[Mary Etheldreda]

To the Parents of Freehold,


Please do keep in mind that our Summer Bible Camps and Vacation Bible Schools will continue to serve Christ by delivering demons and satanic spawn from your dear children. While every good parents believes their child is impervious to such infestation, like lice, demons and evil spirits can and do attach themselves to children when parents least expect it. When children sit together in close contact topics of Pokemon, and Mario Kart, and that Harry Potter spin-off Gringot's Magical Beasts, and all of these violent games and stories come up, and little creepy crawlies spread from one head to the next, both corporeal and spiritual. Children are sin-born and natural liars and so cannot be trusted. The camp counselors will make no assumptions but will act in accordance to the prompting of the Holy Ghost in their spirits in these matters.

I would like to remind parents to have their children brush their teeth before coming to camp, as last year two of our teen counselors got violently ill when getting too close to the breath of some children who will remain nameless. Let this serve as a warning that living in a trailer is not an excuse for bad hygiene. I won't call anyone out, but Mrs. Rhiner is not the only one with children who smell like a combination of eggs and raw meat sacs left out in the sun all day.

Children should be prepared to give their hearts and souls to Christ again this summer in case last year's baptism was a trick of the flesh put on by Satan himself, as he is wont to do. Because children don't always understand the work of Satan upon their flesh and often mistake it for feelings of independence and defiance, there will be no letter sent home for the duration of the camp once again. You can pick up your child's letters when you pick up your child at the end of camp.

Please call Cookie in the office if you have any questions.

Thank you.