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-   -   Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey! (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=50425)

Cranky Old Man 09-18-2010 09:32 AM

Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
The Nintendo Gameboy DS (the DS means Destroys Souls) or the upcoming 3DS (destroys your soul 3 times over) is about the worst thing a parent can give to their child! If anyone ever tries to give your child such a dreadful device, just kick them out of your house and make sure they never come back!

What will happen when your child has a DS? Because they completely stop paying attention to personal hygiene their hair and smell will become that of a retarded hippie! They will even start throwing their feces around instead of going to the toilet just to spend as little time away from their DS as possible! :fear2:

This is what your child will look like after just a few weeks of DS:
http://imgur.com/JVjhe.jpg

Once your child has changed into a DS monkey, it will be very hard to take away the DS from the child:
http://imgur.com/g6Xfd.jpg

A typical DS game. A femnazi bitch made by Disney and Nintendo, a match made in Hell:
http://imgur.com/GrEXp.jpg

This is not a coincidence. Hell and a Nintendo DS look almost the same:
http://imgur.com/X575N.jpg

So as you can clearly see, once your child has a DS it is too late! So you have to make sure your child never ever gets one! If you failed to prevent your child from getting a DS the only thing left are the clear instructions of the KJV1611 Holy Bible! You will have to poke their eyes out and cut their hands off to prevent them from playing with the DS!

Mark 9:47 "And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire".

Mark 9:43 "And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the firethat never shall be quenched".

Nobar King 09-18-2010 03:39 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man (Post 601927)

A typical DS game. A femnazi bitch made by Disney and Nintendo, a match made in Hell:
http://imgur.com/GrEXp.jpg

As soon as I point out the gratuitous crotch-shot and butchy man pants, some gametard is going to come in here and defend the artwork as enabling women or some other BS.

Nobar King 09-19-2010 02:31 AM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
I did a little reasearch on this digi-slut Kimpossible and found more evidence that she's a little whore.

More crotch shots:
http://imgur.com/CRthp.jpg

Dabbling in S&M bondage:
http://i2.ytimg.com/vi/IqFEhm5QGLc/default.jpg
http://imgur.com/ORU4G.jpg

Also, what is this thing?
http://s-ak.buzzfed.com/static/image...7065941-12.jpg

Felicity 09-19-2010 04:51 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
@Cranky Old Man I am glad my father does not allow me to play video games! :innocent:

Didymus Much 09-19-2010 06:41 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Nobar King (Post 602232)

Yarrr, it appears t'be a "bald pink beaver", tho more feisty than the local sort. (Ladies: DO NOT be attempting a Google Image Search t'disprove me words)

BelovedEternally 09-21-2010 11:57 AM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
That pink thing is a Naked Mole Rat lol

Seth Campbell 09-21-2010 08:13 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by BelovedEternally (Post 603240)
That pink thing is a Naked Mole Rat lol

Why would you cross breed a mole with a rat and then shave it bald? You people are sick, absolutely sick.

Dr. Zaius 09-21-2010 09:27 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
I'm not very impressed with the way monkeys are portrayed in the thread title, but I forgive you for that because I'm a Christian and that's my duty.

As to the naked mole-rat: normally I wouldn't post a yucky image like this one, especially one that includes blasphemy, but it seems to be relevant to this thread:
What is a naked mole-rat doing in a child's game that is intended for young girls?

Titus Templeton 09-21-2010 10:53 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Im not very in this "nintendo" and "disney" subject. But there is this kid getting possessed with a demon. You can see that the child gets possessed in the moment he unpackthe "Nintendo 64". I hope his parents did the right thing and beat the demon out of him.


BelovedEternally 09-21-2010 11:37 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Seth Campbell (Post 603425)
Why would you cross breed a mole with a rat and then shave it bald? You people are sick, absolutely sick.

Tell me about it, it is the grossest creature i have seen mankind make.

Corbin Castor (a.k.a. Duncan Hike's imaginary friend) 10-30-2011 05:40 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by BelovedEternally (Post 603495)
Tell me about it, it is the grossest creature i have seen mankind make.

actually just pointing out that the naked mole-rat is not a man made creature but is a natural creature, therefore a creature of god and should not be spoken of as such. how dare you speak of gods beautiful creature like this? :thumbdown:

Pastor Ezekiel 10-30-2011 07:02 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by rainbow"thunder"dash (Post 810904)
how dare you speak of gods beautiful creature like this? :thumbdown:

So you're one of these liberal hippies who want us to believe that everything God creates is beautiful and wonderful? Really? :huh:

Where does it say that in the Bible? :rtfm:

Evangelion01 11-03-2011 04:51 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Hey buddy, I have a DS, and guess what? Smartest guy in town. Nuff said.

Redeemed Papist 11-03-2011 05:01 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Evangelion01 (Post 812240)
Hey buddy, I have a DS, and guess what? Smartest guy in town. Nuff said.

Romans 1:22 Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools,

Evangelion01 11-03-2011 05:03 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
By pretending to be wiser than me by lecturing me, the same quote is applicable to yourself. By the way, I know I'm smart. I have an IQ of 164, and did very well for myself on tests, even without studying.

Redeemed Papist 11-03-2011 05:09 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Evangelion01 (Post 812246)
By pretending to be wiser than me by lecturing me, the same quote is applicable to yourself. By the way, I know I'm smart. I have an IQ of 164, and did very well for myself on tests, even without studying.

Who said anything about pretending? It's just in the Bible.

Many questions about scripture in that IQ test? I didn't think so.

Evangelion01 11-04-2011 08:50 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
No, it contains questions that measure logic, artistic reasoning, directional sense, and other thigns that require use of a person's brain, not Google and memorization.

Redeemed Papist 11-04-2011 09:17 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Evangelion01 (Post 812751)
No, it contains questions that measure logic, artistic reasoning, directional sense, and other thigns that require use of a person's brain, not Google and memorization.

Exactly! What use is all that once you are dead?

Evangelion01 11-05-2011 06:05 AM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
You know what... You're right. Thanks buddy. I'll throw away my DS as soon as I get home!

BumbleGear 02-15-2014 07:02 PM

Re: Nintendo DS / 3DS: Turns your child into a stupid monkey!
 
Once again something idiotic and stupid to something innocent.

1. Your child will not turn into a monkey.

2. That's a custom cover art. That's not what standard ds's look like.

and 3. ...................... Cut..........Your child's...........HAND OFF!!!!! WHAT!!!! WHAT KIND OF SICK, TWISTED BEING WOULD CUT THERE CHILD'S HAND OFF?!?!?! AND POKE THERE EYES OUT!!!!! THAT'S BEYOND INHUMANE. I HOPE YOU'RE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF. IF YOU WERE A TRUE CHRISTIAN YOU WOULDN'T BE SPENDING YOUR TIME ON THE INTERNET SPREADING LIES ABOUT INNOCENT STUFF LIKE THIS. IT'S UNBELIEVABLE!!!! AND WHY DO YOU HAVE A GUIDE TO TORTURING CHILDREN???!!! IF ANYTHING GOD WOULD SEND YOU TO HELL FOR THAT!!!! I SHOULD BE REPORTING YOU TO THE POLICE FOR CHILD ABUSE!!!

what makes it all worse is that in that guide there were people agreeing with you! My jaw was on the floor! You think Jesus is happy with you torturing an innocent child? I can't believe this!


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