Quote:
Originally Posted by Mistress Cookie
You know, I've never admitted this to anyone
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Actually, I heard it through the prayer request grapevine a long time ago. I prayed for your soul over this many times.
Can I share my faith with you?
You see, that song was written by a group who's name - Badfinger - should tell you all you need to know. They were accomplices of John "bigger than Jesus" Lennon, and in an example of how songs influence people, one of them self-murdered, and then the other decided he "can't live with you" and self-murdered also.
I'm sure they have a long list of other sins, I'm just focusing on the ones that are related to the song.
So, by singing that song, Mariah Carey has - bless her soul - condemned her soul to eternal torture in Hell. And, while I'm not racist, I've heard that the mulatto part of hell is especially bad. You don't want to end up there.
If this sounds too harsh, remember I'm forgiven, not perfect. I'm just speaking the truth in love. Any other vile sins you've committed for me to pray for you about?
EDIT: I'm getting emails from people who claim that Mariah is alive and that there's a case of mistaken identity going on. Listen up everyone: when I say something, I'm always
110% CERTAIN and
I DO NOT FLIP-FLOP. That means MARIAH CAREY IS DEAD!
I SAID IT,
I BELIEVE IT,
THAT SETTLES IT!