The Landover Baptist Church Forum

The Landover Baptist Church Forum (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/forumindex.php)
-   Satan's Entertainment (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/forumdisplay.php?f=66)
-   -   Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=120054)

Johny Joe Hold 05-23-2022 12:42 AM

Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
We all know yoga is a form of the Hindu religion. Landover Baptist has been active keeping it out of public schools. Whenever possible, we advocate replacing yoga with prayer. Public schools should not be teaching Hinduism.

Satan is trying to circumvent our efforts by putting Hinduism in toy stores. This is happening with the new Yoga Barbie. Young girls follow directions given by Yoga Barbie. I can assure parents there is no Jesus mentioned.


Christian author warns against new Yoga Barbie | U.S. News (christianpost.com)


https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/i...yim4A&usqp=CAU

Isabella White 05-23-2022 01:37 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold (Post 1298574)
We all know yoga is a form of the Hindu religion. Landover Baptist has been active keeping it out of public schools. Whenever possible, we advocate replacing yoga with prayer. Public schools should not be teaching Hinduism.

Satan is trying to circumvent our efforts by putting Hinduism in toy stores. This is happening with the new Yoga Barbie. Young girls follow directions given by Yoga Barbie. I can assure parents there is no Jesus mentioned.

Christian author warns against new Yoga Barbie | U.S. News (christianpost.com)


https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/i...yim4A&usqp=CAU

This should surprise no :true-fancy: servant of the :lord-fancy: :jesus-fancy:, dear Brother Mayor Hold. Even :jesus-fancy: warned us of what the last days will involve:

Matthew 7:15-17:
15 Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.
16 Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles?
17 Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit.

It is no secret that that "yoga" nonsense has long been associated with evil, wayward persons, such as the hippies and the Hare Krishna creeps — and Goodness only knows who else.



In the attached video clip, you will see how yoga is promoted by persons with lunatic, corrupt minds. Clearly, these false prophets are all an abomination unto Almighty :god-fancy:! Whichever toy manufacturer is responsible for this Barbie yoga atrocity will burn in :hell-2:, along with the other demonic nutcases — including the one in the video below! (Please do not play this video when children, pets or persons with certain infirmities are in the room. Devilish forces from within the video clip could attempt to possess innocent, unsuspecting viewers.)


WWJDnow 05-23-2022 06:03 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
I don't eat yoghurt for this very reason.

Unfalsifiable 05-23-2022 09:22 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
If you're into Yoga when you next do your downward facing dog, save us all some trouble, keep going all the way to hell.

Mary Etheldreda 05-23-2022 11:35 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Satan hasn't come with horns and a cloven hooves for many centuries now, opting for a more modern look, and often simply working behind the scenes. True Christians will be well aware that yoga IS Hinduism, a dangerous religion that seeks to appease false gods but in reality calls forth thousands of demons. They are invited to inhabit the soul with every yoga pose. I have seen children possessed by demons. This is no joke, this is eternal life or death.

Satan is after the children. He wants to use them and indoctrinate them for his own glory. As these vulnerable children grow, they become rebellious, getting pierces in their faces, coloring their hair like Korean cartoon witches, getting tramp stamp tattoos at the age of 12. Many uninformed parents don't understand what's going on or why their children are angry and suicidal.

Jesus forbids eastern religions for our own good. Parents who love their children must clean out their children's room of all evil toys and demonic attachments, stop reading fiction to them, take them out of school, and get them familiar with the Word.
https://www.landoverbaptist.net/data...ipyXDm+IWk/9k=

Roland 05-25-2022 12:05 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by WWJDnow (Post 1298602)
I don't eat yoghurt for this very reason.

Does this work? It looks healthy.





At least she managed to chase to puppy off.

handmaiden 05-25-2022 07:55 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda (Post 1298619)
Satan hasn't come with horns and a cloven hooves for many centuries now, opting for a more modern look, and often simply working behind the scenes. True Christians will be well aware that yoga IS Hinduism, a dangerous religion that seeks to appease false gods but in reality calls forth thousands of demons. They are invited to inhabit the soul with every yoga pose. I have seen children possessed by demons. This is no joke, this is eternal life or death.

It seems to me that any exercise that isn't directly involved with performing a useful chore is a way of inviting Satan. It glorifies the body over the spirit and anchors a person to their physical existence which is fleeting.

Quote:

Satan is after the children. He wants to use them and indoctrinate them for his own glory.
Of course, he does. All his most dedicated followers are gay so it's his major strategy for increasing his flocks.
Quote:

As these vulnerable children grow, they become rebellious,. . .
So many parents think children need less supervision as they get older, but, in reality, they need more.
Quote:

Jesus forbids eastern religions for our own good. Parents who love their children must clean out their children's room of all evil toys and demonic attachments, stop reading fiction to them, take them out of school, and get them familiar with the Word.
https://www.landoverbaptist.net/data...ipyXDm+IWk/9k=
This is how you do it. Amen, Sister. People who leave their children to a "free range" existence are just signing their offspring over to Satan.

