[Santa Claus]

Originally Posted by handmaiden

Wrong edition!

Does your wife and/or the elves have to read all those deluded children's letters to you?

Jesus would have known which Trixie Belden #14 Mystery of the Emeralds that I was talking about--even if I hadn't specified "Deluxe Edition".

Jesus knows everything. And I have never tried hiding things inside of a hollowed out book. That's what boxes of feminine hygiene products are for.

Of course, Dear, and Ho! To be frank, by strategy of intimidation (shared by J-zuz) is more or less something that is just promoted by tired parents without any real threat of cutting down the plastic mountain of the Holidays (Jesus's isn't). I always deliver.

Does Jesus deliver?

He might know (but I think he's too busy watching Netflix and being hidden and mysterious) what you desire but where are the packages by the chimney with his name on the label? I don't promise to deliver post-mortem, I actually deliver now and here. You can assess and verify my deliveries. Sometimes you might be disappointed and throw a cute tantrum (in your case, almost always but you still enjoy the brandy). You won't need hearsay or assertions to get proof of my activities. Look at the image below. It is an actual photo of my activities. I don't work in mysterious ways. I bring bright-colored joy for the forlorn, the elated, the rich, the poor, the medium-income, the young, the old, the stupid, the heretic, the believer and the belieber. You don't have to clap your hands and proclaim that you believe in fairies. The mountain of plastic toys remains regardless. Still waiting for that mustard seed to get the mountains redecorated. Peace!





AND Ho.