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Repenting jooboy
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Touched by Jesus Friend of Jesus Ready for the Rapture Paula Deen Negro Support Group A for Effort Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus

 
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Default Re: So Much to Catch up on - 06-16-2019, 10:38 PM

My and what a lovely young woman you are, Sister Maxine. I knew a Maxine Helphenstein back home but she was a harlot, never caring to whom she gave her lox and bagels. Oy but my mama hated her but my father thought she was a cute little tart. I was indifferent.


You've asked many questions and most are quite personal. I may decline some of them, but who knows? I'm hiding nothing.


1. I am quite well off. I have over 14 million in the bank and from sales of my new book, "I Killed Jesus and Lived to Have Him Forgive Me," I am bringing in thousands a week. No sign of that slowing down anytime soon and I have a new book coming in the fall, "Yes, YOU Killed Jesus, You Low-life Joo." Preliminary orders are strong.


2. I converted to fundamentalist Baptist when I joined this forum so long ago. Oy but I was such a dork back then I've maintained my suave and debonair appearance but my personality is much more Christlike.


3. Prenups are ok I guess. I believe in trusting each other, but I'll talk about it when the right young princess woos me.


4. I sold the business I owned after inheriting it from father. I do invest in Amazon, Google, and Eli Lilly.


5. Been there, done that.


6. A wedding is a wedding. Arrangements can be made by whoever in my opinion. I'd pay for it as long as it doesn't get ridiculous.


You should know if you're trying to present me to your father that I am a Bible believing man and you're getting a bit old to be a serious prospect. As you can imagine, someone with my looks and background is considered quite the catch but I'm very picky about things like virginity checks and other things I've learned about from Landover's fine men, whom I consider my mentors.


Oy. Mama is on the phone again. This woman calls ten times a day if she calls once. "what you doing, Morty?" "Found a wife, Morty?" oy. I hope her bedsores heal soon so I can visit and get her off my phone. A room I can walk out of. The phone? So rude to just hang up.


Yours in the Christ I Killed,
Morton
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