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HomoRise 05-16-2019 01:48 AM

Imma homo here
 
Friendly question: do you like trains?

Didymus Much 05-16-2019 01:52 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by ElmoRise (Post 1251726)
Friendly question: do you like trains?

What's "friendly" about ignoring our gracious hosts' simple request, as in "Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus."?

Isabella White 05-16-2019 01:59 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by ElmoRise (Post 1251726)
Friendly question: do you like trains?

Dear Miss ElmoRise: Welcome to :forum-fancy:, at :landover-fancy:. We are pleased that you have found your way here, and we pray that you are serving the :lord-fancy: :jesus-fancy: :christ-fancy:, which you must do in order to avoid spending eternity in :hell-2:, which is what you actually deserve for being such a wretched, horrible, evil, rotten sinner. You will find that we are a no-nonsense, strict group of :true-fancy: believers who focus on the mercy of the saving :blood: of :christ-fancy:. As such, we follow the :kjv1611: very carefully, and we have no time for other, watered-down versions of the Holy Bible, just as we have no time for trifling trolls who come around these parts to see how far they can push our sanctified buttons.

Now, then, that was the nice introduction, and now it's time to get down to business. To answer your question about trains, we are not interested in that sort of thing. At the top of the Introduction Forum page, you will have seen that we have asked that you tell us what church you go to, and what your favorite Bible verse is, in addition to explaining how you came to find :jesus-fancy:. Please do not waste our time with silly questions about trains, or other such nonsense. We are here to praise :god-fancy: and to declare :his: :glory:

Sincerely,
Isabella W.

HomoRise 05-16-2019 02:02 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
Cant really understand the golden text, but ok.

Isabella White 05-16-2019 02:06 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by ElmoRise (Post 1251729)
Cant really understand the golden text, but ok.

Silly me. I should have realized you most likely have a short span of attention. I've boiled it down for you -- don't forget the three simple requests:


1) Tell us what church you go to

2) What your favorite Bible verse is

3) How you came to find Jesus.


Sincerely,
Isabella W.

HomoRise 05-16-2019 02:14 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
Again, these are personal details i prefer to keep to myself.

Heres one thing: i am serb

God of Justice; Thou who saved us
when in deepest bondage cast,
Hear Thy Serbian children's voices,
Be our help as in the past.

With Thy mighty hand sustain us,
Still our rugged pathway trace;
God, our hope; protect and cherish,
Serbian lands and Serbian race!

Bind in closest links our kindred
Teach the love that will not fail,
May the loathed fiend of discord
Never in our ranks prevail.

Let the golden fruits of union
Our young tree of freedom grace;
God, our Master! Guide and prosper,(*)
Serbian lands and Serbian race!(*)

Lord! Avert from us Thy vengeance,
Thunder of Thy dreaded ire;
Bless each Serbian town and hamlet,
Mountain, meadow, heart and spire!

When our host goes forth to battle
Death or victory to embrace-
God of armies! Be our leader,(*)
Strengthen then the Serbian race!(*)

On our sepulchre of ages
Breaks the resurrection morn,
From the slough of direst slavery
Serbia anew is born.

Through five hundred years of durance
We have knelt before Thy face,
All our kin, O God! Deliver,(*)
Thus entreats the Serbian race!(*)

Didymus Much 05-16-2019 02:14 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by ElmoRise (Post 1251729)
Cant really understand the golden text, but ok.

Or English in general, apparently.

HomoRise 05-16-2019 02:26 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
So your logic is that i forgot an apostrophe, i don’t know english? Lol.

Isabella White 05-16-2019 02:32 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by ElmoRise (Post 1251733)
Again, these are personal details i prefer to keep to myself.

Personal details? My dear Miss ElmoRise, I see no reason for you to think that you are divulging "personal details". The three requests at the top of our Introduction Forum are for your benefit, assuming you wish to partake in the blessings that are found from associating with :true-fancy: believers. If I were you, I would reconsider. I think I can promise you that you will do much better at fitting in with us here when you do so, and I hope you will do this very shortly. You must remember that until you can trust us with some basic information, you are considered as "unsaved trash". Now, then, why don't you tell us what your favorite Bible verse is? If you show me yours, then I will show you mine. Romans 6:23 "For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."
Sincerely,
Isabella W.

Jim C. Lombardo 05-16-2019 03:21 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
Friend, your username raises concerns. Why would take the name of a peverted red doll that gets a rise from being tickled? :headscratch:

Elmer G. White 05-16-2019 05:16 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
Dear Visitor,

It is wonderful that we have people visiting from the underdeveloped Balkan countries. We do appreciate that you took the trouble to gain access to a computer in the midst of all the ignorance, poverty, famine and brutality that characterize your desolate region. Considering your roots, it is probably a miracle by Jesus that you know even the tiny bit of American that you used, but no doubt you'll improve once you join us in Proper Worship! :thumbsup: We have been praying actively that our beloved Brother Mr. Putin would take over your sorry excuse of a country and bring you to civilization. Perhaps you'll join us in this prayer!

Because of your obvious shortcomings, I prepared to you a Welcome in your own Balkan language! How great is that?! Here we go! Gėzohem qė tė takova! A mė kuptoni? Shėrim tė shpejtė! I also have a Bible verse for you in your own language!

Predikuesi 12:13
Tė dėgjojmė, pra, pėrfundimin e gjithė ligjėratės: "Ki frikė nga Perėndia dhe respekto urdhėrimet e tij, sepse kjo ėshtė tėrėsia e njeriut".

As you can see, we are the living examples of the people Apostle Paul mentioned in Colossians! Glory!

