19 signs your kid is into Black Metal:
- Has more fun listening to his music backwards than forward.
- Now he only wears black clothes or heavy metal t-shirts.
- Kid won't make his bed or clean his room.
- Talks back to parents.
- Won't take out the trash.
- Thinks Tom Sawyer lives in the future and drives a red sports car.
- Won't do his homework.
- Only wants to eat meat and won't eat his vegetables.
- Constantly using a sharpie to mark an x on the top of each hand.
- Keeps begging you to buy him ANOTHER Metallica album.
- Thinks some trashy rockers like Venom or Raven are the best.
- Always wears a trenchcoat, even in summer.
- Won't tie shoes or even put shoelaces into shoes.
- Cutting band names like SLAYER into his arm.
- Claims to be an atheist despite hoarding records and posters with photos of goats, pentagrams, and even Satan!
- Wants his first car to be some kind of van halen even though there is no where to park it.
- Keeps talking about how great going to gwar would be, but doesn't want to join the army.
- Wants to learn how to tie a slipknot but has no interest in sailing.
- Thinks King Diamond is the king of Norway.