[Humongous]

Re: Hello to All from a magic-undie-wearing cultist.

Well, one of you jehovo witnesses came a knockin on my trailer door again, so i started brandishin daddy's (RIP) blunderbuss what i keep loaded with gunpowder and used kitty litter? well, he dropped his pamphlets and started a runnin! not fast enuff though! so i fired a warnin shot directly into his buttcheeks? HOOWEE! for his sake, i hope your Hellbound church a latterday saints has got cushioned pews!



and thanks for the pamphlets, they 2 ply.


Yours in Christ,
Lori H

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Hello to All from a magic-undie-wearing cultist.

Well first and for most, I praise the lord just as you True Christians, which I believe you go by. I am of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints though. Similarities to you all. I just believe in the Book of Mormon, and if you dont that is alright. To each their own.

To each their own?

So, is the Book of Mormon right, or is it not right?

It conflicts with the Bible. They can't both be right.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Hello to All from a magic-undie-wearing cultist.

Well first and for most, I praise the lord just as you True Christians, which I believe you go by. I am of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints though. Similarities to you all. I just believe in the Book of Mormon, and if you dont that is alright. To each their own.

Ill be sure to be an active christian and help spread the good word of the gospel with you brethren.

Well friend, welcome to the forum. I am not sure what to say after this beyond I pray you will accept TRUE Christian(tm) and reveled threw the Divine Revelation of Jesus.

One question about Mormonism you might be able to help me on, what is this about three heavens? It sounds like that's a bit Buddhist to me.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: Hello to All!

Nevertheless, who are you to judge, Levi? You are a mere mortal just like every single earthborn one of us. The only one who can truly judge us is Heavenly Father.

I see that someone didn't read the thread that you are supposed to read before posting.

[ExGay Alex]

Re: Hello to All!

I rightly point out that Christ, the perfect being, told people of their wrong doings, so it is okay. None of us are perfect. So we cant be correct 100% of the time. We will be wrong in life. Unless Christ talks directly to you everyday, which he doesnt, then you do not have the rights to tell people that everything they do is wrong and they will go to hell for what they are doing. God is the judge of whether the go to hell or not. Not you.

We do not pass judgment on you. We do not send anyone to hell. Just as I, who am not a criminal court judge, cannot sentence you for burning a Bible in a public school. But does that prevent me from reading the law and making a prediction about what the court will do when they have you dead to rights?

Yes, friend. God is the judge, not us. But if you have read the Bible, as we have, then you, too, would know that God will smite you into the lake of fire with 100% certainty and you are going to fry like an egg while being sodomized by demons for eternity.

There is still time. Turn to Jesus before it is too late.

[Pastor Ed Lowman]

Re: Hello to All!

Well, not very Christ like of you to say that. Seeing as you are "Christians." Christ would have never insulted anybody like that. He was a perfect being in all. And isn't it all our goals to be more Christ-like? The sacred being, who didnt refuse anyone. He healed sick, poor, unrighteous, sinners alike. He didn't care if they were Jewish or not, because he did his best to help every possible person he could. No matter what their issue is. Im afraid to say it, but you give Christians a bad name.

Welcome, Boysenberry. You seem very much like those young, wet-behind-the-ears 19-year-old "elders" who come to my gate and ask to be let in. I always let them in and sit them on my cougar-skin couch and let them know (like I'm letting you know now) that since they are not preaching the gospel Paul preached (Galatians 1:8-9), they are in no sense Christian. They - and you - might as well be welfare-mooching Mexicans bringing Tuberculosis instead of a soul-saving message.

Your message will take no one to heaven. You worship a mythical being who lives in space. It can't be God because God says so...

"Ye are my witnesses, saith the LORD, and my servant whom I have chosen: that ye may know and believe me, and understand that I am he: before me there was no God formed, neither shall there be after me." (Isaiah 43:10)

Bye bye, eternal progression myth!

And we are not insulting you. We just don't want to see your young, nubile body and soul roast forever with Joseph Smith and his brother and old Brigham Young. It may be too late for them, but it is our wish that you repent before Jesus kills you, son.

Pastor Ed

[Noah Sole]

Re: Hello to All!