Colossians 3:12
Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;


Yours in Christ,

Elmer :bye:

Ezekiel Bathfire 05-16-2019 08:06 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by ElmoRise (Post 1251733)
Again, these are personal details i prefer to keep to myself.

Heres one thing: i am serb

I learn that "serbs" come from a place called "Serbia". I did a little research and came across:

https://www.urbandictionary.com/defi...=Serbia&page=4
Serbia
Quote:

A pathetic shithole on the balkans which thinks that it has a more glorious history that any other balkan nation.

They were only a power under Stephan Dushan but
Bulgaria has dominated the balkans 4 times and 2 times has been a major power in Europe in the middle ages.
By the time the bulgarians had a big and glorious country,developed literacy and made the cyrilic alphabet(which Serbia also uses!) the serbians were a stinky horde.

Not to mention that serbian lands were 3 times under the rule of the bulgarians in the middle ages.
Their second pride is that they won the second balkan war.That's all.
Idiot:Serbia has the most glorious history!
Bulgarian:read some history you idiot.And then go fight terrorists while bulgaria goes to the european union.
Do Serbs look like ordinary people, or are you not in "God's Image"?

Joanna Lytton-Vasey 05-16-2019 08:34 AM

Re: Why homo here
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire (Post 1251749)
I learn that "serbs" come from a place called "Serbia".

I know only three things about "serbs", Pastor Bathfire.

1. They come from a place that used to be part of Yugoslavia, and are commonly referred to as "jugs".

2. Everyone from the other countries that used to be part of the Yugo nations hates them. This is because they are mostly war criminals.

3. They provide a lot of employment in Godless Britain for translators, who are required in STD clinics, police stations, courts, social services and extradition departments.

BrotherLarry 05-16-2019 03:13 PM

Re: Why homo here
 
I think I had a blue serb suit as a boy. It picked up lint to my mother’s dismay and she was always using a roller on it. Finally she gave it to Tommy down the street who usually had clothes from Goodwill.

I welcome our third world friend cautiously and urge her to share how in the midst of poverty and illiteracy she is able to read God’s Favorite Forum. Perhaps she has help from somewhere outside her little-educated nation.

Isabella White 05-16-2019 03:51 PM

Re: Why homo here
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by HomoRise (Post 1251726)
Friendly question: do you like trains?

Well! I see that it did not take long for our Godly moderators to see through your pretense, Miss HOMO Rise! And I also see that you've been ignoring our friendly advice and have not shown your sinful, shameful face around these parts again! Don't say we did not warn you, because we've given you plenty of warning. The wrath of Almighty :god-fancy: is coming your way for not repenting of your abominations. Don't believe us? Well, here it is, from the :kjv1611: -- Galatians 6:7 "Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap."


Sincerely,
Isabella W.

Mary Etheldreda 05-16-2019 03:55 PM

Re: Why homo here
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by HomoRise (Post 1251733)
Again, these are personal details i prefer to keep to myself.

Heres one thing: i am serb

I'm sorry to hear that. Perhaps you should consider moving to a country that is a little more relevant to Jesus and his followers in the United States.

Basilissa 05-16-2019 04:35 PM

Re: Why homo here
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Elmer G. White (Post 1251744)
I also have a Bible verse for you in your own language!

Predikuesi 12:13
Tė dėgjojmė, pra, pėrfundimin e gjithė ligjėratės: "Ki frikė nga Perėndia dhe respekto urdhėrimet e tij, sepse kjo ėshtė tėrėsia e njeriut".

I know that you know all languages which are spoken today and most of those that are extinct, Brother White, but are you absolutely sure this is an actual language, and not a random collection of letters with a special preference towards the umlaut?! :fear2:

Dennis Lukes 05-16-2019 04:46 PM

Re: Why homo here
 
I'm extremely offended that this person's introduction to us includes such filthy, pornographic language. When HomoRise mentions "trains," he is NOT talking about locomotives. He's referring to a vile faggot sex act in which multiple homers back into each others "cabooses" in a line like a train, oftentimes smoking the pot to simulate the smoke of the steam engine. Well, young man, God hates queers running trains (Leviticus 18:22, Leviticus 20:13, 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, Romans 1:27, 1 Timothy 1:10), so what do you have to say about that?

Isabella White 05-16-2019 06:59 PM

Re: Why homo here
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Dennis Lukes (Post 1251768)
I'm extremely offended that this person's introduction to us includes such filthy, pornographic language. When HomoRise mentions "trains," he is NOT talking about locomotives. He's referring to a vile faggot sex act in which multiple homers back into each others "cabooses" in a line like a train, oftentimes smoking the pot to simulate the smoke of the steam engine. Well, young man, God hates queers running trains (Leviticus 18:22, Leviticus 20:13, 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, Romans 1:27, 1 Timothy 1:10), so what do you have to say about that?

Oh, my heavenly stars, Brother Lukes! Honestly, I had no idea that Miss HOMO Rise was speaking in code. It did seem strange that she would be concerned about trains, but, truly, I thought she had an interest in locomotives such as the Orient Express. Little did I know that there was a sinister, perverse reason for her question, but I did detect that she was smirking as she presented her question to our congregation of sanctified :true-fancy: believers here, at :landover-fancy:. Oh, well, I have a feeling that we will not be seeing her again, now that she has been exposed. If she should return, it won't be long until her account is marked, "Aeternal Damnation Assured"! A blessed day to you, dear Brother Lukes. Sincerely, Isabella W.

Johny Joe Hold 05-16-2019 07:18 PM

Re: Why homo here
 
This Serb woman might be referring to "Night Train Wine." It is fortified with extra alcohol that makes people pass out sooner. Lots of atheists throw it down:

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikiped...chen_drunk.jpg


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