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-   -   Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE! (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=21150)

Talitha 04-07-2009 02:55 PM

Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
7 Attachment(s)
I was recently sent a copy of this advertisement by a poor persecuted Christian living in New Zealand.

Attachment 8462

It claims to show an obvious Jezebel smiling in Church because she allegedly has some kind of perverted sex toy in her anus. :angry:

Of course, I had to carry out research to find out what kind of disgusting item these obvious followers of Satan are peddling.
These are (apparently) anal beads:
Attachment 8463

I FOUND THESE ON A SO-CALLED CHRISTIAN MARITAL AIDS WEBSITE! :fear2:



The connection with this "item" and the Catholic Rosary is pretty obvious.
Here is a picture from as long ago as 1578 of a Catholic Homo and his Beads:

Attachment 8464

Just look at the way the creature is sniffing the beads :thumbdown:
YES! I said HOMO :angry:

Also, look at this Catholic Priest trying to force the beads on to a poor unsuspecting child!

Attachment 8465

To add insult to injury, these other items also featured on this Christian Pornography site. (Ladies, please close your eyes).

Attachment 8466Attachment 8467Attachment 8468

I have written to the owners of this site and raised the strongest possible objections. I have also demanded that they send samples of these items so I can see first hand how disgusting they are.


If you haven't already realized, "I'm on Anal Beads" is an anagram of Osama bin Laden :lex_12:

Jesus weeps. :(

eliot mayfield 04-07-2009 03:06 PM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
And I thought it was about Dingleberries!

Dr. Warren Wierdsbe 04-07-2009 03:06 PM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
Sister Talitha,
Thank God for the wonderful work you are doing in His Name! I have long thought about a possible connection between these two items. I would be most appreciative if you would keep me informed of your ongoing research into these depraved "marital aids." I hope to be able to help others in the future withstand these kind of temptations.

In Christ,
Warren

Nobar King 04-07-2009 03:17 PM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
The package indicates multi-purpose. What else could you do with that thing?!?

Bob4God 04-07-2009 03:54 PM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
I feel physically ill! Do the depths of depravity know no end?

Sister, I will be praying for you as you carry out your GODly research and crusade against perverted toys and those who sell them!

BEWARE however, because it's possible the toys were manufactured by homosexuals and are already carrying AIDS or the same gay chemicals that are injected into Skittles! :fear2:

Daisy Mae Johnson 04-07-2009 06:12 PM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
Dissssssssgusting! Leave it to the Catlicks to do something sickening and perverted with beads and butts.

:angry:

SUV 04-07-2009 06:46 PM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
http://www.landoverbaptist.net/attac...4&d=1239115054

...and to try to Torture a poor little Easter Bunny with those vile things too :(

Capt. Aaron Portway 04-08-2009 12:48 AM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
I'm sure the lesbian whores I've been keeping tabs on (Kristen Stewart, Nikki Reed, and Lily Allen) are all well acquainted with those disgusting devices.

Especially Lily Allen, an admitted 'back there' slut!:thumbdown:

Nurse Clampett 04-08-2009 02:31 AM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Nobar King (Post 313426)
The package indicates multi-purpose. What else could you do with that thing?!?

This guy could use it as dental floss.
http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/u...g?t=1239157776

Zipplock 05-07-2009 10:05 PM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
So talitha what kind of research do you plan on doing with them? im new to this site and don't know what you mean exactly.

angels 07-06-2009 08:45 PM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
Those things are perverted. I couldn't imagine the type of person that would use them. They are just plain nasty.:thumbdown:

Mrs. Betty Bowers 07-13-2009 01:31 AM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
Since I am certain this thread has something to do with Dora Denkins, I fastidiously avoided reading any of it.

I will offer this, however: "Satan's Rosary" seems redundant. Since the cheap costume jewelry Roman Catholics fumble their foolish way around while mindlessly repeating magical incantations is clearly a relic of Satan's Gift Shop, all "rosaries" of of the Devil -- regardless of how they are used.

Professor Tyeisha X 07-13-2009 04:57 AM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
I think if a lot of you tight-assed Christians (no pun intended) actually tried these marvelous toys, your attitude would change. The anus is not as dirty as your patriarchal, heterosexual society tells you. The anus is a wonderful fountain of pleasure, meant to be stimulated by your partner. My wife and I owe much of the satisfaction of our sex life with each other due to creative anal play on each other.

I would imagine once you people become ANALLY LIBERATED you wouldn't be so judgemental, racist, bigoted, and downright mean in real life.

JRFinn 07-13-2009 05:27 AM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
wait... aren't regular rosaries already of satan, seeing as how the catlick church uses them?

JRFinn 07-13-2009 05:29 AM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Professor Tyeisha X (Post 359600)
The anus is a wonderful fountain of pleasure

:fear2: Even as a fellow sexually liberated atheist, I find that a downright disturbing string of words, in or out of context.

Mary O'Bryan Thorne 07-14-2009 03:04 AM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
Oh deary me! It's time to redecorate. I had NO idea!

http://i26.tinypic.com/21cuhhs.jpg

Rev. Jim Osborne 07-14-2009 04:51 AM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by JRFinn (Post 359636)
wait... aren't regular rosaries already of satan, seeing as how the catlick church uses them?

Yea and if you would've scrolled just a little bit up you would see that America's Best Christian, Mrs. Betty Bowers made that exact same point. Try getting some original thoughts for a change.

JRFinn 07-14-2009 04:54 AM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
Yes, thank you for pointing that out, but I tend to avoid anything Bowers has to say. America's Best Christian? I'm not a man of the Word, but if there ever was a generation of vipers, it's LBC.

Nobar King 07-14-2009 05:02 AM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
Here is someone who made necklaces out of her own anal bead toy:
Quote:

anal bead necklace

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_7YY6d1WSHN...tk/s320/01.jpg
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_7YY6d1WSHN...V0/s320/02.jpg
Anal bead necklace by sylvain willenz.

series of rubber necklaces made from solid straight moulds dipped into liquid rubber. when cured, the rubber necklace is removed from the tool, creating a hollow and flexible tube. various shapes are obtained, from regular bead arrangements to random molecular conglomerates.
Disgusting.

Professor Bessemer 07-14-2009 05:06 AM

Re: Anal Beads. Satans Rosary? ADULTS ONLY PLEASE!
 
That certainly puts an even more offensive twist on the already ungodly practice of "necking"!


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