[Dennis Lukes]

It's not as crazy as it sounds. The dipshit doctrine of their cult requires them to carry a concealed knife called a kirpan with them at all times. This sometimes gets them in trouble with the law, because only an idiot would try and sneak a knife onto a plane or into a school. Clearly, they see themselves as badass outlaws who are always ready to throw down, not unlike the worldview of the Hells Angels. The Angels revere their death's head patch no less than the Sikhs revere their turbans. Members of both groups frequently sport beards and long hair. Both groups owe their spread to a charismatic leader, Guru Nanak and Sonny Barger. Hells Angels are well known for their violent ways, as are the Sikhs who, among other things, assassinated Indian Prime Minister Indira Ghandi. There are hundreds of Hells Angels in Canada, and even more Sikhs such that one, Jagmeet Singh, leads a communist third party. Both groups piss on the Bible and flip off Jesus. Whatever minor differences exist between the Hells Angels and the Sikhs will burn away in the lake of fire.