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  • SarahWeiben
    Unsaved trash
    • Jan 2011
    • 24

    #16
    Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

    Wow, these are really good tips! Maybe now I can learn to be a proper woman so that someday I may find my future husband! Thank you so very much!!

    Comment

    • Cranky Old Man
      Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
      You kids get off his lawn!
       
      • Jan 2010
      • 22378

      #17
      Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

      Originally posted by SarahWeiben View Post
      Wow, these are really good tips! Maybe now I can learn to be a proper woman so that someday I may find my future husband! Thank you so very much!!
      Do you have your husband's permission to visit this forum?
      5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
      To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
      James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

      Comment

      • SarahWeiben
        Unsaved trash
        • Jan 2011
        • 24

        #18
        Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

        Originally posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
        Do you have your husband's permission to visit this forum?
        Sadly I do not have a husband. I would ask my father, but he is a Catholic and he pretty much has disowned me. I do not agree with the Catholic teachings and want to be saved and not be damned for eternity, that is why I am here. So in a way you can say I almost have no father. (Except for God of course)

        Comment

        • Cornelius Blaze
          Confirmed Enemy of God
          • Jan 2011
          • 14

          #19
          Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

          Always swallow.

          Comment

          • JennySue
            Unsaved trash
            • Jan 2011
            • 16

            #20
            Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

            Thank you very much for these tips! I am only a few months shy of turning 16, and I want to be as prepared as I can for when I get married. I do not want to cause my future husband to get upset if I do not do something right, or anything like that. But with this information I can be sure that I will be the perfect wife for my husband.

            Comment

            • Jacobfromlost
              Confirmed Enemy of God
              BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
              • Jan 2011
              • 5

              #21
              Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

              Great thread, praise Jesus

              I was just wondering how do I get my wife to have my sandwich ready when I get home from work, and not start making it when I pull in the driveway (I'm very impatient). I tried beating her repeatedly and even put her in the hospital once or twice (my 'Jesus' hand is very strong) but she still hasn't learned...

              any tips from the women of landover?

              Comment

              • Felicity
                As pure and virginal as the driven snow.
                True Christian™
                • Apr 2010
                • 4834

                #22
                Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

                @Jacobfromlost Perhaps you should buy a clock for her!
                I Jesus!

                Comment

                • Jacobfromlost
                  Confirmed Enemy of God
                  BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                  • Jan 2011
                  • 5

                  #23
                  Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

                  Originally posted by Felicity View Post
                  @Jacobfromlost Perhaps you should buy a clock for her!
                  Great advice, praise Jesus, however we have many clocks in our home. Perhaps she is just a slow learner..sigh

                  I have another question. It says 'unsaved trash' and 'under investigation' under my user name, how do I change this?

                  Comment

                  • Brother Harold Porter
                    Landover Senior Outreach
                    Touching Men, Women and Children with the Good News!
                    True Christian™
                    • Jun 2010
                    • 8236

                    #24
                    Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

                    Originally posted by Jacobfromlost View Post
                    Great advice, praise Jesus, however we have many clocks in our home. Perhaps she is just a slow learner..sigh

                    I have another question. It says 'unsaved trash' and 'under investigation' under my user name, how do I change this?
                    Start witnessing for Jesus Christ! Small steps, my friend.
                    Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."

                    sigpic

                    Comment

                    • Daisy Mae Johnson
                      The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                      Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                      aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                      True Christian™
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 15708

                      #25
                      Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

                      If she were smart she'd prepare lots of them several days in advance and then all she would have to do is pull one out of the fridge, unwrap it, stick an olive on a tooth pick, insert it into the top of the sammy and then set it on a plate with chips, cottage cheese and a pickle. What's so hard about that?

                      Then again she may enjoy making them with your daughter to show her how to cook when she grows up.



                      Talk to your wife and tell her how lazy she is becoming and how unbecoming that is to Christ. Once should be enough. If you have to tell her again it's time to make it sting.

