Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
The simplest solution would be to just stay indoors. My wife Cindy Lou is never allowed outside. That means I have to take care of the yard work, but at least the liberal media won't be sniffing around her looking for bruises and open sores.
If there is an emergency, and you must go outside for some reason, perhaps during a blizzard as a punishment, then have the Reverend Jim Osborne perform a Christian laying on of hands. This is sure to cover up any unsightly topical damage.
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Excellent solution.
The only time I really go outside is to hang the laundry and do yard work, and I can have my four daughters do that until the bruises heal.