Golan Trevize 05-25-2022 10:12 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
I Have watched this video several times on slow speed, I can see the Demons entering her delightful intimate areas as she gyrates her body at ungodly angles. It is wrong to enjoy any piece of film this much?

Dr. Anthony J. Toole 05-25-2022 11:59 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Golan Trevize (Post 1298703)
I Have watched this video several times on slow speed, I can see the Demons entering her delightful intimate areas as she gyrates her body at ungodly angles. It is wrong to enjoy any piece of film this much?

Mr. Trevize - you won't catch any True Christian watching that filth. Let me guess, there's a knock at the door and it's pizza delivery? Fool me once, shame on you, teach a man to fish, shame on him. I don't know about in your culture, but in America we introduce ourselves before butting in on conversations. Here is the introduction forum - read carefully, apparently it's hard to do correctly.

Phil Ander 05-26-2022 10:40 AM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole (Post 1298708)
I don't know about in your culture, but in America we introduce ourselves before butting in on conversations.

Anyone with the surname Trevize comes from Cornwall, a miserable place in southern part of Godforsaken England. The menfolk are disgruntled grimy underground miners with side gigs as smugglers and welfare rorters. The womenfolk are slatterns. They mostly earn a living on their back. Since all the Cornish are related, retards are the norm when sperm meets egg.

Phil

Adam Fag 05-27-2022 06:58 AM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda (Post 1298619)
Jesus forbids eastern religions for our own good. Parents who love their children must clean out their children's room of all evil toys and demonic attachments, stop reading fiction to them, take them out of school, and get them familiar with the Word.

Where does "the east" start?

Johny Joe Hold 05-27-2022 02:14 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Adam Fag (Post 1298756)
Where does "the east" start?

Mr. Fag--Please note where the sun comes up. That is what educated people here at Landover Baptist call the east.

Unfalsifiable 05-30-2022 08:59 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
It's the right hand side of this:https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikiped...e_Universe.svg

Adam Fag 06-05-2022 03:36 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Unfalsifiable (Post 1298903)

I see. So the gap on the right is the Red Sea. In that case, Christ comes from The East.

Johny Joe Hold 04-26-2023 03:31 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Mattel, Satan's toy company, announced today it will market a Barbie with Dow's Syndrome. The Bible tells us God does not wants the handicapped in His face. He doesn't like them. (Leviticus 21: 18-19)

This practice of poking a figure in the eye of Jesus has to stop. We cannot have little girls thinking, "Oh, that's cute." There must be no disfigured of any kind on the toy shelves.

Barbie reveals 1st doll with Down syndrome (thehill.com)

Dr. Anthony J. Toole 04-26-2023 06:10 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold (Post 1308759)
Mattel, Satan's toy company, announced today it will market a Barbie with Dow's Syndrome. The Bible tells us God does not wants the handicapped in His face. He doesn't like them. (Leviticus 21: 18-19)

This practice of poking a figure in the eye of Jesus has to stop. We cannot have little girls thinking, "Oh, that's cute." There must be no disfigured of any kind on the toy shelves.

True Mr. Mayor but at least they aren't glorifying other poor lifestyle choices such as transgenderification or being fat. Excuse me, "healthy".

Johny Joe Hold 04-26-2023 06:41 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole (Post 1308761)
True Mr. Mayor but at least they aren't glorifying other poor lifestyle choices such as transgenderification or being fat. Excuse me, "healthy".

I taking bets now. When will the first Trans Barbie be announced? You have to remember, Satan never rests. Satan never has enough.

WWJDnow 04-27-2023 02:05 PM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
What little girl wants to play with a tard or a gimp or a spaz doll? Even by woke standards, this is just stupid marketing.

God made retards as a warning to the rest of us, letting us know that sin does not go unpunished. Maybe this new doll would be a good fit for a bullying Barbie, so little girls could practice taunting and pushing the sped kids around.

Dennis Lukes 05-05-2023 02:29 AM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold (Post 1308764)
I taking bets now. When will the first Trans Barbie be announced? You have to remember, Satan never rests. Satan never has enough.

Just do like the actual trannies do and take a Ken doll, put a wig and a dress on it, and some fake hooters. Those dolls don't have genitalia so you won't have to do the surgical penile inversion.

Didymus Much 05-05-2023 04:28 AM

Re: Yoga Barbie: Satan's New Twist
 
Thread could have been called "Satan's new flex". :D

"Twist" is good, too.


All times are GMT. The time now is 11:02 AM.

Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved