death and ascension of the soul of Mary, the mother of God. Jesus came in a cloud of glory with a whole chorus of angels. Remember how He'll come back in glory to judge the living and the dead? Catholics repeat this every time they attend the Mass, but have no idea that according to Catholic belief, He already did come, forgot to judge anyone, and left again, this time with the soul of Mary in the passenger seat of His flying cloud!

Mary's body, by the way, remained in the home for the mourners to see and venerate. When the local head Jew got pissed off, he attempted to throw the bier over, but when he touched it, his arms shriveled up to his elbows, fell off his body, and stuck to the coffin like human fly paper while the Apostles carried around the dead body! Can you imagine anything so outrageously goofy and hilarious! Jew body parts hanging off the coffin of Mary, like bicycle streamers! I love Catholic imagination!

That is, unless you consider another Catholic account in which Mary was only 64, and died peacefully at home. Considering this hallucination vision was "witnessed" by a woman in the 19th century, one who clearly had never heard the whole "Jesus coming on a cloud with a whole angelic marching band" version, one might understandably be confused about which delusional vision is to be believed!

It's one of the two story, it's up to you to decide. Also, you must never say blasphemies against the Holy Virgin Mary, it is a sin. (Luke 1:48)

Anyway, welcome to our friendly forums! I was once a Latin-spewing, speed-bead praying, relic obsessed, ring-kissing papist too, but then found me and raised me up from the depths of the delusion and Saved me! I pray He will spare you, too! So great is His Mercy!

I will pray for you as well, but for your re-conversion to Catholic Christianity. We are the winning Church, our ex enemies such as ex-pastor Alex Jones and ex-anglican Bishop Newman proves it. You are always in time to ask your forgiveness to Our Lady before her son decides to destroy your church for oversinning.

[Romeo Rovagnati]

Re: A new saved soul

The queen of heaven is mentioned five times in the King James Bible. All such mentions are in the Book of Jeremiah and refer to a pagan deity, worship of whom provokes God to anger. You've basically admitted that your "Mary" is not the Mary of the Bible, but instead a pagan deity.

This is a claim that most Hateists and Protestupids say. Our is a Monoteistic religion, we worship only the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Mary is not a goddes like many of you Protestupids or Hateists says, she is a saint. If she ever was a Goddess, she would have born as that.

Perhaps this explains why Jesus hated her so.

Our Lord hates only seven things (Proverbs 6:16), so he couldn't hate his own mother. Also, Jesus could never broke his own laws, since he himself said that you must honor the father and the mother.

It is also understandable that your soul is fighting desperately to maintain your delusions (2 Thessalonians 2:11) caused by the initial step of choosing the Catholic Cult over Christianity™.

Catholicism is the True Christianity™, but you Mary-haters Luther-worshippers are so blinded that you don't realize that verse talks about you.

You are, I must admit, giving us a decent fight albeit in vain as we have no opinions but only the True Bible® to lead us along. We are protected by Jesus who cannot be defeated.

You are not protected by Jesus but by the Antichrist who pretends to be Jesus. Abandon your false religion and join to the universal church.

How come you're here despite the almost total saturation of sin caused by your Cult? Is there an Entity that could have led you here despite all the soaking in false doctrine? There is. Jesus.

Actually i came here because i tought that this was a baptism site, not a baptist site. But after learning that you are Calvin-worshippers i realized i must do something to convert you to the true faith.

Jesus has brought you here because only we as True Christians™ can show you the Way to Repentance and Salvation (John 14:6). Please accept our unconditional love to gain the Conditional Love (John 3:18) of Jesus Christ!

Or maybe Jesus has brought me here because only i as True Christian™ can show you the Way to Repentance and Salvation (John 14:6). Please accept our unconditional love to gain the Conditional Love (John 3:18) of Jesus Christ!

Perhaps you'd be kind enough to assess them rationally, as you seem to be able to keep your calm. By "rational" I mean based on Scripture.

Are you sayin that our Church didn't have the Bible? If it weren't for us the Jews would have used the books who compose the Old Testament as a toilet paper.

Here are the issues. How do you justify these pieces of Catholic doctrine? These issues can be read in your Catechism, and in the encyclicals and speeches of your Leaders.

1. Atheists can be Saved (you don't have to believe anything and you still get to go into Heaven; Jesus disagrees in John 3:18; John 14:6).
2. Muslims can be Saved (you can deny the Trinity and the Divine Nature of Christ and still go into Heaven; Jesus disagrees in John 3:15-18; John 14:6).
3. The only Truth™ is evolution (you can disregard the Fall [Genesis 3:6] and the need to reconciliation, i.e., Jesus; Jesus disagrees in John 3:16-18).
4. Jesus was incapable of transmitting His Thoughts in a rational manner and the Catholic leaders have to choose the correct ones - which makes the Bible susceptible in its entirety (2 Peter 1:20 disagrees).
5. Catholic Terrorism: Throughout history, 99% of all terrorist acts have been conducted by either Catholics or Muslims. On the Catholic side (they invented modern terrorism) we have, e.g., the IRA, the ETA, and many others. On the Muslim side, there is Al-Qaeda, ISIS, and many others. We know what Jesus thinks about these people (Matthew 7:16). Based on that verse, the No True Scotsman won't save you.

1. They will not directly go to Heaven, they will go to Purgatory to redeem themself first.
2. Same, just they will have an advantage over Atheists because they in part believed in Jesus and opposed Homobestiality.
3. Evolution is not the only truth, it is just part of the truth: (Example: the wagon evolved into the car).
4. He transmitted his toughts to many people, just ask a Catholic woman who was in hospital and then saw Jesus in her dream and then woke up perfectly fine. Also, many of our Saints have talked to Jesus, like Saint Gemma Galgani.
5. Catholics never makes terrorism. The Catholic Church never created those groups, they were made for political purpose. How could Catholicism be terroristic if it was the religion of nobles. And please, don't start associanting Fascism with the Catholic Church. On the other hand, Protestants costantly commits terrorism, since their religion is nothing more than carbon-copy of the Sunny Islam, they just changed the symbol and the book. Also, are you forgetting that Christianity main symbol is the Latin Cross? Guess who invented it.

If everyone is Saved anyway, why do you bother preaching anything? Your job would be just another form of boring and outdated commedia dell'arte.

Because, while you won't end in Hell, you'll still end in Purgatory, wich means you would have to suffer anyway. Tough, you'll enter in Heaven after some years at least.

Amen.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: A new saved soul

Because, while you won't end in Hell, you'll still end in Purgatory, wich means you would have to suffer anyway. Tough, you'll enter in Heaven after some years at least.

Even your Pope Benedict said that Purgatory isn't a place.


This is the same Pope who, in 2007, abolished Limbo. And quite right too.

[Romeo Rovagnati]

Re: A new saved soul

Even your Pope Benedict said that Purgatory isn't a place.


This is the same Pope who, in 2007, abolished Limbo. And quite right too.

I've almost forgotten it. Well, it is a good thing anyway, since you Mary-blasphemers will go to Heavent anyway. Too bad that you will be in the lowest sphere.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: I worship The Poope and I'm trying to infiltrate your Church

Buon Giorno, Romeo,


As someone who is now thankfully (ALL Glory to God) an ex-cathylick, I am not surprised by your lack of understanding regarding certain doctrines of the faith.


Of course, someone who fashions themselves to be a priest - which clearly will be determined by the Dept of Faith as to the validity of that statement - should have a better grip on what you claim to be true. Perhaps you were training altar boys and too busy to actually learn something during seminary. (Or, more appropriately, semen-ary.)


Since you are headed for hell and not the fake purgatory that the church tries to justify based on books that are not in the actual Bible, I will pray for your soul's Salvation(R) but you are not displaying the demeanor of someone truly in search of God's will. I can only hope you will see me waving at you from Heaven's pizza parlor as you fan the flames of perdition while satan injects his barbed genitalia into your waiting nether regions. Praise!


COME, LORD JESUS!
BrotherLarry

[Leroy Llewelyn]

Re: A new saved soul

I worship The Poope and I'm trying to infiltrate your Church

Sounds like you're on the fast track to the Lake of Fire, friend. I suggest you abandon your evil ways, and that right quick.

Matthew 15:8-9King James Version (KJV)

8 This people draweth nigh unto me with their mouth, and honoureth me with their lips; but their heart is far from me.
9 But in vain they do worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men.

[handmaiden]

Re: A new saved soul

You seem to be confusing Landover Baptist Church with Westboro Baptist Church.


Have you been at the communion wine?

Indeed, Sister, there are so many things that those Westborons do that is not Biblical. It boggles the mind that they call themselves True Christians.


It is absurd the number of people out there who think that they alone are right and that they are the only ones practicing "the one true religion".


We here at Landover Baptist know better. We are the only True Christians, because we read and heed the Whole Word of God which He revealed Himself in His Holy Bible.


.


That's all it takes, really. So very simple. And yet,the simpletons of the world don't see it.


Eyes Wide Openedly Yours,


Handmaiden

[Romeo Rovagnati]

Re: I worship The Poope and I'm trying to infiltrate your Church

Since you are headed for hell and not the fake purgatory that the church tries to justify based on books that are not in the actual Bible, I will pray for your soul's Salvation® but you are not displaying the demeanor of someone truly in search of God's will. I can only hope you will see me waving at you from Heaven's pizza parlor as you fan the flames of perdition while satan injects his barbed genitalia into your waiting nether regions. Praise!

I will also pray for you. Also Purgatory is 75% Biblical. (Matthew 4:8), (2 Maccabees 12:38), (1 Chronicles 9:20), (1 Corinthians 3:15), (Numbers 20:1), (Deuteronomy 34:4), (2 Samuel 12:1-5).

Matthew 15:8-9King James Version (KJV)

See, you've openly admitted that you're not worshipping Jesus, but John Calvin.

In the name of the Father, the Son and Holy Spirit.

Amen.