Looking to be saved (former sodomite)
 

Hello True Christians™ of the internet. I came across this Godly™ website and was excited to join God’s Favorite Church as a redeemed Sodomite. I have renounced the disgusting lifestyle of faggotry and accepted Lord Jesus as my truest Daddy. I have hence had 3 beautiful boys with statuesque and angelic bodies. Praise God.

I am currently a member of New Destiny Church, in New Sodom (ie Orlando, FL) where Donald Trump’s (God bless him) favorite Pastoress Paula White (the honorary male) presides.

My favorite quote of the KJV (1611) Bible is of course James 5:14 “ Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord”. This keeps in mind that I was a disgusting, AIDS-ridden, boy piffleing , Sodomite. Yet thanks to True Christians Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord”.

Re: Looking to be saved (former sodomite)
 

The last sentence seems to have lost all hope of being grammatically correct. Letting that go, welcome to the LBC. I hope you find what Jesus wants for you here. Tell us more about the boy piffleing.

Re: Looking to be saved (former sodomite)
 

That sounds like an oxymormon to me - That's like describing myself as lithely Rubenesque.

Re: Looking to be saved (former sodomite)
 

Fortunately this thread isn't anything to do with you so you don't have to stress about it.

Re: Looking to be saved (former sodomite)
 

Joharis...? Did you forget your password? Tell us about "the boys". Gosh darn, the LBC welcome mat must be wearing thin.

Re: Looking to be saved (former sodomite)
 

:welcome-flowers: to :landover-fancy:, dear Mr. Henderson! We are so pleased to have you with us. Thank you very much for your interesting introductory message. It's so good to know that you have forsaken the pleasures of sin and debauchery, and that you are walking with the :lord-fancy: :jesus-fancy: daily.

I am sure that you will find much here to strengthen your faith in Almighty :god-fancy:. I should note that we read only the blessed :kjv1611:, as we have no time for those other watered-down versions of scripture.

Please, do feel free to browse through our many relevant forums here. Undoubtedly, you will meet many :true-fancy: servants of :jesus-fancy: here, and all are more than happy to help you to serve :god-fancy: truthfully and effectively.

May the :lord-fancy: bless you, Dear; as you seek :him-fancy: — here, at :forum-fancy:.

Re: Looking to be saved (former sodomite)
 

https://www.landoverbaptist.net/imag.../firedevil.gif Demons are very active in these last days.