[Brother Lazarus]

Re: Conversation with Jesus

The person in front of me today in the post office wants sending to hell. he was a filthy creature, ogled part of my person that a husband only should. He was on foot, obviously too poor for the subway and the smell that he emitted made me think that he frequents hell quite a bit. Namely The Nags Head.

I'm guessing he was some sort of French bohemian.

Yours in Christ
Brother Lazarus

[Widow Green]

Re: Conversation with Jesus

Dear Widow Green, do you often talk with Jesus ?. I do, I think that is what brought me here.

I always talk to Jesus Angels, he is always around in my time of need. He is the only one that has never let me down despite him taking my poor unfortunate husbands away too soon, but that is not for me to judge. I'm sure it was meant to be in his great scheme for me. I ask daily for him to lead me to a husband and to let this one stay a while too. I fear that if another meets a sudden end the authorities wont look too kindly next time.

Good luck with your budding friendship with Johnnyboy and a fruitful outcome

[Satanica]

Re: Conversation with Jesus

sometimes we ride motorcycles to hell.

[Ugly_Kid_Joe]

Re: Conversation with Jesus

sometimes we ride motorcycles to hell.

I think you are mistaking Mexico for Hell, perhaps?
Not that I blame you for that easy mistake.

[BabyDoc]

Re: Conversation with Jesus

BETTY: Jesus, pass me the Brunello. You've had quite enough. Tell me, darling, if you are all about love, as people keep saying over and over again, why do you send people to be tortured in Hell?

JESUS: Why do you care?

BETTY: As you well know: I don't. I'm just making preemptive conversation before you get going on one of those interminable parables of yours.

JESUS: I don't send people to Hell; they send themselves.

BETTY: Do they take a cab?

Betty Bowers, you blaspheme God with your ignorance. You would not be standing if Jesus was in your presence. You could not survive in the presence of God.

You are already on your way to Hell. When you do see Jesus He will say

Matthew 7:22 'I never knew you; DEPART FROM ME, YOU WHO PRACTICE LAWLESSNESS.'

You don't need to worry about a cab.

Matthew 13:41-42 "The Son of Man will send forth His angels, and they will gather out of His kingdom all stumbling blocks, and those who commit lawlessness, 42 and will throw them into the furnace of fire; in that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.

Betty bowers you need to repent and beleive the gospel.

[DeadonDemonDrool]

Re: Conversation with Jesus

BETTY: Jesus, pass me the Brunello. You've had quite enough. Tell me, darling, if you are all about love, as people keep saying over and over again, why do you send people to be tortured in Hell?

JESUS: Why do you care?

BETTY: As you well know: I don't. I'm just making preemptive conversation before you get going on one of those interminable parables of yours.

JESUS: I don't send people to Hell; they send themselves.

BETTY: Do they take a cab?

I thought they took a train? (or a highway?) ah hell I don't know anymore!

[Nobar King]

Re: Conversation with Jesus

I thought they took a train? (or a highway?) ah hell I don't know anymore!

At least you have been paying attention.

[DeadonDemonDrool]

Re: Conversation with Jesus

But, seriously I'm curious. Which is it?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Conversation with Jesus

Betty Bowers, you blaspheme God with your ignorance. You would not be standing if Jesus was in your presence. You could not survive in the presence of God.

You are already on your way to Hell. When you do see Jesus He will say

Matthew 7:22 'I never knew you; DEPART FROM ME, YOU WHO PRACTICE LAWLESSNESS.'

You don't need to worry about a cab.

Matthew 13:41-42 "The Son of Man will send forth His angels, and they will gather out of His kingdom all stumbling blocks, and those who commit lawlessness, 42 and will throw them into the furnace of fire; in that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.

Betty bowers you need to repent and beleive the gospel.

Mrs. Bowers believes in the entire Gospel, not just the bits she likes.

However, people choose Hell.

You see, they have the option of following every bit of God's Law and praising Jesus, in which case they can go to Heaven where they can serve Him forever and ever, singing His praises and worshipping Him in person!

Or, they can commit their sins. Then, at Judgment, Jesus will resurrect them from the dead so He can cast them into an unending, eternal life of indescribable torment.

This is how Jesus shows us how much He loves us. Not only do those of us who worship Him as He demands get to worship Him forever, but we also get to avoid being burned alive forever.

[SUV]

Re: Conversation with Jesus

Mrs Betty, I would "86" Jesus from this "Brunello" and encourage Him to go back to whichever Brand Name that He drunk during Biblical times.

But not so much of it that He again goes and gets Himself Crucified

Also, don't listen to this "Baby Doctor." It's my Considered Christian Opinion© that he is "Doctor" Spock, up on sabbatical from HELL