Thread: Annual Apostles Park Court Garage Sales
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Default Annual Apostles Park Court Garage Sales - 09-03-2014, 06:32 AM
The thrifty True Christian™ shouldn't miss the annual Apostles Park area garage sales! Yes, once again the residents of this exclusive haven of heaven in Freehold will be holding a huge sale. Over 15 families have banded together for the event. Among the items we have thus far:

Life-sized resin statues of our Lord for your front yard (the arms wave as traffic goes by - it's just a must-see feature)

Men's, women's, and children's church approved clothing

Stoning bags (many with stones)

Mother's hand made Bible covers (can be customized)

Hand massagers (to bring tingling relaxation and ease to stiff, achy joints)

Freshly baked pies, cookies, cakes, and scones

Rare DVD's of Mistress Cookie's Hollywood career highlights

All proceeds from this year's sale will help support our senior pastor's mission trip to Japan (those vending machines aren't free, you know!)

IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO DONATE: A collection bin will be placed at the south and west entrances on concourse D near the platinum tither's ramp to the main sanctuary. The bleacher seats may donate by placing items in the paper sacks placed on each seat.

The sale date is to be announced soon; we're hoping for October 18th should the Lord tarry.

Exciting news: Pastor Zeke has donated one of the shirts he wore during his evangelistic campaign to the godless land of Burkina Faso in 2013! This one will be sold via silent auction! We're still trying to talk Sister Daisy into donating the Dolly Parton wig she wore during our Dolly Parton Lookalike for the Lord contest that was held just before our annual stoning festival this year. Come on, sweetheart! It's for Zeke, after all. God knows you won't get anything else out of him. Except promises.

1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
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