The official deity bodycount
We all know that being God-fearing is a good thing. Our creation scientists have completed an epic research project that statistically proves once and for all that the truly God-fearing become Christians – because the most fearsome deity is ours:
The Official Deity Bodycount:
Jesus 
Taiping Rebellion (1851- 1864)
20,000,000 – 40,000,000
American Indians killed
20,000,000
AIDS 1981-98
11,700,000
By keeping condoms away from sinners. Catholic Priests have 4 times more AIDS cases than the regular population. Does that mean Jesus gets 3 quarters of AIDS smitings?
The Thirty Years War (1618-48)
8,000,000
Saracens slaughtered in Spain
7,000,000
Jews killed in Holocaust
6,000,000 
France: Catholic vs. Huguenot (1562-1598)
2,000,000 – 4,000,000
Saxons and Scandinavian pagans killed
2,000,000
Rwanda and Burundi (1959-95)
1 350 000
Bush’s Crusade in Iraq
1,200,000+ (God told him to do it!)
People killed under the orders of God in the Bible
1,283,000
Spanish Inquisition (1478-1834)
350,000
Ivan the Terrible, Russia, (r.1533-84)
200,000
Bosnia and Herzegovina (1992-95):
175 000
Poland (1648-54) Jews slaughtered
150,000-200,000
Witch Hunts (1400-1800)
100,000
Peasants’ War, Germany (1524-25)
100,000
Vlad The Impaler, Wallachia (r.1456-1462)
50,000-100,000
Jews killed as scapegoats for Black Death, West Europe (1348)
20,000+
US Lynchings, first wave (1865-76)
3,500 – 20,000
Lisbon (1506) Converted Jews killed
2,000-4,000
US Lynchings, second wave (1900-50)
1,986
INVISIBLE HAND
Smoking, 20th century
90,000,000
Victorian Imperial Famines (1876-1900)
31,700,000 – 61,300,000
French Equatorial Africa (1900-40)
12,000,000
Congo Free State (1886-1908)
8 000 000 – 21,500,000
Slave trade (Christian)
15,000,000 – 20,000,000
Slave trade (Islamic)
19,000,000
Shock Therapy, Russia 1992+
3,200,000 – 10,000,000 (sources for Low Estimate and High estimate)
Climate Change, 1999-2009
3,000,000
Ireland, Famine (1845-48)
750,000
Destruction of Amazonian Indians (1900-99)
500,000
Forced laborers worked to death in Portuguese colonies (1900-25):
325 000
Rubber companies in Peru and Brazil, worker deaths (1900-12):
250 000
ALLAH
Chinese Muslim Rebellion, (1862-1877)
8,000,000 – 12,000,000
Timur Lenk (1369-1405)
5,000,000
Sudan (1983 et seq.)
1 900 000
East Pakistan: Massacres 1971
1,250,000
Iran-Iraq War (Sunni VS Shia) 1980-88
1,000,000
Arab conquest
698,200
Algeria (1954-62)
675 000
Hindus killed, India, (1366)
500,000
India-Pakistan Partition 1947
250,000
Lebanon 1976-2000
150,000
Syria’s Shia(Alawite) vs Sunni civil war (in progress)
100,000
Algeria: Islamic fundamentalist insurrection (1992-2002)
100 000
War Between Christians and Druses, Lebanon (1860)
30,000
Persia (1848-54)
20,000 Babis (Baha’is) massacred.
India, Sepoy Mutiny (1857)
15,000
Massacre of Armenians (1895-96)
5,000 – 75,000
Israeli War of Independence 1948
11,000
Bengali War of Independence 1971
11,000
2nd Indo-Pak War 1965
7,000
Shinto God-emperor 
Pacific war, 1933-1945
24,000,000
HINDU GODS
Thuggee human sacrifices
9,100,000
India-Pakistan Partition 1947
250,000
Widow Burning
62,400 per century until 1829
India, Sepoy Mutiny (1857)
5,000 – 75,000
PAGAN
Mongol Crusades
40,000,000
Human sacrifices during dedication of a temple of Huitzilopochtli in Tenochtitlan by Aztec king Ahuitzotl (1487)
80,000
South Africa, Xhosa self-destruction (1857)
40,000 starved
China, human sacrifices 750-1050
13,000
BUDDAH and company 
Taoist Yellow Turban Rebellion
3,000,000 – 7,000,000
Boxer Rebellion 
115,000
Vietnam, Persecution of Christians (ca. 1832-1887)
40,000
Conclusion:
I have not worked out the precise numbers but it seems Jesus is easily the most fearsome, with about one hundred million smitings to his credit before you even count His Invisible Hand, at which point it adds up to a quarter-billion confirmed kills.
The Pagan deity that sent Ghengis Khan crusading gets second place. After all, many of his Mongol warriors were Christians.
Allah and the Hindu gods seem to be tied for third with about dozen million victims, Allah wins the bronze though, because his number is doubled if you count slavery in the Islamic world.
The Hindu gods used to do a lot of sacrifices in prehistoric times, but unless they nuke Pakistan soon they’ll become a historical footnote among the God-fearing.
Non-Mongol Pagans seem to be the same story as the Hindus, though at least the pagan gods have the excuse that they hardly have any believers to do the smiting for them.
Buddah is pathetic, no wonder he’s so fat, having not gotten off his butt to do a single smiting for an entire century now.
Got that, God-fearers?
THE GOD-FEARING FEAR JESUS!
Replies:
Jeb Stuart Thurmond (30-04-2012 08:49 PM): Of course, how could I forget direct Satanists (not to be confused with indirect Satanists, aka Satan's useful idiots, aka everything who is not a True Christian(tm).) They've never had a government, ...
Jeb Stuart Thurmond (11-08-2013 07:57 PM): Another update for the god-fearing: With Syria's bodycount topping 100,000 it's time to consider if these smitings belong to allah. It seems to be mostly more Shia VS Sunni - a religiously-fuelled dispute ...
Jeb Stuart Thurmond (03-07-2014 09:35 PM): This is a tangent that might deserve it's own thread, but I'm skeptical when I read a history book that says that when soldiers capture a city, lots of rape follows. I think historians get this wrong ...
Jeb Stuart Thurmond (06-06-2015 12:24 AM): ...
Jeb Stuart Thurmond (07-01-2019 12:46 AM): If we estimate that the effects of climate change have been felt for a decade now, that's a total of 3,000,000 smitings (so far) for the Invisible Hand of the Free Market. It's been another decade so ...
Jeb Stuart Thurmond (16-08-2022 11:00 PM): Updates: The Pagan deities clearly read this thread and realized they had to up their fearsomeness. Thus we have:Covid-19, caused by Chinese traditional medicine 25,700,000 * *************** Wokeism ...
Show all 15 replies.