Blessed be the Lord

[Young Peter]

Re: Blessed be the Lord

Hello Reverend Kwimbonzo. I hear there are many problems with warlocks in Uganda. Have you ever been a victim of mind control?

[Professor Bessemer]

Re: Blessed be the Lord

Five years after I moved to America I renounced my Negroidal lifestyle and began to serve Jesus; I haven't stolen a pie or raped white women since. I am blessed and thankful to be able to say that I am an Ex-Negro©.

I am glad to hear that you have renounced your former lifestyle of thuggery and sexual assault so common to those hailing from the Dark Continent. But I would suggest that, to avoid backsliding into a life of crime and interracial lust, you must keep your focus on Jesus. You should also avoid fried chicken and watermelon just to be sure.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Blessed be the Lord

Hey there Auggie! Do you have a lot of white girls in your congregation, and is it a struggle for you to avoid looking down their shirts?

[Russell Holbeck]

Re: Blessed be the Lord

Hello Rev. Augustus Kwembe. I did not know where Uganda is so I looked it up. Your flag has the same colors as Germany but their flag does not have a chicken on it.

Thank you.

Rusty

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Blessed be the Lord

Where were you ordained, boy? Sears and Roebucks?

If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.

[Rev. Augustus Kwembe]

Re: Blessed be the Lord

Five years after I moved to America I renounced my Negroidal lifestyle and began to serve Jesus; I haven't stolen a pie or raped white women since. I am blessed and thankful to be able to say that I am an Ex-Negro©.

[Professor Bessemer]

Re: Blessed be the Lord

Hello my friends. I am the Reverend Augustus Kwembe. I come from Uganda but I now reside in Colorado (filled with filthy pot-smoking communist hippies).
I come to this forum wishing to share with you our love for Jesus Christ our Savior.

When did you renounce your Negroidal lifestyle and choose to serve Jesus? Does the primal urge to rape white women and steal pies ever bubble up from your savage unconscious, or are you a completely cured Ex-Negro(c)?

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Blessed be the Lord

Hello and welcome to our friendly forums!



Have you discovered how you can use running water and a bar of soap to clean yourself in the privacy of your own home? Isn't America wonderful!

[Rev. Augustus Kwembe]

Re: Blessed be the Lord

Praise Jesus!

My favorite passage is Proverbs 6:16-19
"These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief, A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren."


My favorite American food is a cheeseburger. Delicious.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Blessed be the Lord

Praise the Lord and welcome, boy.

What is your favorite verse from God's Holy Word?

What is your favorite all American food since you came over here?

[Rev. Augustus Kwembe]

Hello my friends. I am the Reverend Augustus Kwembe. I come from Uganda but I now reside in Colorado (filled with filthy pot-smoking communist hippies).
I come to this forum wishing to share with you our love for Jesus Christ our Savior.