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eliot mayfield 10-10-2006 05:32 AM

Ask an ex pervert
 
Yes, I used to be a hard drinking fornicating sinner on the I-64 expressway to Hell! But I have been born again!
Praise Jesus!
I cannot express in mere words how much my conversion has meant to me. But, my expreince during the dark times may be of use to you as a warning. God does everything for a reason. Ask me what you want and shameful as it may be I'll try to answer.

Mrs. Rogers 10-10-2006 07:48 AM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by eliot mayfield (Post 8027)
Ask me what you want and shameful as it may be I'll try to answer.

There's a terrible rumour that you, during one of your alcoholic black-outs, wandered into a lezbean biker bar ... what goes on in those dreadful places? Is it true that they don't even allow balls on the pool tables? Did you really wake up with a half-burnt bra on your head and a pool cue up your bottom?

I only ask so that you can put the rumours to rest, Brother.

Rachael Van Helsing 10-10-2006 07:57 AM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Have you ever committed incest?

eliot mayfield 10-10-2006 08:00 AM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing (Post 8041)
Have you ever committed incest?

With a cousin. it was my first time. I was 12 and she was 9, but it was in Tennessee so it was fairly normal.

Mrs. rogers, I'll answer you later when I have more time.

Rachael Van Helsing 10-10-2006 08:20 AM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Have you ever hidden in trees with binoculars outside women's bedrooms hoping to catch a glimpse of flesh?

eliot mayfield 10-10-2006 08:53 AM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
I once hid cameras in a girl's locker room. Satan's grasp is strong and only Jesus can save you. Alcohol is satan's bait.

eliot mayfield 10-10-2006 09:47 AM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Mrs. Rogers (Post 8039)
There's a terrible rumour that you, during one of your alcoholic black-outs, wandered into a lezbean biker bar ... what goes on in those dreadful places? Is it true that they don't even allow balls on the pool tables? Did you really wake up with a half-burnt bra on your head and a pool cue up your bottom?

I only ask so that you can put the rumours to rest, Brother.

What little I remember was after donig some Tequila slammers with another guy, we decided "those babes just need some real men to make them forget about carpet cleaning!"

Things get a little fuzzy after that. Pink Harleys are an abdomination before God!

I seem to remember balls on the table, but the ends of the cue sticks are sorry to offend "phallus" shaped.
Me and Jeffers went in there and hollered, "hey, babes, we is here to show you what men are all about. Bend over and let us drive!"

About that time I got whopped in the head by something and that's the last I remember until waking up in jail the next morning. Sheriff Swafford felt sorry for us and let us go. We had to pay for the damages at the bar, it seems we put up a bit of a fight, but for some strange reason all my body hair was gone.

eliot mayfield 10-10-2006 12:13 PM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
I do want to make something very clear here. I am ashamed of the way i lived before I found Christ. I am only willing to undergo the humiliation of reliving these experiences in order to warn you what is out there if you let your guard down for a second and satan getss a grip on you!

Talitha 10-10-2006 12:20 PM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing (Post 8047)
Have you ever hidden in trees with binoculars outside women's bedrooms hoping to catch a glimpse of flesh?

I had heard you were "hard-up" for Male company Ms Hellfire, having a Gay Husband an-all but Brother Mayfield is an EX-PERVERT, he no longer has these urges.

Brother, maybe you can possibly remember some of the places you used to "hang out" so we can be rid of Mrs Hellflingers questions?
She can then go and play with real perverts to her hearts content.

SUV 10-10-2006 03:20 PM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Brother Eliot, why do preverts all wear those huge, tacky raincoats? They are way more than ample to hide their, uh, dubious... "Goodies."

Are pervs also heavily into Shoplifting, like say, big, choice hunks of Meat?

Waiting, wondering,

SUV

Hitoshi 10-10-2006 06:43 PM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by eliot mayfield (Post 8053)
I once hid cameras in a girl's locker room. Satan's grasp is strong and only Jesus can save you. Alcohol is satan's bait.

I am ask two question. are you have picture of girl locker room on video tape and how much money are you want for tape? I am also say something. you are feel bad for no reason! is not satan that for make you do this but is testicle. Man is want girl total natural and good thing! like spring water.

Bobby-Joe 10-10-2006 07:11 PM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Elliot,

Is it true that perverts hang around at rest stop men’s rooms, like the ones on I-80, looking for TRUE Christians™ to force into depraved and disgusting sweaty man on man sex? If so do you have a list of these rest stop bathrooms were this happens so we can avoid them and not catch AIDs and the gay virus.

Rachael Van Helsing 10-10-2006 10:45 PM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Sister Talitha (Post 8070)
Brother, maybe you can possibly remember some of the places you used to "hang out" so we can be rid of Mrs Hellflingers questions?
She can then go and play with real perverts to her hearts content.

:sarcasm: Oh yes, because it's my life's ambition to hang out in trees watching people.
I'm sorry but I do have my own life and that does not include sitting in trees or basements with binoculars, eating cheetos, drinking wine coolers, and/or watching Hentai anime.

Speaking of the above, in your ex-pervert days, did you do all of those things, Eliot? :D

Marshall 10-10-2006 11:46 PM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Hitoshi (Post 8113)
I am ask two question. are you have picture of girl locker room on video tape and how much money are you want for tape? I am also say something. you are feel bad for no reason! is not satan that for make you do this but is testicle. Man is want girl total natural and good thing! like spring water.

You are a depraved sinner with slits for eyes. Aren't there enough perverted videotapes floating around your radioactive country without pestering our respected Members for their shameful reminders of days gone by? You need to look into some Jesus before He kills you dead as Hiroshimas nightlife.

Marshall 10-10-2006 11:49 PM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
I have a question for you Brother Eliot.
Adults who fantasize about prepubescent boys are certainly the gayest of all aren't they? Did you ever come into contact with any of these perverts during your lurid past?

eliot mayfield 10-11-2006 07:25 AM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
I never had gay sex and wasn't at all interested in it! I was a red-blooded 100% Hetro pervert!
Hiroshima, the sex tapes were confiscated by Sheriff swafford, but strangely enough never entered into evidence at the trail, which is why I got off so easy.

Hellsinker, the places I hung out in are probably long gone by now.

As far as bathrooms go, do your business and get out!
One word of advice, if you ever go into a booth at a porn store to see what kind of filth satan is propogating on the planet, never stick your eye in the holes between booths. You might get it poked out.

Mr. Marshall, They are not only the gayest of all, they should be castrated with a dull rusty butterknife dipped in Hot sauce from Hell.

Fish 10-16-2006 06:29 AM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
THis thread is very disturbing...

eliot mayfield 10-16-2006 07:00 AM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Why do you find it disturbing? Does it bother you? You see when you let Jesus into your life you can conquer anything! I'm stronger than my perversions today. praise God and shout Glory! I have overcome. There's hope for you too.

Pastor Ezekiel 10-16-2006 07:23 AM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Fish (Post 9765)
THis thread is very disturbing...

This comment coming from a very disturbed false Christian..... :glare:

Witch Hammer 10-16-2006 07:51 AM

Re: Ask an ex pervert
 
Brother Eliot, I have a question...have you ever dabbled in auto-erotic asphyxiation, and if so, would you reccomend it do you have any words you could offer the confused, aimless youth (fish) who haunt these forums that would dissuade them from engaging in such a vulgar and dangerous practice?


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