                      Good luck Brother. Your lunch should be on the table and ready for you by time you get home. If it is not, she is a whore.
                      sigpic

                      Tweet me Here
                      My GODLY Bio Here

                      Comment

                      • LizzyP
                        Confirmed Enemy of God
                        BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                        • Jan 2011
                        • 91

                        #26
                        Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

                        My fiance tells me that these are excellent tips! I shall keep these in mind so that I may please him in every way possible.

                        Comment

                        • Daisy Mae Johnson
                          The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                          Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                          aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                          True Christian™
                          • Sep 2006
                          • 15708

                          #27
                          Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

                          TIP

                          leaving dried bits of food on dirty dishes, not sweeping under the bed, not dusting thoughouly or leaving a ring around his collar can lead to demon infestation!

                          JESUS said in Matthew 12:43, "When the unclean spirit (demon) is gone OUT of a man, he walketh through dry places, seeking rest, and findeth none."
                          12:44 JESUS still talking - "Then he saith, I will return INTO my HOUSE from whence I came OUT; and when he is come, he findeth it empty, swept, and garnished." For a demon to come OUT, it had to be IN. JESUS also said that the demons consider YOU their HOUSE. They may have lived there for many years, and do not like to get evicted. This story is repeated in Luke 11:24-26
                          You don't want to be responsible for sending your family to HELL by inviting them into your house because you were lazy do you?
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                          • James Dewitt
                            #63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
                            • Jan 2010
                            • 6267

                            #28
                            Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

                            Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post
                            TIP

                            leaving dried bits of food on dirty dishes, not sweeping under the bed, not dusting thoughouly or leaving a ring around his collar can lead to demon infestation!



                            You don't want to be responsible for sending your family to HELL by inviting them into your house because you were lazy do you?
                            Sister you have that right!
                            When you wash dishes and have some "dried on" food on them, just wiping your dish rag over the dish does not remove it all. You must use some elbow grease, and may even require a "scrub pad" of some kind to remove it all.
                            Well, some demons are the same way. Just saying "come out in the name of JESUS" does not always insure a "clean plate". The demon may be "dried on" for some reason like being involved in witchcraft, holding unforgiveness, etc. This requires the "scrub pad" of the Holy Spirit, and maybe prayer and fasting, and a lot of time. We spent four hours of constant Spiritual Warfare on ONE demon before it left!
                            JESUS said in Matthew 12:43, "When the unclean spirit (demon) is gone OUT of a man, he walketh through dry places, seeking rest, and findeth none."
                            12:44 JESUS still talking - "Then he saith, I will return INTO my HOUSE from whence I came OUT; and when he is come, he findeth it empty, swept, and garnished." For a demon to come OUT, it had to be IN. JESUS also said that the demons consider YOU their HOUSE. They may have lived there for many years, and do not like to get evicted. This story is repeated in Luke 11:24-26. This is even King James Version! Don't give up the fight. Press on!

                            Comment

                            • LizzyP
                              Confirmed Enemy of God
                              BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                              • Jan 2011
                              • 91

                              #29
                              Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

                              Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post
                              TIP

                              leaving dried bits of food on dirty dishes, not sweeping under the bed, not dusting thoughouly or leaving a ring around his collar can lead to demon infestation!



                              You don't want to be responsible for sending your family to HELL by inviting them into your house because you were lazy do you?

                              I will have to be more careful then. I surely do not want to be responsible for that! Thank you for that very good tip Sister Daisy!

                              Comment

                              • BelieverInGod
                                Fourm Member
                                Forum Member
                                • Feb 2010
                                • 9269

                                #30
                                Re: Handy Tips for True Christian Wives

                                Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post
                                TIP

                                leaving dried bits of food on dirty dishes, not sweeping under the bed, not dusting thoughouly or leaving a ring around his collar can lead to demon infestation!



                                You don't want to be responsible for sending your family to HELL by inviting them into your house because you were lazy do you?
                                AMEN SISTER!

                                I have this quote on my bathroom mirror and read it every morning and night.

                                Ephesians 5:22-23 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

                                To me it means that I should clean my house like it was Jesus himself coming home and I should cook like I was going to serve Jesus the meal. Although, I will admit to skimping a bit when Seth is on the road, me and the boys can eat macaroni and cut up sausages once a week, it saves on the food budget.
                                Drama queen

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