Thread: Poems about the Gospels
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Default Re: A Poem about the Gospels - 02-05-2009, 06:10 AM
A Poem Based On Deuteronomy

Kill all prophets if they prophesy wrongly!!!
Kill family, friends, and neighbors if they serve other gods!!!
Kill rebellious sons, adulterers, and women who are raped and go unheard!!!
Destroy the holy places and items of other religions!!!
Cut off a woman's hand if she touches a man's secrets while he tries to kill her husband!!!
If you see a beautiful prisoner of war you'd like as your wife, take her home and go in unto her!!!
Treat both your wives fairly, even though you hate one - make sure you always treat your first-born son the best!!!
If you marry a woman and then proclaim she is not a virgin publicly, her parents must come forward and show the sheets you two consummated the marriage and, show everyone the blood stains to prove her virginity - otherwise she gets killed - if there are no tokens of virginity, then the man will be chastised, forced to pay his father-in-law 100 shekels and never be allowed to get a divorce!!!
Women who wear men's clothes are abominations unto the Lord!!!
Don't mix different fibers in your clothes!!!
If you rape a woman, pay her father 50 shekels to make up for it!!!
If your genitals are damaged you cannot enter the congregation of the Lord!!!
If within the last ten generations any of your ancestors were conceived illegitimately, you cannot enter the congregation of the Lord!!!
If you have a wet dream, you have to go out to the wilderness, wash yourself, and aren't allowed to come back until the next sunset!!!
Bury your feces in a holy in the ground, because God is walking all around us!!!
If you marry a woman, and then find some uncleanness in her, you can send her away - if she gets remarried and then her new husband either dies or divorces her, you can't marry her again, for this is an abomination before the Lord!!!
OBEY!!!
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