Mormons Invade Bay Ridge
Ministry took me to Bay Ridge last night and as I was leaving to go home this morning, I noticed two lean, wiry, tall, neatly coiffed young men in crisp white shirts and ties riding bicycles. Seeing that they were going door to door I stopped to watch as they placed their buttocks on narrow bike seats and maneuvered the busy avenue.
After a half hour, having followed them for quite a distance, they finally found an older gent trimming his lawn who would speak with them. I heard, as they spoke loudly to him, something about a free Book of Mormon and then an offer to return to answer his questions about it. He placed the book on his stoop and went back to his yard work. I boldly went and grabbed the book and replaced it with a KJV Bible. I left a tract inside telling how to make things right with God. The Book of Mormon is now somewhere in the mafia operated trash system of Brooklyn, praise God. I am thankful that I was used to rescue this man from the snare of Mormonism and pray He accepts Jesus Christ before there is no time. GLORY!!!!!!! |
Re: Mormons Invade Bay Ridge
Oh Brother Larry, your boldness and bravery brings a tear to my eye! We need more men like you in our Christian Army!:wub:
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Re: Mormons Invade Bay Ridge
I've never really understood what it is they want you to do. A bit like JW's in that respect. They knock on your door. You answer it, maybe invite them inside as I did once because I was making cakes and offered them some on a plate with a drink. As an experiment I decided to agree with everything they said.
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And don't they have the worst idols? |
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You know, I sometimes have those young Mormon men come around to my house, too. Why, the other day as I was making my 4th of July flag cake, and a strawberry-rhubarb pie (and some scones), the door chimes called me to the door. It was those young men with their Mormon book. I suspect they could smell the aroma of the baked goods. They were very nice and polite, well-dressed, hoping that I would invite them in. They've been around before, and I always take care to show them the error of their beliefs, but they seem to think, very foolishly, that they can convert me to believing in their false doctrine. This time, once again, I kindly pointed out that they are going to :hell-2:, what with their strange beliefs and contradictory messages. Goodness, the :kjv1611: makes that abundantly clear here: I Timothy 1:4 "Neither give heed to fables and endless genealogies, which minister questions, rather than godly edifying which is in faith: so do." I had no intention of inviting them inside. Goodness, I was having a busy afternoon and I had no time for visitors at that point, wearing my apron and all. I thought that they understood that, but then they pulled out a phone and showed me the video clip that I'm linking below. Gracious, is this the way they carry on when they call around at all houses? They tried their best to use the song to tug on my old heart-strings, but I'm afraid it was to no avail. A blessed day to you, darling Great-Grandbaby Brother Larry, Lovingly, Granny Isabella P.S. May :god-fancy: bless you richly for your donation to the Brooklyn Recycling Depot. |
Re: Mormons Invade Bay Ridge
Dearest Darling Great Granny Sister White:
If those mean, icky poo Mormons bother you again, please call and I'll be in Buffalo in moments to run them away from your property. Are they handsome young men? To think of you there with their sultry eyes and fast hands just burns my britches. I can feel the fire in them now. Were they tall and dark? Short and stocky? But it doesn't matter. If my Great Granny is in need, size doesn't matter to me. I'll take whatever comes. They won't soon forget that I took them down. They'll be talking about it in Salt Lake City when I'm done with them. In the meantime, if I buy the ingredients, will you make me a strawberry rhubarb cheesecake and a Dutch apple pie? You could send them by Fed Ex. Tonight, if possible. It's the least you can do for my protective services. And a monetary donation to assist my ministry is always appreciated. You know how much I love you, Granny-wanny sweetie weetie Isabella-wella. In Christ, BrotherLarry |
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Now, I am more than happy to do some baking for you, dearest Brother Larry. I'm just so sorry that I'm only now receiving the message, as I would have stayed up last night to bake the cheesecake and pie. But, they're in the oven now, and I shall be wrapping them and sending them via taxi to you. And, heavens, there is no need to reimburse me for the costs of the baking supplies -- I am more than happy to do this! It's the least I can do for such a thoughtful, handsome, devoted, young :true-fancy: servant of the blessed :lord-fancy: :jesus-fancy: :christ-fancy:, and one who thinks nothing of being out until all hours, on his knees, leading other young men to the path of Salvation. A blessed day to you, darling Great-Grandbaby Brother Larry, Lovingly, Granny Isabella |
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