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-   -   I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=118280)

Pastor Ezekiel 12-03-2020 04:31 AM

I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
Hi there, my sheep. I'm still in the Philippines, there are tough negotiations going on with my pal President Duterte. We are doing some real estate stuff in case a good AMERICAN Friend of mine who's been mistreated and stolen his life's work recently decides to come over and spend his twilight years over here. I might return any day, but first I need to do a bold sacrifice and take the dreaded Covid-shot for you. Did ya'll hear! I'll take this demon bullet for you and fight the antichristbody demons within me to see if your souls can survive it when the new commie government of the former U.S. of A. makes it mandatory. It's Jesus testing us as always. But no worries, I have a good flock of 14-yo houseboys here to service my every spiritual need. The food is also very good.

I know that you've been praying for Prez D. to pardon me. Ya'll also know that I don't need it and that the irregularities of importing houseboys never happened. But. My innocence could be stolen from me by fraud documents that are piling up. So I've decided to accepts the Prez D's kind offer for a pardon. This means that by February, inoculated against any commie influence, I'll be returning. I'm ready for my 2024 campaign. I need the jet. I expect everything to be spick&span including my septic tank. I also expect Freehold authorities to take care of the Pardon Paperwork and send everything to me with stamps and seals and signatures. In blue ink, capische! Gotta go, the boys will be having a water polo tournament with me. Vote GOP. Keep up the fight. Tell Melanie that her hairdo needs updating. Tithe.

Didymus Much 12-03-2020 06:45 AM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel (Post 1277266)
...I'm ready for my 2014 campaign...

Jesusboy, you need to come up for air more often. :lol:

Johny Joe Hold 12-03-2020 03:20 PM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
All of that is good news, Pastor Zeke. Both we and President Trump need you in good form making deals and condemning sin.

As to the Airbus, I'm optimistic we can order it soon. The remaining sticking point is the one million we loaned the Trump campaign in 2014. We were promised it would be returned with interest shortly. It has not arrived yet. Maybe next week.

I was not encouraged by news the Trump campaign had not paid some airports for campaign services it had promised to pay for. Some of my Mayor friends have called to ask for advice. I tell them President is a man of his word. They also will be paid shortly I tell them. Privately, I'm wondering.https://www.landoverbaptist.net/images/icons/icon34.gif

Pastor Ezekiel 12-03-2020 05:54 PM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Didymus Much (Post 1277274)
Jesusboy, you need to come up for air more often. :lol:

:huh: What's your point sinner? I never wrote 2014 but 2024 and everything else is fake news or a fraud. Your Fate is to Burn in Hell! :sinner:

Joanna Lytton-Vasey 12-03-2020 06:56 PM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel (Post 1277266)
So I've decided to accepts the Prez D's kind offer for a pardon.

Obviously we all know this is completely unnecessary, but once it's been framed (the document, I mean) it will make a charming souvenir of President Trump's first term. Will you keep it in the pool room? I'm hoping you'll lend it out on special occasions for display in a custom-built, decorative-but-secure cabinet in City Hall.

Oh dear. Forgive me, Pastor, for wittering on like the silly woman I am. :giggle: I'm just so excited at the thought of us all meeting again once this little cold virus has gone away.

James Hutchins 12-03-2020 07:29 PM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
I know you do not need some mammy-pamby pardon Pastor. You have God as your witness and it it is up to those nah-Sayers to cross examine Him. Though it would be nice to get it framed and put on the wall along without all those nuance restraining orders.

WWJDnow 12-03-2020 09:42 PM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
It's worth accepting the pardon just for the chance to hold a document signed by President Trump in your hands. No, make that a second document, since I'm sure you'll be getting your hands on the check that he sends to repay the campaign debt.

Dr. Anthony J. Toole 12-03-2020 10:01 PM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
Make sure to cross your fingers when you sign it. Liberals keep blathering on about how Rudy's pardon would require an admission of guilt, which might then constitute a confession of a State crime. This is just a technical thing I'm sure that a few prayers and roving militia groups can clear up quickly.

handmaiden 12-03-2020 10:35 PM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by WWJDnow (Post 1277314)
It's worth accepting the pardon just for the chance to hold a document signed by President Trump in your hands. No, make that a second document, since I'm sure you'll be getting your hands on the check that he sends to repay the campaign debt.

I have a letter signed by our President Trump and I cherish it. The money that he sent separately was mostly tithed, but some of it went straight back to him. It was such a privilege to contribute to Donald J. Trump's campaign.


I also bought some food. But I felt guilty about it.

Isabella White 12-04-2020 12:02 AM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
1 Attachment(s)
Quote:

Originally Posted by James Hutchins (Post 1277300)
I know you do not need some mammy-pamby pardon Pastor. You have God as your witness and it it is up to those nah-Sayers to cross examine Him. Though it would be nice to get it framed and put on the wall along without all those nuance restraining orders.

Quote:

Originally Posted by WWJDnow (Post 1277314)
It's worth accepting the pardon just for the chance to hold a document signed by President Trump in your hands. No, make that a second document, since I'm sure you'll be getting your hands on the check that he sends to repay the campaign debt.

Quote:

Originally Posted by handmaiden (Post 1277321)
I have a letter signed by our President Trump and I cherish it.

Oh, this is so true. You've all made some very valid points regarding the value of the pardon -- what a keepsake, and one to be cherished dearly! As Sister Handmaiden has noted, just having a letter signed by our beloved President Trump is a treasure. Why, we must remember how so many people are always hoping that he will gift them with one of the pens that he used when he signed official documents -- priceless objects, indeed.

Now, as for the actual pardon, well, why not just accept it when it's being handed out, even if it's not needed at the time? Not only will it be another valuable collector's item, but one never knows when it will come in handy later on!

Dr. Anthony J. Toole 12-24-2020 09:39 AM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
As an act of graciousness, Trump should pardon Joe Biden for stealing the election. It's not OK but it's time to move on.

Johny Joe Hold 12-24-2020 06:05 PM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
Dozens of pardons are rolling out of the President's office just now. The President is so committed to justice he is freeing all of his friends. Merely being a friend of the President is not grounds for prison but that is what has happened.

These leaders, men of integrity and high moral standards, will now be ready to fight to the last man to keep Biden out of the White House.

Dr. Anthony J. Toole 12-24-2020 11:43 PM

Re: I Don't Need a Presidential Pardon but It's Rude to Refuse
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold (Post 1278450)
Dozens of pardons are rolling out of the President's office just now. The President is so committed to justice he is freeing all of his friends. Merely being a friend of the President is not grounds for prison but that is what has happened.

These leaders, men of integrity and high moral standards, will now be ready to fight to the last man to keep Biden out of the White House.

Receiving a pardon from the President is like being cleansed of sin. In these troubling days I am reminded of the political persecution of Jeremiah.

Jeremiah 33:8
And I will cleanse them from all their iniquity, whereby they have sinned against me; and I will pardon all their iniquities, whereby they have sinned, and whereby they have transgressed against me.


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