I rightly point out that Christ, the perfect being, told people of their wrong doings, so it is okay. None of us are perfect. So we cant be correct 100% of the time. We will be wrong in life. Unless Christ talks directly to you everyday, which he doesnt, then you do not have the rights to tell people that everything they do is wrong and they will go to hell for what they are doing. God is the judge of whether the go to hell or not. Not you.

Hello Boysenberry, welcome to God's favourite forum

It's always interesting to have a member of another religion come and visit us and tell us about their quaint customs and things. What's with the book? How can you follow a book that was only written in 1827 and yet you quote from our book that was translated into God's English in 1611?

Another thing I don't understand is the underpants thing, I saw some of these the other day - do you wear them? If so why? What's their purpose?



All the best

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Hello to All!

I rightly point out that Christ, the perfect being, told people of their wrong doings, so it is okay. None of us are perfect. So we cant be correct 100% of the time. We will be wrong in life. Unless Christ talks directly to you everyday, which he doesnt, then you do not have the rights to tell people that everything they do is wrong and they will go to hell for what they are doing. God is the judge of whether the go to hell or not. Not you.

Mormoons are not Christians, that's a fact.

I urge you to repent.

If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.

[Boysenberry]

Re: Hello to All!

You rightly point out that it is acceptable to inform people of their wrongdoings. Has any True Christian™ done otherwise to you?

I rightly point out that Christ, the perfect being, told people of their wrong doings, so it is okay. None of us are perfect. So we cant be correct 100% of the time. We will be wrong in life. Unless Christ talks directly to you everyday, which he doesnt, then you do not have the rights to tell people that everything they do is wrong and they will go to hell for what they are doing. God is the judge of whether the go to hell or not. Not you.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Hello to All!

But he gives them wisdom rather than insults. He lets them know of their wrong doings. Christ wouldnt insult anybody like that, is what I was reaching for. Nevertheless, who are you to judge, Levi? You are a mere mortal just like every single earthborn one of us. The only one who can truly judge us is Heavenly Father. Who knows of all our mistakes and triumphs. You didnt create earth and all its beings. He did.

You rightly point out that it is acceptable to inform people of their wrongdoings. Has any True Christian(tm) done otherwise to you?

[Boysenberry]

Re: Hello to All!

1 Peter 4:14

But saying Jesus didn't insult people is wrong. Pretty much all of Matthew 23.

But he gives them wisdom rather than insults. He lets them know of their wrong doings. Christ wouldnt insult anybody like that, is what I was reaching for. Nevertheless, who are you to judge, Levi? You are a mere mortal just like every single earthborn one of us. The only one who can truly judge us is Heavenly Father. Who knows of all our mistakes and triumphs. You didnt create earth and all its beings. He did.

[Catherine Moore]

Re: Hello to All!

1 Peter 4:14

But saying Jesus didn't insult people is wrong. Pretty much all of Matthew 23.

[Boysenberry]

Re: Hello to All!

No, not to each his own!

Galatians 1:8-9 But though we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursed.
As we said before, so say I now again, if any man preach any other gospel unto you than that ye have received, let him be accursed.

I don't know why you people even bother with the nice act, when you're hell bound heathens anyway. You may as well strip off the magical underwear and have a giant gay orgy in Salt Lake City for all the good your mormonism will do you.

Well, not very Christ like of you to say that. Seeing as you are "Christians." Christ would have never insulted anybody like that. He was a perfect being in all. And isn't it all our goals to be more Christ-like? The sacred being, who didnt refuse anyone. He healed sick, poor, unrighteous, sinners alike. He didn't care if they were Jewish or not, because he did his best to help every possible person he could. No matter what their issue is. Im afraid to say it, but you give Christians a bad name.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Hello to All!

No, not to each his own!

Galatians 1:8-9 But though we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursed.
As we said before, so say I now again, if any man preach any other gospel unto you than that ye have received, let him be accursed.

I don't know why you people even bother with the nice act, when you're hell bound heathens anyway. You may as well strip off the magical underwear and have a giant gay orgy in Salt Lake City for all the good your mormonism will do you.

[Boysenberry]

Re: Hello to All!

Almost forgot, my favorite bible verse is Ecclesiastes 3:15. Due to the Deja Vu stuff and what not.