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-   -   When God attacks! (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=11207)

Brother V 05-05-2008 07:54 PM

When God attacks!
 
First on Saturday, God broke the front legs of that uppity distaff bitch mare Eight Belles.

Then he sent a cyclone to kill thousands of people in Myanmar.

More than 10,000 people dead, and one horse (that we know of, there may have been some horses on Myanmar, but I doubt it, they probably ate it already).

Last night I was watching a show about big fish on PBS (yes it's secular; but on TBN was a rerun of Rod Parsley, so I watched PBS) and they claim the reason that there's not as many big fish is because there are too many people.

Apparently God agreed and thought the number was off by about 10,000 so he killed some people in Myanmar.

PRAISE JESUS!

YIC
V

Nobar King 05-05-2008 08:13 PM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Is Landover sending anything to Myanmar to help the survivors? Maybe some Bibles (I'm not sure if we can get any in Burmese, though)?

Daisy Mae Johnson 05-05-2008 08:23 PM

Re: When God attacks!
 
GLORY!!!!

Just like Katrina! GOD is merely flushing his righteous cosmic toilet of "human waste".


Enjoy HELL sinners!!!! :sinner:

Freitod 05-05-2008 08:30 PM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde (Post 183343)
GLORY!!!!

Just like Katrina! GOD is merely flushing his righteous cosmic toilet of "human waste".


Enjoy HELL sinners!!!! :sinner:

How do you define a sinner (human waste)? I am wondering for I am quite different compared to normal humans. I love walking in the woods during the night listening to music. I love philosophy ( Nietzsche, Mill, Locke etc) and creating melancholic art. Is this sinful behaviour? I usually dress in black and I love the culture of my pagan ancestors (the vikings), am I going to hell for this?

Bobby-Joe 05-05-2008 08:34 PM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Freitod (Post 183346)
How do you define a sinner (human waste)? I am wondering for I am quite different compared to normal humans. I love walking in the woods during the night listening to music. I love philosophy ( Nietzsche, Mill, Locke etc) and creating melancholic art. Is this sinful behaviour? I usually dress in black and I love the culture of my pagan ancestors (the vikings), am I going to hell for this?

Were are you giving continuous, 24/7 thanks for Jesus in all this? Jesus died for your sins and all you talk about in "me, me, me, all about me".

Brother V 05-05-2008 08:34 PM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Freitod (Post 183346)
How do you define a sinner (human waste)? I am wondering for I am quite different compared to normal humans. I love walking in the woods during the night listening to music. I love philosophy ( Nietzsche, Mill, Locke etc) and creating melancholic art. Is this sinful behaviour? I usually dress in black and I love the culture of my pagan ancestors (the vikings), am I going to hell for this?

You are going to hell for your sins. It just so happens that most of the things you describe are sin.

Freitod 05-05-2008 09:02 PM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Brother V (Post 183349)
You are going to hell for your sins. It just so happens that most of the things you describe are sin.


Why? The bible clearly states that God loves us. If he loves human beings, then why does he let us suffer in hell or on earth? If God is good then why does he let evil exist? And why are we, being his creations, imperfect? It does not make sense.

Freitod 05-05-2008 09:06 PM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe (Post 183348)
Were are you giving continuous, 24/7 thanks for Jesus in all this? Jesus died for your sins and all you talk about in "me, me, me, all about me".

Because I have not been provided with enough proof to convince myself that God exists. Besides, I was desribing my actions and wondering if they were sins, please read what I write before you chose to answer, I have little time for explaning things that are completely clear to the average person.

SUV 05-05-2008 09:08 PM

Re: When God attacks!
 
"Myanmar"

This is an even more authentic Country than Bell-gum!

JESUS wants us to up our Tithes :tithe: with any Money we could have blown to the wind. My GOD, it sounds like another planet!!!

Bobby-Joe 05-05-2008 09:15 PM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Freitod (Post 183367)
Because I have not been provided with enough proof to convince myself that God exists. Besides, I was desribing my actions and wondering if they were sins, please read what I write before you chose to answer, I have little time for explaning things that are completely clear to the average person.

Of course silly you haven’t been provided with enough information about the existence of God, He wants you to worship Him out of Freewill, not because you are afraid of Him. Now if you don’t love Jesus how is He going to be able to stop from being damned to Hell? If Jesus answers your atheist prayers and behaves as He doesn’t exist He can’t help you.

Pastor Billy-Reuben 05-05-2008 10:26 PM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Nobar King (Post 183341)
Is Landover sending anything to Myanmar to help the survivors? Maybe some Bibles (I'm not sure if we can get any in Burmese, though)?

I talked with some folks from Samaritan's Purse and they already had some planes nearby, so I hired them to fly over the affected area and drop 10 crates of Bibles.

They said something about not having 10 crates Burmese language Bibles, but I told them that I would prefer to send them King James Bibles anyway. The Holy Ghost caused everyone to hear the apostles speak in their own language -- I'm certain He can cause the Burmese to read the apostles' words in their own language as well.

Pastor Billy-Reuben

Ezekiel Bathfire 05-06-2008 02:14 AM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Freitod (Post 183367)
Because I have not been provided with enough proof to convince myself that God exists.

In American, there is a difference between proof and Faith.

Proof, is rarely absolute proof. If you think about it, there is very little in the world that can be absolutely proven. Faith is what remains.

There is no proof for example that magnetism exists - we can see its effects but, because we do not know the final cause, we cannot be sure of it - but you have faith that magnetism is a fact.

Now, you ask for proof of God - this is ridiculous. God asks to observe His Word and have faith. He provides you with a manual - The Bible and lets you find out for yourself. If you cannot be sure, then, like magnetism, you have to have faith to make 100%.

I have seen people like you before, we provide many instances that point to the existence of God, and each time, you just say, "No!"

What I say to them is, "What would be proof for you?"

They then refuse to answer, which means that they would never, under any circumstances believe in God - they would deny God to the end. They waste our time.

Now, I will give you the same question, "What would be proof for you?"

BiskitFool 05-06-2008 05:28 AM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde (Post 183343)
GLORY!!!!

Just like Katrina! GOD is merely flushing his righteous cosmic toilet of "human waste".


Enjoy HELL sinners!!!! :sinner:

How dare you judge all their fates. You are probably the by-far the blindest person here. Cosmic toilet? how disgusting. I pity you and V.:thumbdown:

JennyD 05-06-2008 05:39 AM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by BiskitFoo (Post 183565)
How dare you judge all their fates. You are probably the by-far the blindest person here. Cosmic toilet? how disgusting. I pity you and V.:thumbdown:

Tell me, Foo, do you Seven-Day Sinners believe that God is omniscient (all-knowing) and omnipotent (all-powerful)? Or not?

Seeker 05-06-2008 07:24 AM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben (Post 183409)
I talked with some folks from Samaritan's Purse and they already had some planes nearby, so I hired them to fly over the affected area and drop 10 crates of Bibles.

They said something about not having 10 crates Burmese language Bibles, but I told them that I would prefer to send them King James Bibles anyway. The Holy Ghost caused everyone to hear the apostles speak in their own language -- I'm certain He can cause the Burmese to read the apostles' words in their own language as well.

Pastor Billy-Reuben

Pastor Billy,(of course Brother V) I think you must be the only sound pastors out there...ever..! You always make perfect sense.

It must suck for God to choose an area to destoy 10 thousand folks on the weekend..

I bet I was not a sinner last Thursday Night when I was caught in a simple Tornado... Praise! I just so happened to say sorry that day. Jesus works for those that seek him. He didn't work for those just 8 miles away from me on the North and South side..

Do these Asians even exist on the map of Jesus salvation plan?

Pastor Ezekiel 05-06-2008 07:34 AM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Praise Jesus! The slants killed by Jesus in that Godless cesspool now top 16,000! GLORY! :yahoo:

I only hope these numbers aren't adversely effecting Brother Monty's sweatshop factory production. :o

filantrop 05-06-2008 11:13 AM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde (Post 183343)
GLORY!!!!

Just like Katrina! GOD is merely flushing his righteous cosmic toilet of "human waste".


Enjoy HELL sinners!!!! :sinner:

The bible clearly states that love is the most important thing, not hate. Jesus said that we should love everyone, not hate them. So no one is human waste. At least not in a christian view.

filantrop 05-06-2008 11:22 AM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire (Post 183515)
In American, there is a difference between proof and Faith.

Proof, is rarely absolute proof. If you think about it, there is very little in the world that can be absolutely proven. Faith is what remains.

There is no proof for example that magnetism exists - we can see its effects but, because we do not know the final cause, we cannot be sure of it - but you have faith that magnetism is a fact.

Now, you ask for proof of God - this is ridiculous. God asks to observe His Word and have faith. He provides you with a manual - The Bible and lets you find out for yourself. If you cannot be sure, then, like magnetism, you have to have faith to make 100%.

I have seen people like you before, we provide many instances that point to the existence of God, and each time, you just say, "No!"

What I say to them is, "What would be proof for you?"

They then refuse to answer, which means that they would never, under any circumstances believe in God - they would deny God to the end. They waste our time.

Now, I will give you the same question, "What would be proof for you?"


You are absolutely right, proof and faith are to different things. Faith is belief, proof is more or less absolute. The problem is that God is concealed for most people. The fact that there are millins of religions claiming to be absolutely right, just like cgristianity does, makes religious belief difficult for the intellectual individuals. All religions say that they are absolutely right, all religions claim that they know they are right and that their God exists. They have very little or no scientific proof of this, and it is this that makes religion more of a belief than a scientific conception. We can, as you say, study the effects of magnetism, but most cannot "see" or study God. We see the effects of magnetism and it is sientfically explaniable (thanks to Niels Bohr's atom model). God is however not explainable to the same extent. The only "proof" we have is the bible, and it is to the ordinary man but a piece of embellished paper. So we have to accept that everyone is not religious, we have to tolerate them because if we do not tolerate them, then there would be little difference from us and the fanatic moslems.

filantrop 05-06-2008 11:26 AM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Ezekiel Flint (Post 183589)
Praise Jesus! The slants killed by Jesus in that Godless cesspool now top 16,000! GLORY! :yahoo:

I only hope these numbers aren't adversely effecting Brother Monty's sweatshop factory production. :o

Do you call yourself a Christian? A follower of Jesus? Jesus said that we should love each other, not hate each other.

Pastor Ezekiel 05-06-2008 11:30 AM

Re: When God attacks!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by filantrop (Post 183649)
The bible clearly states that love is the most important thing, not hate. Jesus said that we should love everyone, not hate them. So no one is human waste. At least not in a christian view.

You've never actually read the Bible, have you? :glare:

Suppose ye that I am come to give peace on earth? I tell you, Nay; but rather division.--Luke 12:51

But those mine enemies, which would not that I should reign over them, bring hither, and slay them before me.--Luke 19:27

"I [Jesus] will kill her children with death." Revelations 2:23


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