Yeast infection

[Roland]

I am not sure if I am allowed to post here but this seems the most applicable forum.


It started when I got a small package of dried yeast. The instructions on the package told me to dissolve it in luke warm milk with a pinch of sugar and salt. I might have made a mistake there, Revelation 3:15-16 does not advise that. No harm so far: The milk smelled nice, some bubbles did occur.


After half an hour it got a bit funky so I asked the internet to advise me. On their advise I added a pound of flour, 25 grams of sugar, 10 grams of salt and 50 grams of butter. This only made it worse. Now I have a blob that keeps getting bigger. How do I kill this experiment? With fire? My oven does 250C.

[Dennis Lukes]

Re: Yeast infection

If you had ever bothered to read the Lord's Holy Word, you would know that God hates leavened bread more than pretty much anything (Exodus 12:15, Deuteronomy 16:3, 1 Corinthians 5:6-8, Leviticus 23:6, Luke 12:1, Matthew 26:17).

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Yeast infection

If you had ever bothered to read the Lord's Holy Word, you would know that God hates leavened bread more than pretty much anything (Exodus 12:15, Deuteronomy 16:3, 1 Corinthians 5:6-8, Leviticus 23:6, Luke 12:1, Matthew 26:17).

Pearls before swine, Brother Dennis.

[WWJDnow]

Re: Yeast infection

Brother Roland, I'll leave it up to the good ladies of Landover to advise you, but I think the standard method for ridding oneself of undesired yeast is to rinse the area daily with a solution of water and vinegar. But let this be a lesson to you--a man should not be in the kitchen, just as a woman should not be in the workplace.

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

Re: Yeast infection

But let this be a lesson to you--a man should not be in the kitchen***

*** Except insofar as to provide guidance on the amount of salt to add (more).

[Basilissa]

Re: Yeast infection

After half an hour it got a bit funky so I asked the internet to advise me. On their advise I added a pound of flour, 25 grams of sugar, 10 grams of salt and 50 grams of butter. This only made it worse. Now I have a blob that keeps getting bigger. How do I kill this experiment? With fire? My oven does 250C.

I recommend 45 minutes in the oven at 450 F (230 C). This is what I do when I have a yeast infection on flour, water, honey, and salt mixture; it might be less for a mixture that includes milk and butter. Put the dish with yeast infected mixture in cold oven, close the door and then set the temperature as well as your timer. Make sure your dish is not going to melt or shatter in the heat. I highly recommend cast iron.

After 40 minutes, the whole kitchen will be filled with a rather strange smell. Bear with it - this is the sign that the yeast is well dead. That's a good thing, this is what you wanted. Basically, that's the smell of the yeast decomposing corpse. Wait 5 more minutes, turn off the oven and get the yeast infected thing from the oven. Take it out of the dish onto a wooden board. Wait 5 more minutes and cut through it.

You will see a lot of holes inside the thing. Do you know what these holes are???

You won't believe it!!

These are yeast farts! Yes: yeast farts!!! As the yeast consumes flour and water mixture, it farts all over the place! Isn't that just abhorring????