Re: Brethren, we need to talk about MILFs. -
07-21-2022, 06:55 PM
This is not just one isolated instance. Over and over again I have seen this demographic take on huge responsibilities, only to slack worse than a road crew because they believe that only the appearance of good intentions matters, and if you care about actual results you're either a hysterical loser or a slavedriving jerk.
My mother was an elementary school teacher who doesn't like kids at all. She thinks they're not civilized, they're not classy, and they don't match the carpets. My sister drowned within seconds of her life literally at the feet of my Mom, who was gabbing with her fellow boomer in full social-tunnel-vision mode until someone else shouted to her. Later she would tell the story like she was a lifeguard on Baywatch or something.
When I was a baby she left me outside on a winter night and just plain forgot about me, until I'd gotten frostbite. A few moments more and my penis would have needed to be amputated, which would have been just as well seeing as how much use it's been to me.
Every time I try to court a woman, I automatically go into a "finally, a chance for some attention from mommy" mode that is -10 on the attractiveness scale, if Jefferey Dahmer is a 0. I know I'm supposed to do all sorts of pick-up-artist mind-games, fool her into thinking I'm a granny-stabbing biker fresh from his latest gangrape, but I just can't will myself to do it. My one and only hope is to be good at music.
...Which I'm not, because singing takes confidence, and every instrument takes multi-tasking abilities. I may have had a chance with bass guitar, but because my high school music class already had one bass guitarist, and 4 drummers, the teacher decided to make me the 5th drummer. I'm too old to play bass guitar today, my wrists have repetitive stress injuries from....I dunno, I'll let you guess.
And then there's the shrink who reads her newsfeed while I pour my heart out about my life, and when I stop talking, she keeps on saying "uh-huh, right, oh, uh-huh". If my life was a comedy people would say it's too exaggerated and unrealistic.
Last edited by Jeb Stuart Thurmond; 11-14-2022 at 04:04 PM.
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