[Bobby-Joe]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

Amen Bobby-Joe! I might remind our Christian Brothers and Sisters here that there was that old TV show "Baywatch" that featured slow motion scenes of scantily clad "Lifeguards" running on the beach with their "Big Cleavage" enticing over 1 billion viewers to commit the sin of Onanism. And where were the LIEbral's concern for the environment – not even the EPA was at all concerned about cleaning up that mess.

Lifeguards are nothing more than a "make work" government program that dates back to the socialist Roosevelt administration and is a drain on the economy. Lifeguards for the most part sit around idle waiting for something to happen and collect a pay check. All it does is create a dependency class so that Obama can rely on the "lifeguard vote" in the next election. Those efforts could be put to more productive use in the economy.

Exactly brother! Leave it to the liberals to pay people to do nothing. When Jesus reclaims America and ends the Obama Tribulation Presidency (worse than Carter) Jesus is going to apply the free market to lifegaurding; Lifegards will be paid by every person they save. None of this lazing about on the beach. They will be out there making sure people are drowning.

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

Here! Here!

This is Freehold, not Southern California. We don't need our children faking drowning just to get some oiled up muscle men in speedos to suck face on them in public! Lifeguards are just socialism for the gay lifestyle, nothing more.

Amen Bobby-Joe! I might remind our Christian Brothers and Sisters here that there was that old TV show "Baywatch" that featured slow motion scenes of scantily clad "Lifeguards" running on the beach with their "Big Cleavage" enticing over 1 billion viewers to commit the sin of Onanism. And where were the LIEbral's concern for the environment – not even the EPA was at all concerned about cleaning up that mess.

Lifeguards are nothing more than a "make work" government program that dates back to the socialist Roosevelt administration and is a drain on the economy. Lifeguards for the most part sit around idle waiting for something to happen and collect a pay check. All it does is create a dependency class so that Obama can rely on the "lifeguard vote" in the next election. Those efforts could be put to more productive use in the economy.

[Jack O'fagan]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

Ive been thinking about this & wouldnt jesus be no good at this as he has got holes in his hands & feet.

Jesus would be the best lifeguard EVER!!

Matthew 14:25 And in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea. 26And when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were troubled, saying, It is a spirit; and they cried out for fear.
27But straightway Jesus spake unto them, saying, Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid.
28And Peter answered him and said, Lord, if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water.
29And he said, Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus.
30But when he saw the wind boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried, saying, Lord, save me.
31And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?



Glory!


Jack

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

We have a comedian among us, gentlemen.

[el hierro]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

Does rolling blunts mean beating up poofs with a newspaper?

[James Hutchins]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

Ive been thinking about this & wouldnt jesus be no good at this as he has got holes in his hands & feet.

Idiot.
Jesus can walk on water/. You really need to read the Bible instead of rolling blunts with the pages.

[el hierro]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

yes good point.

[Brother Temperance]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

Ive been thinking about this & wouldnt jesus be no good at this as he has got holes in his hands & feet.

Why don't you go for a walk on some water, and then when you get back from doing that, you can start throwing aspersions on Jesus' ability to get across large bodies of water safely. Those who drown in glass swimming pools shouldn't throw water.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

Ive been thinking about this & wouldnt jesus be no good at this as he has got holes in his hands & feet.

This is a serious site. It's not here for people to practice their stand-up comedy routines.

[el hierro]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

Ive been thinking about this & wouldnt jesus be no good at this as he has got holes in his hands & feet.

[dicker]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

So if your own child was drowning, you wouldn't save him/her?


I guess it's their own fault being lazy huh, being unconscious n'all at the bottom of the pool.

How's the lifeguard commiting a sin?

He saves lives, what do you want him to wear? a suit and tie?

In fact, you should change legislation in your town so you either have separate swimming pools for men and women or the women have to wear full clothing when they swim.

In fact, they shouldn't really have time to go swimming, I'm sure there's housework that wont do itself at home.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

Part of this initiative's purpose is to eliminate the potential for temptation.

Not only do life guards strut and posture, glistening in the sunlight on a pedestal for all to see like a golden calf, they also make it their profession to place their mouths on the mouths of people whom they aren't married to, and blow deep, erotic breaths into their lungs.

Jesus never did CPR, and I don't think we should either.

Here! Here!

This is Freehold, not Southern California. We don't need our children faking drowning just to get some oiled up muscle men in speedos to suck face on them in public! Lifeguards are just socialism for the gay lifestyle, nothing more.

[Ofc. Don W. Richards]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

Part of this initiative's purpose is to eliminate the potential for temptation.

Not only do life guards strut and posture, glistening in the sunlight on a pedestal for all to see like a golden calf, they also make it their profession to place their mouths on the mouths of people whom they aren't married to, and blow deep, erotic breaths into their lungs.

Jesus never did CPR, and I don't think we should either.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

I expect you'll also be removing and outlawing:

- all seatbelts, air bags, and turn signals from cars, trucks, and other vehicles
- all helmets, gloves, visors, or other "safety" related items from construction sites, fire crews, police officers, etc.
- all safeties from firearms
- all chain brakes from chainsaws
- all guardrails and railings from rooftops and stairwells
- all speed limits
- all user's manuals and training courses for power tools and high voltage equipment
- all childproof caps from toxic chemicals, prescription medicines, etc., etc.

Please let me know when you're "following the Scriptures" fully.

Much--It's obvious you do not know much about Christian governing.

To deal with scripture in local government, we must have (a.) a scriptural reference and (b.) someone committing a sin that we can observe and pass judgement on.

The No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus program was developed with these matters taken into consideration. We have the scripture and someone committing a sin (the lifeguard).

While I enjoy hearing from citizens, and respect your views, I hope you can understand this is something for professionals to handle.

[Didymus Much]

Re: FPD To Enforce the No-Lifeguard-But-Jesus ordinance

...What I should have done is to simply follow the scriptures. That's what we do in Freehold. God Bless us all...

I expect you'll also be removing and outlawing:

- all seatbelts, air bags, and turn signals from cars, trucks, and other vehicles
- all helmets, gloves, visors, or other "safety" related items from construction sites, fire crews, police officers, etc.
- all safeties from firearms
- all chain brakes from chainsaws
- all guardrails and railings from rooftops and stairwells
- all speed limits
- all user's manuals and training courses for power tools and high voltage equipment
- all childproof caps from toxic chemicals, prescription medicines, etc., etc.

Please let me know when you're "following the Scriptures" fully.