The Landover Baptist Church Forum

The Landover Baptist Church Forum (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/forumindex.php)
-   Pastor Zeke's News Wire (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/forumdisplay.php?f=13)
-   -   Back To The Fuhrer: Twitter would kill Baby Hitler. Would WE kill Baby Hitler? (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=115748)

Jeb Stuart Thurmond 01-18-2019 11:15 PM

Back To The Fuhrer: Twitter would kill Baby Hitler. Would WE kill Baby Hitler?
 
Twitter is wonderful, we all love twitter, blah blah okay, the twitter users have stopped reading by now, what with their short attention spans, dying batteries, and exploding Samsung phones.

No, twitter is stupid, people who use twitter are stupid, and Ben Shapiro is very, very smart.

Yes, Ben Shapiro just did what millions of pro-life marchers before him failed to do: make the media report on the March for Life. All he had to do was say these, short, sweet, twitter-friendly words:

"The truth is no pro-life person would kill baby Hitler. Baby Hitler was a baby" -Ben Shapiro



Ben Shapiro, a Jew, would abduct baby Hitler. Sounds like a far-fetched plan, but if anyone could and would invent a time machine and then use it to abduct Christian babies, it would be a Jew.

Me, I would use the time machine to buy lots of Microsoft Stocks. Preventing WW2 means no Saving Private Ryan, and that was a great movie. Also, I'm not one of those arrogant consequentialists who thinks they can predict the exact long-term consequence of their actions. I believe that the end's don't justify the means, because nobody can predict what the ends will actually be. Oh, and I love the scene with that badass sniper saying Bible verses before he shoots.

But anyway, now that the media's "Eye Of Sauron" is upon the pro-life movement, let's discuss: Would we kill Baby Hitler?
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DxOeVUuVYAAM4JD.jpg:large

Jeb Bush, who is moderately intelligent, says "hell yeah!" to killing the above baby:



He backtracks a bit, based on physics data he got from a Hollywood movie. But as for the actual baby-strangling bit, he will "step up" with no hesitation, mercy, or remorse.

Twitter, which is very, very stupid, says...Well, let's look at a sample of typical tweets I've already come across:
HOW WOULD U NOT KILL BABY HITLER? i would literally suck hitler's dad's dick and swallow hitler before he even became a baby if it meant saving 17 million people's lives.
Ugg, you know what, let's not quote twitter. Better yet, let's never speak of twitter ever again.



Dennis Lukes 01-19-2019 03:25 AM

Re: Back To The Fuhrer: Twitter would kill Baby Hitler. Would WE kill Baby Hitler?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeb Stuart Thurmond (Post 1244645)
Ben Shapiro, a Jew, would abduct baby Hitler. Sounds like a far-fetched plan, but if anyone could and would invent a time machine and then use it to abduct Christian babies, it would be a Jew.

Those sick people just love to abduct Christian babies for their blood rituals. Their sadism is not confined to "Goyim," as they hatefully call non-Jews - the kikes torture and mutilate their own infants! In a disgusting pedophilic ceremony, a Jew rabbi cuts off a male Jew baby's foreskin and then fellates the infant, sucking up the blood like a vampire. Why are these people not arrested and forced to register as sex offenders?


Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeb Stuart Thurmond (Post 1244645)
Well, let's look at a sample of typical tweets I've already come across:
HOW WOULD U NOT KILL BABY HITLER? i would literally suck hitler's dad's dick and swallow hitler before he even became a baby if it meant saving 17 million people's lives.

https://www.famousbirthdays.com/face...lois-image.jpg

Not surprising. Adolf's father Alois Hitler would be considered a prize "bear" if he returned to earth and wandered into a gay nightclub. Not that those fags have any standards whatsoever. They'll fornicate with literally anything with that has a Y-Chromosome.

Sally Paulson 01-19-2019 02:09 PM

Re: Back To The Fuhrer: Twitter would kill Baby Hitler. Would WE kill Baby Hitler?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeb Stuart Thurmond (Post 1244645)

Such hypnotic eyes....I became mesmerized by them and felt like I could hear the pitter-patter of goosestepping little feet, and then I had visions of adorable toddler nazis guarding an adorable little concentration camp....

https://www.famousbirthdays.com/face...lois-image.jpg

This guy made me snap back though. Looks like the time traveler got a bit toothy right when the picture was taken.

Brother Gonzalez 01-19-2019 05:48 PM

Re: Back To The Fuhrer: Twitter would kill Baby Hitler. Would WE kill Baby Hitler?
 
God put Baby Hitler on Earth and gave him free will for a reason. Even if we do not know the reason, there is one.Ok, millions died. So what? If they were Baptist, they would be know with God and Jesus, drinking, eating, playing hide and seek. It could be difficult to play hide and seek with God and Jesus, because one of them hides, and the other seeks, but they are the same person. So they see you, every time. And as they are almighty, they know where you are.
So if you win, you know they let you. And that's no fun.
But I digress, sorry, no, no killing of little Adolf unless commanded by God.

Sally Paulson 01-20-2019 12:54 AM

Re: Back To The Fuhrer: Twitter would kill Baby Hitler. Would WE kill Baby Hitler?
 
Jeb, why did you edit my post? Everybody knows that it's commies that do the "goosestep", while Nazis do the "duckwalk". It's the only way anyone can tell them apart.

See here: goosestepping commies:



And a duckwalking nazi:

http://coyotepr.uk/wp-content/upload...ed-reading.gif

Cranky Old Man 01-20-2019 11:53 PM

Re: Back To The Fuhrer: Twitter would kill Baby Hitler. Would WE kill Baby Hitler?
 
Clearly God wanted those Jews to die, otherwise He wouldn't have created Hitler. No doubt as punishment for the Jews killing His only son, Jesus, who is also God. Then why did God create those Jews, I hear some stupid crooked Hillary voting atheist ask? Well, to kill Jesus of course. Duh!

As to short attention spans, what were we talking about again?

Trent Harvey, Jr. 01-21-2019 12:51 PM

Re: Back To The Fuhrer: Twitter would kill Baby Hitler. Would WE kill Baby Hitler?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeb Stuart Thurmond (Post 1244645)
I'm not one of those arrogant consequentialists who thinks they can predict the exact long-term consequence of their actions. I believe that the end's don't justify the means, because nobody can predict what the ends will actually be.

So what you're saying is, you'd go back in time and teach Hitler to love Jews, only to see him become the founder of the Israeli Empire, which conquers all the Middle East and kills all the Arabs, is that what you're saying?

So you're saying you'd encourage him to stick with his art career, and then he'll get into pot-smoking, and then he'll become a super-drug-lord who invents crack, shatter and chrystal meth just in time for the great depression, which we never escape from because everyone's only buying drugs, which are too cheap to sustain a full-employment economy, is that what you want!

So you're saying you'd have him raised by the sort of people who adopt other people's babies, because you want him to start a UFO cult where everybody decides to put off breeding so they have space to adopt the babies of space aliens that never come, so the human population drops so low the animals say "bro, we can take them" and then the animals make us THEIR pets, is that what you want?!!?

Sorry, I've been picking up some bad habits from the academics that study me. Honestly, I don't think you're saying much at all.

Jim C. Lombardo 01-22-2019 03:39 AM

Re: Back To The Fuhrer: Twitter would kill Baby Hitler. Would WE kill Baby Hitler?
 
I think we could make it staged an accident, I mean babies end up killing themselves all the time, and really who do you think the police would believe at the end of the day - The sombre account of an upstanding Christian male, or a dead baby?

Just throw Baby Hitler into a pool and tell him to swim. If he drowns, then he was a dependant sissy boy unfit for this world.


All times are GMT. The time now is 10:37 PM.

Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved